[puzzclar]

Over the weekend I went camping. The pervious weeks I was sui, and losing a T. I stepped into a hole and rolled my ankle. It's been a bit more than 48 hours. No swelling, but putting weight on the ankle hurts like heck. Most likely a sprain, but still I am stuck inside, sitting down.

Camping was good up until that point. When a nerve cluster was blocked it was intense pain all the way down the leg making the ankle hurt worse. I was in tears, and in the middle of no where. Lucky for me I had medication for pain, and ice was found.

Since then it has impacted emotionally. Feeling pain all day long is too much and I just need to let it out. Being single sucks, also i feel like I am terrible at relationships. I need to improve, and find a life instead of wanting to die all the time. The biggest question is how do I create stronger relationships when I hate myself. I hate feeling depressed, I hate feeling so much pain (even if not self-inflicted). I hate feeling alone.

Camping helped me feel a bit more connected but I need to connect more.

[Breaking Dawn]

In some ways you sound like me, puzzclar, so I felt a lot while reading your story. I'm wishing really hard for you. Too much pain every day, but remaining strong. I believe in change, sometime ahead, so I refuse to give up & miss out on experiencing the change that I've earned. I hope your healing speeds up & you'll feel better soon.