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#1
Jun 23, 2008, 01:50 PM
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Can't anyone see the pain
behind the smile the dread and fear needing to run a mile. I took off the scab to let me bleed to cure the bad so i'd be freed. What have i done where do i go i want to run i want to show how much i hurt but far too scared i feel like dirt i'm not prepared. cant do anything right everythings wrong i just cant fight amongst this throng we call life it drives me mad cuts like a knife i feel too sad. I just dont know what to do, no turning back, have to go forward, i feel ripped apart, dirty, angry, wrong, i feel like noone understands me at all ...... i feel scared that if i go back to how i was i'lllose my family, i just feel so desparate. i'm sorry. i dont know where my light went ...... i dont know what happened ..... i think i am going mad i just can't cope with anything at all.  
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#2
Jun 23, 2008, 01:55 PM
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(((((((((((((( jinny ))))))))))))))
 
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#3
Jun 23, 2008, 01:58 PM
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(((((((( Jinny ))))))))
I am sorry for your sadness. This is just a bump in the road. I know you feel as though you have taken steps back but you haven't. You are a good, strong person. You are an excellent mother. You are a great friend. I know it hurts and I wish that I could take all the pain away for you. Please know that I care and so many others do too. You matter a lot to us. We see you are hurting and if there is anyway I can help don't hesitate to say. You are a shining light and you will see that light again soon. Everyone falters off the path, and we will hold your hand and guide you back to that light.
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#4
Jun 23, 2008, 03:42 PM
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Jinny, how sad you are now, but it will pass and if you need to pm me please do so. it has helped me so much....puckyjan56.......xxoo
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#5
Jun 23, 2008, 03:50 PM
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you are all amazing friends to me I want to thank you. i'm so sorry i have been so angry and negative. I am just in such a bad place. i know i will come out of it, just,i feel worse than i have in a while, i have therapy tomorrow and i'm taking all the stuff i've posted with me ... my t analyses me so well. When i am really hurting i become aggressive and angry, i always have done, i try so hard not to but it's like there, on the surface... i have not learned control of my anger yet in therapy...somany flashbacks and dreams and even smells, music, allsorts right now .... i'm so glad i have you all because if i didn't where would i be?
love you, each one and thankyou Kerry xxxx
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#6
Jun 23, 2008, 07:58 PM
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((((((((((((( jinnyann ))))))))))))))))
__________________
 Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis visit my blog at http://gimmeice.psychcentral.net |
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#7
Jun 23, 2008, 09:39 PM
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(((((((((( Kerry )))))))))))) I'm sorry I have no words of wisdom for you, just words of truth and support. You are an amazingly beautiful and caring human being and I only wish I could support you the way you have supported me. All I can do is tell you how special you are, how much you mean to everyone here and that you DO matter. Through good or bad you ARE worth caring about. You may get tired of yourself or give up on yourself but I for one never will...and neither will lots of people here! Hope therapy goes well and helps you feel better.
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#8
Jun 23, 2008, 11:01 PM
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Kerry,
I'll hang on with you! When you don't need me here, I'll go bother someone else - ok? I think I do understand. I wish you could feel the support you give others, it's wonderful, and I hope you could feel that right now going out to you.... You are loved, Luv.... night
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I am larger and better than I thought. I did not know I held so much goodness. - Walt Whitman |
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