[Miracle1986]

So... last night, Sarah was out and my husband called. She answered the phone. They didn't talk for long (maybe 2 minutes or so).

Today, I was looking through my call history and noticed that he called.

I asked if he called and he said, "Yes I did... don't you remember?"

I told him that he must have not talked to me because I don't remember talking to him.
That's when I asked around to find out who had talked to him and found out it was Sarah.

He said, "I really thought it was you." I assured him I didn't talk to him last night.

Then he said something that surprised the hell out of me. "Well I think they are all you, and the way I see outside your head and I just see you so..."

Now I am confused... are they all really me? And if they are, why the different names and personalities? Also, how can a male be me?
(Thomas... husband doesn't know about him yet)

Arrrgh... I am so confused!!!

[Eriksplus]

Originally Posted by Manda86

So... last night, Sarah was out and my husband called. She answered the phone. They didn't talk for long (maybe 2 minutes or so).

Today, I was looking through my call history and noticed that he called.

I asked if he called and he said, "Yes I did... don't you remember?"

I told him that he must have not talked to me because I don't remember talking to him.
That's when I asked around to find out who had talked to him and found out it was Sarah.

He said, "I really thought it was you." I assured him I didn't talk to him last night.

Then he said something that surprised the hell out of me. "Well I think they are all you, and the way I see outside your head and I just see you so..."

Now I am confused... are they all really me? And if they are, why the different names and personalities? Also, how can a male be me?
(Thomas... husband doesn't know about him yet)

Arrrgh... I am so confused!!!

Experts in DID say that the others inside are in fact you...But we don't belive that bull crap!! it pisses us off!!
Huggies!
(Yeston)Erik

[Miracle1986]

Originally Posted by Eriksplus

Experts in DID say that the others inside are in fact you...

but... how can that be? Their personalities are so different and the LOOK different too!

That's why we hardly ever look in mirrors *just saying the word makes us shudder* because I don't see me when others are out... I see THEM!

I told my husband this, and he said, "Well you should look in one and tell them you want to see yourself and not them"

I told him I have tried that... it just doesn't work.

He said, "try harder to look past them, ok, tell them to move back so you can see yourself."

IT'S JUST NOT THAT EASY!!!! I wish it was, but it's not.

[Eriksplus]

As I said it's bull!
(Yeston)Erik

All branches from the same tree, can be very different, but in the end are all part of the same whole.

That's how I see it at least.

[Eriksplus]

Originally Posted by Kaika

All branches from the same tree, can be very different, but in the end are all part of the same whole.

That's how I see it at least.

I'm sorry, but I disagree.
(Webber)Erik

Can mod let me know if it's ok to post a helpful site for significant others to understand?

[bipolar_bear]

Calista; I guess it depends on the site as I am not sure which one you are speaking of. If you want to send me the link first I can look at it. It can not be a site promoting a commercial service, book etc. Thanks for asking.

BB

[Luce]

Manda, recent research suggests that dissociative disorders of identity are caused not by 'splitting' as such, but by the lack of integration within a normally developing personality. Meaning - that everyone's personality is 'fragmented' to a degree at birth, and the normal course of development 'integrates' these fragmented parts into one cohesive concept of self. In dissociative disorders of of identity the child doesn't have enough of the experiences to integrate the personality, and it remains fragmented... with each part having its own sense of 'I'.
Read up about *structural dissociation* sometime - it's fascinating.

I got permission from Sabby to post this. My husband found it helpful in understanding some of the daily living with a spouse with DID. I hope it helps.

http://www.op.net/~jeffv/so1.htm

Sorry I tried to post on resources but that thread is closed.
If this is not ok, please tell me.

[Miracle1986]

Originally Posted by Calista+12

Sorry I tried to post on resources

You did... it's there too!!!

[multipixie9]

Wow we read the stuff written by the s.o. of someone who was d.i.d. it was like reading about a wonderful fantasy marriage where a husband actually believed his wife and tried to help her and be there. Never had anything like that. The last time I went to hospital (and did discover they just warehouse you until you get stablized) I stayed up all night - while feeling terribly suicidal to do the family laundry so they will not hate me for going to the hospital. I almost had to call a taxi to get there as my spouse did not want to help me. Forgive me for complaining but this hurts me that no one in my life has almost every helped me. I helped others and it never went both ways. Sorry for the self-pity, but I feel so hurt that I've had to beg for any help. My recovery has been taking so much longer because we do not feel able to be who we are when s.o. is home. It stinks. grrrr.

[Miracle1986]

(((((Leslie)))))
I am so sorry about your situation. I did not mean to trigger anything for you by posting. I hope you know that. We love you!!!

(((Leslie)))
I'm sorry you have no support from your so. That makes it so much harder. Sometimes I do have upport, sometimes I don't. When we had been married a while, he seemed to look at me as a problem of his...something that drained HIM. It got so hurtful.
Sorry if that link triggered.

[multipixie9]

Manda and Calista,

You did not trigger me in any way. I am totally responsible for what I read and how I react to it. I just hurt so much to live with someone who is supposed to be my closest and dearest person and not be able to tell him what is happening in my life. It just makes it so lonely and unsafe in my own home. It blocks things from coming up and being dealt with.

Thanks for being here with me. This place and you all mean a lot to me and my alts.

Leslie/Pixies

((( LESLIE & PIXIES)))

frum baby

[Miracle1986]

I am so... GRRR right now!
Texted Manda's husband something this morning... don't even remember about what.
But he called me Manda. I texted him back and told him I wasn't Manda... I was Sarah.
He said, "Well you're still Manda to me, so ha!" What the hell dude?
We thought he knew and understood about us... now we're not sure.
Grrr... sometimes he just pisses us off!

A very frustrated and pissed off Sarah (NOT Manda!!!)

[multipixie9]

Manda/Sarah,

I am sorry your husband doesn't really seem to "get it". It is so frustrating to be misunderstood or called by someone else's name.

We just can't get other's to see more or understand more than they are able to do. It hurts.

I don't think they do it to be mean, they just don't see what it is like to be like you and me and all our alts.

Go slow and I think your husband will eventually understand it better. At least he is not against it or denies it exists.

Calista,

Tell BABY thank you for her kindness to Leslie and Her Pixies. We love the color purple and we feel warm inside that she wrote to us!

Leslie/Pixies