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mylife254
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Default May 27, 2008 at 12:02 PM
  #1
I'm sitting in bed when really i should be at school.I guess you could say that I've given up for the day. It's gotten to the point where nothing works. I've done the medication, the therapy, whatever. Month after month i hear the same thing, "things will get better." I don't think they will, i can't see anything changing.

Even though I'm slowly loosing hope, a part of me is longing for healing. I've tried the suicide, and I've done the cocaine use, those were my attempts of escaping.But now I'm done. I need a place to escape to, a hospital, i don't know. So i can get out of town, get fixed, and come back a new person. Right now that sounds like heaven. Maybe there isn't a place like that, I don't know, but if any of you know something close to the sorts please let me know. I am currently living in Oregon but travel doesn't matter, I am looking for a place anywhere.

just thought i'd share my thoughts and maybe some of you can relate.

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i've been struggling with depression since the end of october of last year and ever since then it's gotten worse. i've had a few emotional break downs, one suicide attempt, and experimental drug use. i feel like im in a hole that i havent been able to get out of. people around me say they'll get me help and that i'll get threw this but 7 months later and i havent made any progress.its discuriging.
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Fuzzybear
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Default May 27, 2008 at 12:37 PM
  #2
I'm not good at advice but keep hoping and keep posting, people here are very kind and many are very insightful i need to overcome

((((((((((( mylife254 )))))))))))))

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nowheretorun
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Default May 27, 2008 at 12:55 PM
  #3
hi mylife...

i started having those feelings at about 16? a long time ago anyway... i went thru several long term cycles of feeling that way.... doldrums with where i was, imagining something better.... needing something better...... wanting to know there was something better.... and day after day, cycle after cycle, the same thing...

after a really long time, i began to make some progress tho... its hard and seemingly endless work.... the gains are very small and come infrequently for some... depression rolls downhill fast... getting back uphill takes longer the farther down you've rolled, but the snowball effect works in both directions... once it begins to filter into place, the steps become relatively easier, the gains massively greater...

hang in there, never give up... always look for the light... even when it seems darkest, trust that there is a light somewhere and you can find it... sometimes its the form of a hopeful thing another says... sometimes it is a caring smile....

wishing you the best always...
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Christina86
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Default May 27, 2008 at 06:44 PM
  #4
(((((((((mylife))))))))))))

There are hospitals that you could probably go to get some help. Can you talk to your T/pdoc (which I assume you have since you said you've tried medication & therapy) and see what's closeby?

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