[katheryn]

christmas time has changed for me as i have grown from a motherless child into a parent,
ever since i can remember i have wanted christmas to be special something to look back on years later

i dont remember the early years as mum died when i was only about three leaving dad with us three to look after, first thing i remember about christmas is the letters not sure where this stook place but i rember writing to father christmas and posting letters up the chimney

one time when my dad and us lived with his sister and her family, i peeped out of my bedroom and saw somebody going upstairs with the pressies

later on i lived with another aunt on my own with her three children and her husband

i know she made our gifts a dolls cot for me and my cousin , something fr other cousin the boy and i remember standing in front of the christmas tree with our gifts having photo taken the boy cousin pushed me i landed on my cousins cot, i got in trouble and had to give mine to her

then next lot of memories are when we all got back togeather as a family living in a flat , comming up to christmas no decorations nothing not even a tree

so i somehow got my brother to go up the woods and get a holly tree i got paper crepe streemers and hung them up
decorated a piece of wood in wrapping paper and pinned christmas cards to it

thats was it ready, i also used to put socks on the fire place for the four of us with a orange and a few nuts, i must of pinched them from the shopping dad got

it wasnt till i had a home of my own that i tried even harder just to get it perfect the tree and decorations used to play a big part in it but so did the gifts and i used to go over the top

now as we are liminted in money i only have got a few again this year, as i now realsise the gifts didnt make christmas, being with my family on christmas day will make christmas

[cantstopcrying]

Kathy, mine is kind of the reverse of yours but ending up at the same conclusion. Growing up we definately weren't rich, but dad was a general foreman with General Motors, so we never struggled for money but we certainly weren't spoiled. Mom was a stay-at-home mom, always had homemade everything...clothes, bread, cookies, prom dresses. Christmas trees were always perfect, decorations were great, every year we got to go to Frankenmuth to pick out a christmas ornament. Very ideal. Very strong to try to live up to and I didn't. I work, I'm twice divorced and the girls and I struggle every day. This year I'll be doing Christmas on only my income and it's scaring me terribly. However, I've come to the realization that my girls don't care a whit about presents. They were excited that we got a good sized tree, we decorated it together, I turned Tori loose on the nativity scene (she loves setting that up), Kaity made cookies, we all decorated them, the girls set up the Christmas village, we hung the stockings. I know it will be hard on Christmas morning when there are only 3 or 4 presents each under the tree, I know it will. I also know they will be so happy for the gifts and even if they are disappointed (they are teenagers, after all) they will never let me see it. They know I am doing the best I can for them and I am so grateful they are the wonderful children that they are and that we are together.

Your childhood was so different from mine, Kathy, and so hard. I'm so sorry you had to go through all that, but you are such a caring and loving person and the things you went through helped form your resolve and caring. I'm so glad you still have the true meaning of Christmas!

(((kathy))))))))))))))) you have the true spirit of christmas...
Its being with the ones you love not the gifts
The gifts are our children, the ppl we love...
nothing ever can replace that. as you said.
Christmas is not even the tree as you said..
its not the dinner, or any of that....
Its about love for our family...
((very well put kathy))))))))))))))))
muffy