[peaches100]

Do you ever get into the child self and say things to your t that you feel really surprised and/or embarrassed about later? If so, how do you handle that?

i feel so strongly that i need to let the hurt child speak. But i keep such a tight rein on her for fear she will say something wrong/dumb/embarrassing.

it's rare when i can express things from that part of me because of fear and shame.

even when the child does talk and my t is accepting/soothing, later i feel afraid that i said something or did something wrong.

i think it comes from when i was a little girl and my dad always criticized or made fun of my feelings.

i don't know how to stop being scared about it.

[anderson]

(((((peaches100)))))))
There are times that we are still embarresed. But when you think about the fact that part of you does not know about safety and sercurity. maybe that is what making you feel so much. Our younger parts do not have a pritty story to tell. Yes some of us do have the perfect part that was acceptable in public. but for those that truly carry our pain it is not only hard on them to speak the truth but on the aduilt that still may have a part of themselves that do not want to admitt to some things. As a friend once told me get a cat, a dog, or even a teddy bear name it "innecent" love it and accept it and grow up strong.

[Hunny]

Peaches,

Not feeling so embarrassed now but there was a season that as I walked out the door or later at home my eyes would roll and I would feel disdain but that is where the problem lay for me. I didn't want to talk to the little parts, the medium parts or the other big parts because that would mean I had to come out of denial and begin to address the whole of The Hive. I have since learned that is the whole point. Talking amongst my parts or if they don't speak then taking an action like offering a stuffie, taking to some gentle time together etc.

Peaches please be patient with yourself. You are moving forward establishing trust with your therapist and amongst yourself. That doesn't mean 'stop' going forward and working as best as you can, it just means the process can be excruciatingly long and other times it is like hmmm this is too fast. Do keep yourself safe and have some fun times.

Hunny

Originally Posted by peaches100

Do you ever get into the child self and say things to your t that you feel really surprised and/or embarrassed about later? If so, how do you handle that?

i feel so strongly that i need to let the hurt child speak. But i keep such a tight rein on her for fear she will say something wrong/dumb/embarrassing.

it's rare when i can express things from that part of me because of fear and shame.

even when the child does talk and my t is accepting/soothing, later i feel afraid that i said something or did something wrong.

i think it comes from when i was a little girl and my dad always criticized or made fun of my feelings.

i don't know how to stop being scared about it.