November is a bad month.

November is a bad month for my family (me). This month marks the 8th anniversary of my stepson's walking into eternity. My husband isn't handling it very well this year. SS was 31. Also, 7th anniversary of his dad's walking into eternity. He was 86. Today I have a saying on my whiteboard on my office door by Bob Marley "You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have". That's how I've lived my life for so many years. Strong b/c that's my only choice. My depression is pit deep right now and I'm clawing my way up as best I can. Anxiety is clamoring in my chest to get out. I think my Effexor has pooped out. Not sure. May have to have another med change. Lexapro pooped out after about 4 years. Seems like that may be how long my brain likes a particular kind. Sigh....I just needed to talk to someone and I have no one I can be real with so this is my only option. I don't come on here often, but I am so, so very thankful this place is here so I can share feelings that I can share no where else. Thanks for listening.

I’m sorry you are having a tough time. Please continue posting as it helps you. We care. ((((( Hugs )))))

Sorry to hear this. Please be gentle with yourself. When times are tough for me I try to do something special for myself such as some self-care. It also helps to create new traditions during tough times of the year. Maybe you could get your nails done or get a massage if you can afford it. If not you can do something like watch a favorite film.

((((yakmom)))) I'm sorry you're struggling. It's perfectly understandable you'd feel that way. Perhaps you can ask for a change of meds? Either way, we'll always be here for you, to listen to what you have to say. We care about you

Thank You all so much. I don't have anywhere else to get this out. Thank You.

((((gentle hugs))))

November and December are very hard for me.

I'm sorry november is so hard for you and your family.
((((hugs))))

My thoughts are with you and your family yakmom.

Much love and hugs to you

My thoughts are with you and I'm sending you much love

November's a tough month for me as well

Yes, anniversaries like that are very, very tough. Glad you have this outlet. When we are grieving, sometimes we don't want to burden the same people over and over yet, it can still weigh on your mind. This is a good place to come because people can support each other when they want to and are able to. I am sorry if your medications are giving out. Maybe you aren't sure because these anniversaries could be a major factor? Keep monitoring. I think posting here can be a way to monitor yourself. Hugs.

I wish there was some way I could make it better for you. You've had more than your share of agony. Many virtual hugs.

I'm sorry that you lost so much! I lost a lot of people in my life.

I completely agree with you!