going down hill fast not good stuffeds..........

dotn quite unnerstand why things keeps goign down hill spiral rite now but everythign gettgin worser not gooder.....
life on the homefront is shakey and tense,,,,,,,,,,llike walkin on eggshells to put it mildly and dotn think we can keep this up much longer...
therapy is difficult too T has made a crisis interbention plan for us should we end up back in the hospital agains and apparently he thinks we is headed that direction cuz he sent us 2 emails about it this morning and what we is supposed ta have writtne on a peice of paper an keep with us wherever we is so that hospitals ppls can read it and get the write info. don will be very very angry if this happen
flashbacks are so often and sleep is full of nitemares when we is able t sleep at all
+ supposed ta do a important art & craft show tomorrow grrrrrrrrrrrrr happy happy joy joy NOT dotn feel like doing this either but have to beads is broke

they say when it rains it pours well, when it storms it never sems to end

beads feel scared, angry sad and nervous all at the same time but cannot let nuthing out
mary susan & all

((((mary susan and all))))

if ok

(((((mary susan and all)))))

((((((( beadlady and all ))))))))

It is a good thing that your T has done a crisis plan, that means that the hospital will know what to do and won't do anything that isn't needed. They will listen to your T's instructions. Let's hope that it won't be needed.

I hope your craft thing goes well tomorrow. Thinking of you.

Sending you strength and courage to get through your show tomorrow ... and much success. I'm sorry that you have to do it, so hard to have to push on like that. Take care of yourself in the best way you can. if safe

(((((((((All the Beads))))))))))))))))))))
We are sorry to hear you are not doing so well!
Sending you all all the love and support we can!
(Dance)Erik

(((Mary and all)))
I know all about walking on eggshells....that is such a bad feeling! I will say a prayer for you tonight! You don't ever have to walk on eggshells here Mary. This is your safe place. Good luck tomorrow!!

((((((((((((((( Mary Susan and all )))))))))))))))

(((Mary, Susan & all Beads)))

We will be thinking of you and sending positive thought your way.
Please be safe.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Lost, Miri, Manda, Pegasus, Susan, Furry Paws, Eriks, Calista}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Thank you all so much for your support!!!!!!! Yes, Yes, Yes......hugs IS okay and welcomed as pc definitely IS a safe refuge; one of the few places we has to go where it is SAFE with bear bear and all that is in our heart.
Thanks for helping beads to see that the crisis plan that T maked is a good thing & not something to be scared of.
The art show was very HOT but we met a lotta peoples and maybe made a few good bus. contacts. So reckon it WAS a good thing to go. After when we got home d went swimming at a nearby lake which left us with 'boo time'!
We got a welcome phone call from jewels & slept with the radio on underneath the ceiling fan in the bedroom in our new trailer. It dont really feel like home yet cuz still boxes all over the place to be unpacked. And that which has already been unpacked we cant seem to remember where we put it yet not even in the kitchen ( or should beads say especially in the kitchen!)
We even go in the wrong direction towards the bathroom, etc...... Silly huh?
hopefully as we gets more unpacked and find the floor we will has more time to spend here like we likes to. Beads miss talking to ye all very much and hope to be around more offen soon!

d will be makeing a trip downhome soon ( not exactly sujre when yet ) which will leave me and boo to our own devices for a while kinda scared about it hope it will all be okay

love, hugs, & teddy bears!!!!!

(((((((((((((((beads)))))))))))))))) I'm so glad the show went okay today and you were able to get some business contacts. And great that you were able to have some down time afterward. I do so much better when I have that down time.

Please take gentle care during this time. We want to support you.

(((((((((((((((((((((((beads))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am glad your show went well. I am thinking of you.

BB

((((((((((( Beads )))))))))))))

H

wow! that is amazing that your show went so well.

hope you will be able to check back, thinking of you


twilight

(((Beads))) You are amazing! Your show went so well even though you feel so bad. The crisis plan with T IS a good thing. We all want you to be safe and feel cared for.

