[itsDK]

Hi, I just joined this thread and I’ve suffering from depression and HORRIBLE anxiety. I need someone to talk to me, I need someone to tell me ways to get out of this…

Me and a long time love partner have been together for 5 years (we were highschool sweethearts) we have had our ups and downs in the past we’ve hurt each other but we’ve also loved each other to the fullest and made each other laugh and So happy at times. I truly do love this individual and see myself with her forever. Recently things haven’t felt the same and I made a stupid mistakes by talking to another person.

I hate myself everyday now for it and I did come clean and told her about it. I do want to be with her. She does make me happy but at times I feel like the spark starts to slowly burn out and then it doesn’t even feel like we are each others person. I know she is my soulmate, I know I messed up and made a mistake again. We’ve both seen other people behind each others backs and it took alot for us to get that back. I truly don’t know what to do without her. She’s left for a few days to think and left the dog we rescued. I love the dog too but if she decides to leave me for good and take the dog with her I will be crushed..

Also I don’t have suicidal thoughts or tendencies but I do have a problem looking and finding for the purpose of life. I feel like we all just go in a circle day in and day out and I wanna find the deeper meaning. Please if anyone has solutions to help me work on myself I would really appreciate it. Thank you.

[tornoversurgery]

DK, The pain of losing your first love is always one of the hardest to deal with, it sounds like it's still very fresh and you might still be in the middle of it. Take a little time to heal and clear the emotions taking over you heart & mind so you can look at it with just a little objectivity, so you can try to see if the relationship can be restored & salvaged, or if it is the first heartbreak in a long life of relationships with women.

It also seems that there was a pinch of infidelity going on, so I think you should look at that with a clear eye.

Either way it sounds like from what you say you are young, in your early 20's. There's a lot of life down the road for you, walk it well.