Disabled and dependent

I was diagnosed with cancer at age 29 by age 35 I was on disability and could no longer live alone. Life changed a complete 180 degrees. I lost my job, relationships, ability to drive, ability to take day trips. Lost all independence which was and remains to be a very hard thing for me. My health continues to be a battle daily and life seems to be a spectator sport for me.

My sister and her family moved into my house which is basically the last thing I have left, but due to expanding their family it is no longer large enough for us all. We will need to leave my home which is in town and convenient to my parents, medical facilities and professionals and is in the metro. We are moving across state lines to an extremely rural area and I will be even more isolated.

This has all caused my depression and anxiety to skyrocket. I don’t want to leave my home, but I feel it would be unfair to demand we all stay when they take care of me. I can’t ask them to eliminate their future because I have lost mine. However, it has become a hard thing for me to wrap my head around. It feels like I am losing the very last thing that I haven’t yet lost due to my health.

I am not selling my house, but will rent it out. I don’t want to lose that security. Though from what I have read that can be a slippery thing being on disability. I don’t have the stamina to manage it myself anyway.

I am just having a hard time with all of this. I am from the city and will always be city at heart and I’ll be in the country with not even activity to watch down the street anymore. Illness makes everything so unfair, much more than I had ever imagined.

Thanks for listening to my rant.

Sincerely,

Sick with lack of options

Wow, Ozzy. I'm so sorry. I don't know that there's any good answers, but your situation seems really unfair.

Are you able to spend much time on the computer? (I'm thinking that connecting with folks online might be one way to help feel slightly less isolated - it's not the same, for sure, but it's got to be better than not talking to anyone at all.)

I'm not really a city person, but not a country person either... more like a suburbs person . I wouldn't enjoy living in a rural area either.

I'm sure you've looked into all this, but there's no way to get a caretaker through disability insurance? Someone who can help you stay in your home?

I've lived most of my adult life in cities of varying sizes... now in a large metropolitan area. But I grew up out in the country. I'd love to go back. But I'm too old now. I hope you will be able to find peace & contentment wherever you end up living...

I require 24/7 attendance which my sister and her family provide. I am on disability, but don’t qualify for the type of care you’re talking about because I don’t qualify for Medicaid. My primary policy would cover care but for 24/7 it would be a skilled nursing facility..which I am not doing at age 35 and from what I’ve seen of them probably never.