Holiday depression

Does anyone Get really depressed on any kind of holiday?. Christmas, Halloween, Easter, what ever.


I personally find that they are worse than birthdays for me (in terms of depression)


I see them as milestones. Just as you grow older every year and reflect on the year gone, you do the same with the holidays.


Like, this time last Halloween, I wasn't doing anything with my life


Now we've had the complete circle, it's Halloween again., and I'm in the same old rut


That kind of thing

Hi @emily1890 - I hear you. Holidays for me always inferred that I should be with people and the way my life is I am not a party animal by any stretch of the imagination. So I am at the point where holiday expectations are about zero.

I still think of my parents from time to time. I wonder if my daughter will think of me when I am gone. Hopefully not too upset but I am surprised it means something to me to have someone think of me then.

What things happened for you around holidays that made them so toxic?

@CANDC

Yes, its really bad this year.

TRIGGER: I'm putting one foot in front of the other and surviving by over medicating myself so I sleep for days. I wish it was forever.

Yes. I also wish we could get rid of some of them. I think Thanksgiving per se is really outdated. Where most people today do not have the nuclear family I think it is outdated and nothing more than a day to make a whole lot of people feel bad.

Christmas was such a magical time when I was a kid I had no idea how anyone could be depressed. I saw a holiday postal service commercial about an hour ago and I felt panicked. I have a lot of family stuff going on right now and idk. Thanksgiving will be tough this year.

To me it's starting to look and feel like the holidays. And now the depression has started to make its way into me. The main reason why I have holiday depression is because it's supposed to be a joyous time, but instead, I'm just going to be alone, so it doesn't mean anything to me. It's been that way for a long time for me.

Lately I have been having memories on how nice the holidays were when I was much younger. It was with my original family. The family wasn't great when I was growing up, but it seemed like the holidays was a time when we'd emotionally bonded more with happiness; and put away our differences. When the holidays were over, it felt like the end of the world. Not just because the holidays were over, but because we'd be back to being emotionally separate with each other.

I'm retired now but back in the days when I was working it was the worst before the holidays. The constant questions of, "what will you being for the holidays? Will you be with your family"? And then they'd talk about great plans they will be having. Yea, that really makes me feel great about myself! I have my neighbors now but I hardly talk to them. So I guess that would mean less questions for me.

Also, I hate to sound like a "Scrooge", but I can't stand those superficial - "Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year" I get from store clerks and others.

I don't exactly get depressed, but I'm learning not to have a Norman Rockwell version of holidays. Try to enjoy what is---not want I wish it would be. Go out to have a Thanksgiving dinner--turkey and all that stuff; buy some gifts for needy children, since I don't have any at home anymore, etc. Listen to Christmas music; even watch those sappy Christmas movies and live through other people

We've had a Christmas Day gathering here at My Support Forums for the last several years--where people can get on a thread and visit; pretend to bring food, etc. Even gifts would be fun.

We could do that for Thanksgiving, too, if people are interested.

I get depressed severely every Christmas but this year I'm in a mixed episode I think. Be nice to be better at Christmas for once.

Holidays don't cause depression for me. They do make it desirable for me to isolate.

As of now I'm realizing that this Christmas, this time, is not going to be great. Probably even more so this time than in the past, when I've spent so many Holidays alone.

This Christmas I won't have a single friend. And then my sister had a fall last week and broke some bones on her arm. I called her last Thursday and she didn't sound good and was in a hurry to hang up on me. She said she'd call me the next day and, as of now, still hasn't called. She does that to me a lot and I get tired of it. Plus, when I call, it's always a bad time. So I don't like to reach out because I have a fear of rejection and it happens almost all of the time.

I remembered decades ago, when I was much younger, that during times when I'd be watching TV with my father, I'd sing along with the Christmas commercials I was happy back then. While I was singing, my father interrupted me by saying, "there are many who feel really bad at this time of year". I thought that he was such a downer and it was hard for me to believe how people can feel bad during the season. Now that I'm much older and alone, I know why.

I thought you had cut your sister out of your life but that was months ago, that I saw that thread or maybe longer.

Your dad sounded way more "in touch" or in tune with how things are for some people than mine.

Yeah, I really get it too. I'm well more aware of things like dysfunctional families, the ever widening gap between the haves and have nots, cultural expectations to have big plans, how commercialized and superficial our holidays are, how the pressure to shop can be too much, how the shorter days impact people's moods, etc.......while we have two wars going on and continue to get mass shootings like no other country does. But tis' the season right?

I swear it's a form of adult peer pressure: It's the holidays and you're supposed to be cheerful and be with family/friends. The ***** at the senior center who was processing my renewal insisted I "must" have somebody for my emergency contact. That was like pouring gasoline on a fire, for crying outloud.

To add insult to injury, I'm getting promotional emails from my credit union or bank or to complete a survey on the call with a representative. No emails, texts, or calls from anybody I want to hear from. Just marketing or scams, that's all the messages I get now.

I felt really good for Halloween. I had little candle-lit pumpkins and autumn decorations all over the place. My place looked nice. Patio was decorated. I was into the season and loving the fall weather.

Second week of November my happy mood collapsed. It's been collapsed all the way to now. I'm never like this a week before Christmas. I feel like I can't cope with anything. I was alone for the last 3 Christmases, and I managed okay, but this year I feel so much worse.

Just a couple of weeks, and it'll be a new year, and potential for a new start!

2023 was not a great year for me. Lots of disappointments, set-backs, and takeaways. Some good things happened but it was mostly a weird and not-so-great year.

That song "A Long December" by The Counting Crows comes to mind. Although I have been fortunate this year not to experience "the smell of hospitals".

One of my "metaphors" for the end of 2023, and hopefully going forward, is based on the song "Go West" by Pet Shop Boys. I'm going to try to live a life of peace, sun, and joy going forward.

Just 5 more days and it will be over. Even that Christmas thread at the top of the screen is back and this time there is NO "X" for me to click to CLOSE it for Pete's sake. The thread is on "ignore" yet still appears up there on every page......

Maybe it’s the expectations, the should be having fun/being happy/spending money/being a gourmet cook….. or sometimes it’s getting caught up in memories, or being out of routine. Working in food retail I can’t ignore it and the workload increase means it’s stressful often.

This year I have a very unwell friend who I can’t see and illness in my family too so emotionally there’s challenges, not made better by some people seemingly thinking I’ll just switch off and party.

People often don’t think before they speak unfortunately.

This may sound weird but lately I have trying to avoid my neighbors simply because I don't want to be asked what will I be doing or hear, "Merry Christmas". Hearing it makes me cringe. I feel bad for saying it. But yet it happened a couple of times. They just popped out of nowhere, to my surprise. I also want to avoid them because I'm afraid of being questioned as to what will I be doing. I don't talk to my neighbors anyways all along, so why now? And by saying, "Merry Christmas" to me, are they thinking they will score points with me? I know it's a nice gesture but I still don't understand it. And by the way, the two guys who said "Merry Christmas to me; I think they will be spending Christmas alone like I will.

The holidays can be a dreary time for many. It's either because of loneliness, illnesses, or having some tragedies to deal with. Sometimes tragedies happen around the holidays which makes it brutal. Well anyways, we'll try to get through this.