[littleyellowspider]

I am an identical twin. We are genetically identical but completely different and she makes me feel so horrible about myself.

I just talked to her on the phone and the whole time I felt so inferior she rambled on about how she has the lead in a one act at her college (I have auditioned for 4 one acts so far at my college and not gotten in to a single one) How this really hot guy is interested in her and she thinks another one might be too (My boyfriend and I just broke up not even a week ago, she didn't even ask about it) and various other things including how she was made vice president of RHA, the things she had done with all her millions of friends etc. etc. etc. It makes me SO frustrated! I don't understand how we can have identical DNA but she turned out so much better than me. She is everything that I'm not, she is incredibly pretty (and I know people are just thinking we are identical twins we look exactly the same. we really don't at all. she is WAY prettier and I have had several people tell me this) She is so talented, good at everything, she is social, she has a lot of friends, she is incredibly thin (and has never even been on a diet in her life) She is smart, people love her.

I just do not understand why I am not like that. We are TWINS I should be like her! But I'm not, I am ugly, I don't do well in school, I am worthless and have no accomplishments or talents, I have very few friends. No one likes me. I can't do anything.

I just don't get how we were raised by the same people, grew up in the same house, had the same experiences, did the same things but she turned out so wonderfully and I turned out like this. What is wrong with me? Why do I mess everything up? She just shows that I brought my problems upon myself because we come from the same things and she is happy and I'm not. I don't know why that is.

That's the big difference. She is HAPPY. Why aren't I?? That's all I want. I just want to stop being so incredibly depressed every day and just be happy. People tell me happiness won't come from being pretty or talented or smart but it's hard for me to believe them when I look at girls like my sister and the people at school who have these things and they are the people who are really happy. I know they all have problems and I know their lives aren't perfect but they are happy. And that's all I want.

Twins are a genetic mutation. They are something that isn't supposed to happen but does. I often feel like I am someone who wasn't supposed to happen. One time I was talking to a friend who had recently found out her mother had become pregnant with her by accident. During the conversation she told me that when you think about it I had kind of been born by accident too. I told her this wasn't true, my mother had planned to get pregnant but she replied "Yeah, but your mum only planned to get pregnant with ONE baby, she didn't plan for you" This is something that has stuck with me for a while now. I have always felt like I was just an add on to my sister, people hung out with me because they wanted her and I came along. Jessie was born first and I just came along with her. My older sister (not the twin but an older one) once commented that I was like the "free gift with purchase" you get at clinique. You'll use it because it was free but you only got it because it came along with the thing you really wanted. You wouldn't have been interested otherwise.


Sorry for the long post. I just needed a rant.

[Puffyprue]

((((((((((((littleyellowspider))))))))
i dont have sweet words right now, but i have friends they also twins and i talked to them it almost same situation with u ...guess what they feel jelous to eachother i mean maybe you feel jelous to ur twins but maybe she feels that way too about you ...i dont know excatly how the situation with both of you but maybe better if you both talk maybe it will helps ..
sorry for the situation hugs for you

[lifelesstraveled]

Originally Posted by littleyellowspider

I am an identical twin. We are genetically identical but completely different and she makes me feel so horrible about myself.

I just talked to her on the phone and the whole time I felt so inferior she rambled on about how she has the lead in a one act at her college (I have auditioned for 4 one acts so far at my college and not gotten in to a single one) How this really hot guy is interested in her and she thinks another one might be too (My boyfriend and I just broke up not even a week ago, she didn't even ask about it) and various other things including how she was made vice president of RHA, the things she had done with all her millions of friends etc. etc. etc. It makes me SO frustrated! I don't understand how we can have identical DNA but she turned out so much better than me. She is everything that I'm not, she is incredibly pretty (and I know people are just thinking we are identical twins we look exactly the same. we really don't at all. she is WAY prettier and I have had several people tell me this) She is so talented, good at everything, she is social, she has a lot of friends, she is incredibly thin (and has never even been on a diet in her life) She is smart, people love her.

I just do not understand why I am not like that. We are TWINS I should be like her! But I'm not, I am ugly, I don't do well in school, I am worthless and have no accomplishments or talents, I have very few friends. No one likes me. I can't do anything.

I just don't get how we were raised by the same people, grew up in the same house, had the same experiences, did the same things but she turned out so wonderfully and I turned out like this. What is wrong with me? Why do I mess everything up? She just shows that I brought my problems upon myself because we come from the same things and she is happy and I'm not. I don't know why that is.

That's the big difference. She is HAPPY. Why aren't I?? That's all I want. I just want to stop being so incredibly depressed every day and just be happy. People tell me happiness won't come from being pretty or talented or smart but it's hard for me to believe them when I look at girls like my sister and the people at school who have these things and they are the people who are really happy. I know they all have problems and I know their lives aren't perfect but they are happy. And that's all I want.

Twins are a genetic mutation. They are something that isn't supposed to happen but does. I often feel like I am someone who wasn't supposed to happen. One time I was talking to a friend who had recently found out her mother had become pregnant with her by accident. During the conversation she told me that when you think about it I had kind of been born by accident too. I told her this wasn't true, my mother had planned to get pregnant but she replied "Yeah, but your mum only planned to get pregnant with ONE baby, she didn't plan for you" This is something that has stuck with me for a while now. I have always felt like I was just an add on to my sister, people hung out with me because they wanted her and I came along. Jessie was born first and I just came along with her. My older sister (not the twin but an older one) once commented that I was like the "free gift with purchase" you get at clinique. You'll use it because it was free but you only got it because it came along with the thing you really wanted. You wouldn't have been interested otherwise.


Sorry for the long post. I just needed a rant.

(((LYS)))

First, I am a twin TOO!!! and I am the younger one. Are we identical? I have no clue. But, is there a small part of you that can be proud of your sister? I am sure she works very hard to be successful...that's not to say that you don't. But stop comparing yourself to her, please. I used to be EXACTLY like you. I constantly compared myself. I felt like everyone liked my sister more than me and only hung around me because I was always with my sister. She ALWAYS had people wanting to be her friend and I was kind of the tag along. I always always felt so different from her and wondered why people flocked to her and not me; and although I had neglectful parents, she was SLIGHTLY favored by them as well. And I constantly beat myself up over this. Constantly feeling like i was defective and unwanted and I still do, and will probably take some time for me not to think this way.

Long story short, it's not you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you and you can and will be happy. Please don't consider yourself "free gift with purchase". Please stop thinking of yourself as an accident and stop focusing so much on what your sister is doing with her life and focus on yours and get better. Focusing so much on her life will only make the depression worse, will only make you feel worse about yourself. I know it's hard to do, trust me I KNOW. Are you seeing a therapist? Or a counselor at your school?