[MatBell]

Any of you who are adults but feel like you don’t have control over your life? Who feels like you’re just not good at “living” and managing the things you are expected to as an adult?

I do and I’m embarrassed about it. I feel like everyone got the “how to live successfully as a grown-up” manual and I didn’t for some reason.

[Deejay14]

Mat, experience is a great teacher. It will come.

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by Deejay14

Mat, experience is a great teacher. It will come.

Thank you. Maybe it will. It’s been a tough road so far And right now is pretty bad for me.
I hope it gets better with time.

[BreakForTheLight]

You are definitely not alone. I constantly wonder how other people do it.

[shellykwebb]

One of my biggest anxiety issues is that I do not have control of my life as an adult and i can't stand it. I get so worked up about it.

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by shellykwebb

One of my biggest anxiety issues is that I do not have control of my life as an adult and i can't stand it. I get so worked up about it.

Yes and on top of that I spend a lot of energy pretending and not being totally honest about my life with people. It’s exhausting.

[shellykwebb]

I understand. It all catches up and wears you out.

[MtnTime2896]

Oddly enough, I thought I had it all down a couple years ago. Then I had my first real breakdown years ago and have completely and utterly failed as an adult since. It sucks.

[Wild Coyote]

I also feel I used to manage my life better. I have declined in the area of organization, etc. I've been very frustrated with my deficits.


WC

Originally Posted by MatBell

Any of you who are adults but feel like you don’t have control over your life? Who feels like you’re just not good at “living” and managing the things you are expected to as an adult?

I do and I’m embarrassed about it. I feel like everyone got the “how to live successfully as a grown-up” manual and I didn’t for some reason.

Yeah I do feel I'm just not good at “living” and managing the things I m expected to as an adult.

I don't feel embarassed, but sad and disappointed with myself. But then I can always learn.

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by Desiree2006

Yeah I do feel I'm just not good at “living” and managing the things I m expected to as an adult.

I don't feel embarassed, but sad and disappointed with myself. But then I can always learn.

Good that you feel that way. I want to be better to not feel like I have to be exactly like others in every way. I can’t compare the two since they don’t have my life story.

[CeliaA]

One thing I learn to get myself out of adulthood and the responsibility I’m shouldering is to tell myself “don’t self-pity, get on and face the everyday challenge and take down the hurdles “

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by MatBell

Any of you who are adults but feel like you don’t have control over your life? Who feels like you’re just not good at “living” and managing the things you are expected to as an adult?

I do and I’m embarrassed about it. I feel like everyone got the “how to live successfully as a grown-up” manual and I didn’t for some reason.

This discribes me 100 percent .

[Sassandclass]

OP, I love this post. Adulting is one of the hardest things to do sometimes haha! When I think of my parents and how many kids and responsibilities they already had at my age... it boggles my mind. How did they do it??

But in reality, I think we all have the “instagram effect” sometimes in real life. We only see very small parts of who someone really is. We don’t know their inner insecurities, how much they’re faking it till they make it, how much they’re actually struggling. Some people are just better at hiding it than others.

I remember when I was young I said to my brother, I can’t wait wait until I’m in my 20s. Everyone seems like they have it alllll figured out, and they’re so cool. And he said (he was in his 20s at the time), don’t be fooled - nobody really has it figured out. And nobody really feels 100% cool deep down.

Now that I’m in my 30s I can completely agree. Although I’m comfortable with who I am, and I take care of business like a boss - I still feel like that little kid most days. And I’m
just figuring it out as I go along (like everyone else )

Originally Posted by MatBell

Any of you who are adults but feel like you don’t have control over your life? Who feels like you’re just not good at “living” and managing the things you are expected to as an adult?

I do and I’m embarrassed about it. I feel like everyone got the “how to live successfully as a grown-up” manual and I didn’t for some reason.

I can relate to this, greatly. I was always the "diseased" child that was always reminded that I wasn't "normal". Therefore, I had to try to "be like everyone else" if I was to be "normal". Now, I just don't care. I am who I am and if that means I ain't like everyone else, screw it.

I do suffer greatly with social anxiety and agoraphobia. I believe this is due to the "lack of discipline" I had growing up. Because of that, I did not have the proper "training" on how to "deal with the world". Thus, it's all "overwhelming" to me.

I guess for what I can say is this. I feel I do well in managing my living affairs (such as paying the bills, keeping my place clean, shopping, and being very organized at doing domestic stuff). I was doing well recently with saving money and then that disaster of the water leak in my bathroom took that savings away. Stuff like that always happens to me. And I'm still fighting with the HOA to get reimbursement for what they are responsible for.

Other than that, I feel like the job I have seems under for what I could have had. Though I like my job, I feel like I could have done much better.

As for my social life, well that's a whole different story. I feel like I have done so miserably on that! I have lacked friends for as long as I remember. I was always lucky to have a friend for almost all of my life. I have a friend now who I feel is substandard. I've had much better than him. Making friends and keeping them has been very difficult for me. I felt like my social has been much better in past than now. I don't see it getting better in the future. Well, maybe, but I would have to be very lucky if I can have a good social life. I know that I do a very good job at sabotaging my possibilities for a great social life. I don't feel like getting out there to meet people and I prefer not to ask anyone out to join me for coffee, or something like that.

[CeliaA]

I’m an introvert. I don’t like to go out with friends and am uncomfortable talking long with them. Until I’m in my 40s and I realised that I cannot longer be a hermit. During one of the sermon, my pastor said if we want change we got to change ourself first and we have to make the first move. Now I’m in my 50s I’m still learning and growing up to make more friends!

[wiltedspinach]

I'm relatively new to the adult world (22) and neither I nor any of my friends have steady employment. It's great in that I know I'm not alone; it's terrible because there's really no one setting and example.

Recently I was fired from my awful part-time hosting job and I cannot even find another awful part-time food service position. It's been a real blow to the self esteem. Take heart that you're probably doing a better job than me!