[trevorzero]

Every now and then, when I'm at work and someone asks how I'm doing, I reply that I'm suicidal. I don't cry or moan when I say it, but I don't smile or wink at them, either.

They always just laugh. There is no way that they can't realize that I'm chronically depressed, because that is my consistent demeanor. They just don't want to deal with it for even one minute. I've known some of these people for several years and my importance to them is nonexistent.

Out there in the real world, if someone says that they are suicidal, even if you can't be positive if they are joking or not -- don't just laugh at them. (Hopefully none of you here would ever do such an insensitive thing.)

[justfloating]

I agree, it is insensitive to laugh at someone when they say they're suicidal. But in your coworkers' defence, sometimes people laugh when they are uncomfortable or unsure of themselves, and when someone tells them that they're suicidal, most people have absolutely no idea what to do with that information. I'm not saying that laughing is appropriate at all, I'm just trying to point out that they might not be laughing at you so much as in reaction to their own insecurity with the mention of suicide. A lot of peope have difficulties with topics like death, suicide or illness, so when they laugh, it's probably not personal. And if it is personal ... well, they are indecent and insensitive and should be overlooked as completely ignorant.

Lots of hugs.

[bearchic34]

If you have been consistantly like this perhaps they don't know you are depressed, they think this is just you. Perhaps they think you are being scarcastic? They can not know whats going on with in your head? Why are you saying this to people? I mean I hope and pray you are getting help so this isn't truly an issue anymore. So very scary. If you don't like the response you get how about don't answer it that way anymore. I am sure you are a topic of conversation between your co workers to try and figure out if you are serious or not...........
Good luck

[deliquesce]

this is just my opinion, but if you aren't saying it like you are serious - then how do your coworkers know to respond appropriately? people say things like this all the time in the work place:

- i'm gonna kill myself if friday doesn't hurry up and come already
- i'm gonna kill (coworker Bill) the next time he....
- i wanna shoot myself in the head life sucks so much
etc.

people laugh at this all the time. people usually interpret it as letting off steam, they don't take it as something serious (e.g., they don't go alert coworker Bill).

i typically don't bring my illness into the workplace (apart from alerting my boss, should i need time off, or adjustments to be made). something like suicide is such a big and scary issue for most people, that even the people who love you most may not respond appropriately. i take my suicidal thoughts and feelings to my dr and therapist, and sometimes if i really need extra support, i will tell a few of my friends, who are well briefed in how my illness effects me and who also know how to support me.

[turquoisesea]

it IS insensitive, but it also doesn't necessarily mean your coworkers don't care for you.

[jacq10]

I'm sorry you are feeling as though no one cares for you. I would just like to say though, that the majority of the population doesn't directly deal with extremes in mood or suicidal ideations. And while it may seem as though they are being insensitive they might either a) not realise you are being serious b) feel uncomfortable and their laugh is a reflection of this, or c) Not know what to do.

Also, it depends on how close you are with them. If these coworkers of yours are intimate friends that you share details with, and they laughed when you said you were suicidal... well then that is a little scary. But if these people are more so acquaintances then close friends, then chances are, they don't know a whole lot about you... and in that case, you can't really expect them to look into this a whole lot. They're probably not on the lookout for you to be talking about things with this degree of magnitude with them if you've never had similar conversations before.

If you feel as though you need to talk with one of them about it though, maybe you could bring it up in a different way.

[trevorzero]

Thanks for all your replies and you all make good sense. My feeling is that the co-workers do realize that I'm serious in what I say, and they choose not to invest anything of themselves in my situation. But it is true that they all can be categorized as acquaintances, even after my having known them for three years. Acquaintances are all that they will ever be.

[madisgram]

Originally Posted by trevorzero

Thanks for all your replies and you all make good sense. My feeling is that the co-workers do realize that I'm serious in what I say, and they choose not to invest anything of themselves in my situation. But it is true that they all can be categorized as acquaintances, even after my having known them for three years. Acquaintances are all that they will ever be.

is there someone you trust that you can talk about your feelings with? i find, jme, that it helps to disperse the feelings of hopelessness and takes away some of it's power when i can reveal my thoughts to someone i know cares about me. in my case, trevorzero, you are one of the ppl i trust. i know i can come to you and you will treat me with respect about my feelings. is there someone like you that you can turn to?

[kebsfroggy]

As a frog of little brain, even I would say they are not your friends. True friends are not easy to find.

In defence of the general public, the laughter is a nervous response by people who don't understand or can't cope with the information.

Unfortunately, depression is an illness not easily understood. People would rather turn away than to offer a helping hand.

((((( trevorzero )))))

[clover899]

Originally Posted by trevorzero

Every now and then, when I'm at work and someone asks how I'm doing, I reply that I'm suicidal. I don't cry or moan when I say it, but I don't smile or wink at them, either.

They always just laugh. There is no way that they can't realize that I'm chronically depressed, because that is my consistent demeanor. They just don't want to deal with it for even one minute. I've known some of these people for several years and my importance to them is nonexistent.

Out there in the real world, if someone says that they are suicidal, even if you can't be positive if they are joking or not -- don't just laugh at them. (Hopefully none of you here would ever do such an insensitive thing.)

i would feel bad too, but think from their point of view too..maybe they were uncomfortable with that idea? Maybe they are just not insightful...many people aren't

[trevorzero]

Originally Posted by madisgram

is there someone you trust that you can talk about your feelings with? i find, jme, that it helps to disperse the feelings of hopelessness and takes away some of it's power when i can reveal my thoughts to someone i know cares about me. in my case, trevorzero, you are one of the ppl i trust. i know i can come to you and you will treat me with respect about my feelings. is there someone like you that you can turn to?

Thanks for asking, Madisgram, but there really isn't anyone I can "confess" my feelings to, at least not in the real world. No one has the need for me to be in their lives, which I can perfectly understand. I am quite useless to them.

I do get that talking or hinting about suicide certainly does make people feel uncomfortable. However, if someone whom I had been acquainted with for several years made any mention of suicide, I definitely would take it seriously and I definitely would not laugh at them.