((((((((((((((((( beads and all )))))))))))))))))

mary we been tellin u u can stay wif us an bring boo with u...we hadda give cricket back cuz she bit someone an u cant have a therapy dog that bites...so she is goin back tomorrow...so u comin with boo would give Myriam a little hope of what's ta come after the snow is gone...i told her we MIGHT be gettin anothr dog but she is so fired up ta get one right away an she dont understand that she needs time ta process cricket's leavin...she spent last night in tears an huggin cricket, an took her ta bed with her...i hate so much seein her in pain it just breaks my heart...an guess what...we r movin up to the townhouse neway cuz its LOTS bigger an if d can wait til october then ull have a room all ta urself...AND we need alla the boxes u can give us...we will come down periodically an take some home with us whenever u get em empty...so know that u r welcome ta come up here an stay the entire time d is away iffn u wanna...u know we will take good care of u...cuz we love u...

(((((((((((((wanttoheal, bb, iamtwilight, hunny, Calista, Fuzzybear, Jewels))))))))))))))
Gentle hugs & Thanks to ALL of you!!!!!!!!!!!
Guess What??!! our beadroom is unpacked and useable now! yay!!!!!!!
that should help alot! we arranged it so that our back is to the wall and we can see the doorway from where we sets & sews or works on beadwork which definitely makes a big difference on the feeling safe thing. We are going to the food pantry today gets a few groceries good because we needs all the help we can get in that respect this month brooooooooooookkkkkkkeeeee
Jewels we are so sorry to hear that you is having to send cricket back
gf that must be soooooooooooooo hard!!!!!!!!! we is cry with you a bit sorry but cant help it. it is hard to beleive that happened cuz cricket was so good to beads when we come up she sleep with us & everything just like boo does. beads can unnerstand how hard it is for myriam too. And that her don't quite get that it will be gooder iffen you both have a time to 'grieve' cricket before jumping in & get another. we is sure that you can help her to unnerstand tho cuz you are sooooooooo good with her. She really is a great young lady! we is happy ofr you that you will be getting the townhouse! you will have more room & your own washer & dryer too right? that should be much nicer!. we is fixing ta go to the food pantry rite now but give us a call we have some boxes saved for you in the back of d's truck. There ain't a hole bunch because a lot of them was banana boxes that could not be broken down but we saved the ones what could be. You & myriam are most welcome to come down anytime to get them & hopefully visit for a day with us too. It is supposed to be cool tomorrow and beads is gonna bake a apple pie tonite (acrdc gived don this coupon book to get some produce at the farmers market cuz he is over 60 years old so we got some apples to make him a pie its his favorite) after when it cools down some. So anyway point being like tomorrow mite be a good day to come down cuz you would not have to worry about the heat (me thinks Sunday ain't supposed to be bad either which would also work) please call beads TODAY an let us know......i know you must be's really hurting inside maybe a visit would help THAT too u know how much boo loves you & myriam and beads does too! our heart goes out to ya big time!. just remember that God has a greater plan and He knows what He is doing ... try to hang on to hope for gooder tomorrows & know that God is walking with you both holding you close...beads is keep you & myriam close to her heart and in special prayers !!!
we gotsa go now so we can get to the cable office and the food pantry but will take cell with us in case you call.
beads send her best to EVERYONE hear and please know that we appreciate and cares much for all or you. this IS our safe place and beads love you all sooooooooooo much!. maybe we will get a chance to work on beadwork later on this after noon hope so ayway.
xxx
all of us beadys

((((((((((((((((( beads )))))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((((( beads ))))))))))))))))
how is it going?

its goin good as can be expected reckon.......
pretty much most of the way unpoacked alth there is still quite a few boxes around still keep running in to them and stubbing our toes....ouch..
still broke......some things NEVER change
had a really difficult session in therapy today cuz we went back to one of them dark dark places we does not like to go...did not go into a hole lotta detail but apparently it was enuf to stir the pot in her head because the rest of this day has proved to be extra difficult to get thru
T is haveing surgery done tho tomorrow so will not have to do that again for acouple of weeks which should be a sigh of releif that do not but instead we is just scrared for T and hope he comes back and worried iffen something bad hapen while he is out that will have no one to talk to or even email about it grrrrrrrrrr......we will manage somehow not sure how but we always do by the skin oof our teeth and the seat of her pants methinks
anyway today is the first tiem we has been on the puter at all in over two weeks weve got a lot of catching up to do

((((((((beads))))))))

{hugs for all}

(((BEADS)))

((((((((((((((((((((beads)))))))))))))))))) So glad you stopped in to let us know how you are doing. Know I am here by your side. I am sorry you are feeling vulnerable with your t having surgery. Is there someone you can check with just to be reassured that he is ok?

I'm here.

BB