[misty]

my mother has alzhimers. She brings up things that trigger some times. I want to just say to her how I feel yet can not. Prbly good that I can't but not sure what to do with anger.

[RhysMadison]

With alzheimers (had to look up how to spell it) one must remember that the person's mind is not as it used to be. Telling her probably won't help as she can't focus on the present. Depending on which stage she's in. I know most tend to think it's the past. I don't know if you get along w/ her or not. If you do, you could limit your time, just being there to bring you both comfort. If you don't get along w/ her, then don't see her. Don't put yourself in the situation where you will be triggered. I know that sounds harsh. But w/ alz. esp. the person can't control what they're saying.
Do what you think is best for you. Maybe try a support group for alz. family members either locally or online & see how others handle dealing w/ this.
Best of luck.
Love,
RhysMadison

[Mahali]

Skylrks,
I don't have any great magical cure. I really wish I did to help you. I agree completely with what RhysMadison said about alzheimers. I know there are support groups.

What a hard situation to be in. I am sorry.

Take great care and make sure you stay safe.

Know we are thinking of you and are here if needed.

place

[wanttoheal]

((((((((((((((skylrks)))))))))))))))) Take good care. Sending you best wishes through this.

not sure what to do with anger.......

that's what you had at the end of your post. There are many answers to that. Finding the one that fits your system/family/circles best is another matter.

I do think that finding support groups for those with loved ones with alzheimers would help. I tend to do better when I know I'm not the only one feeling some strange way and support groups are wonderful in helping smash those feelings of being isolated and alone with this.

You're not the first person to feel as you do about this situation and you won't be the last. I have no doubt that there are ppl with similar anger issues from abuse who have loved ones facing alzheimers.

My ideas? Find support about the disease so that you can 'normalize' your feelings about what this brings up and how her disease is affecting you. And as for the anger......

I'll leave that up to you if you want to discuss some ways of handling anger. I know there are some threads on this board that broach anger and ways of managing that could be found with the search function. You could also be a bit more specific here if you wanted about what kind of anger you are feeling, how intense is it, have you experienced this type of anger before, etc.

I know that writing letters that do not get delivered or read to the person they are written for can be difficult to write but soooooooo helpful in getting the stuff out or at least moving it forward a bit.

Write a letter here to your mother about how you feel. Write it to someone trusted in PM. Write it in e-mail. Write it in huge angry letters in a notebook taking as much space per page with each angry word.

This is what happens when the cap is left off of __zh like leaving the cap off the toothpaste........I ooze out and am gloppy with my thinking

gl

with care,

[misty]

Want to thank you all for your responces. I really do appreciate your suggestions, ideas and support.
Not sure how long it's been since I've been here but it feels like forever. Feeling real scattered so many words going on in my head just trying to come back and it is so hard.

[Mahali]

skylrks,

Keep posting and try staying focused if you can. Easier said than done I know. Please if you want to talk pm.

Take care.

place