we never asked for all this & hurts,

[Elysium]

I'm at work right now...but I hear you and I'm listening. I'm sorry you are hurting so badly. I hope you will allow yourself to share more with is. Of you don't want to share on open forum you can always PM me.

[anderson]

((((Fenrir))))
The pain within hurts us all. Please know that we are here for you even as we work within as well.

[Hunny]

(((((( Fenrir ))))))


Thank you for reaching out.

Hunny

Originally Posted by Fenrir

we never asked for all this & hurts,

Sorry and thanks everyone. Just having a rough time. Too much going on in my life, can't focus, everything gets foggy, can't sort stuff out I hate this. I hate feeling so messed up and chaotic and not whole, like a freak or outcast or burden. Too fragmented and broken to be something whole or coherent or normal. Broken up. Trying to focus on good stuff but too much going on. Trying though. Really am.

[michelle421]

i'm sorry you are having a hard time. i hope you can stay strong and hang in there! i think you are wonderful just the way you are, and i hope you can keep on going even when things are so hard.

~~~sending you positive, healing energy~~~

[Hunny]

Fenrir, sometimes the dates just are so hard to manage. Like statues to some torturous god, they demand our attention. There are just so many justified reasons to be feeling these feelings.

I come alongside gently and safely and together with others here, we shall climb out of this 'pit of despair' we find ourself in.

Please know you stuggle, not alone and if you are a freak, so am I and many here. Extending a safe friendly handshake to each other, pulling each other along to some greater good.

Hunny

Originally Posted by Fenrir

Sorry and thanks everyone. Just having a rough time. Too much going on in my life, can't focus, everything gets foggy, can't sort stuff out I hate this. I hate feeling so messed up and chaotic and not whole, like a freak or outcast or burden. Too fragmented and broken to be something whole or coherent or normal. Broken up. Trying to focus on good stuff but too much going on. Trying though. Really am.

[butterflykisses]

Hi. I have been on a journey of healing with my DID. Please know AND believe that it will get better. I am very sorry you are hurting right now. There is hope. Believe that. Believe in yourself and the reason you have a dissociative disorder...your dissociative states (commonly called Alters) helped you SURVIVE. Please try to be gentle with yourself. If you would like to pm me, you may at any time.

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((Fenrir))))

Thank you for reaching out. Sometimes it takes all we have to even do that but you did and we are so glad. What you said, "we never asked for all this & hurts", is a very true statement. You did not ask for this as none of us asked for this. The pain is beyond words, sometimes not even words can explain. We do hear you and validate what you are feeling, and want you to know that you are not alone.

The feeling like a freak or outcast or burden we understand all too well. But we want you to know that you are anything but those things. You and your system within are beautifully created and allowed you to go forth in what never should have been taking place. The mind is an amazing thing and it allowed you to survive what otherwise you may not have survived.

We are glad you did and that you are here. At times it is overwhelming, taking everything we have to keep going. It feels as though the world runs while for many we are trying to learn to walk. It takes courage to try when it would be so much easier to stop. We see you trying each time you reach out and share another part of yourself. We hear you and we validate what you are feeling.

I know you feel messed up and chaotic and not whole, fragmented and broken. We know that feeling and it is hard to feel that way. But each part of you is worth so much. They hold feelings, thoughts, memories, pieces of the whole----you. As you walk this road to healing the brokenness and chaos will begin to settle and slowly come together. It takes time for it took time to get to where we are.

Know that we are here and you are not alone. We are all walking this path together listening, encouraging, crying with and for, supporting, and caring. Where sometimes there seems to be no understanding, we understand here and we can relate and respect all parts and the whole.

You say that you are too fragmented and broken to be something whole or coherent or normal. Someday you will be whole, at least where it will not seem so broken or fragmented. What is normal? Each person is unique and has something to offer. Being different is okay for if we were all the same how could we be there for others or offer support. Those that claim to be normal sometimes I wonder, and I ask myself if that is normal do I want to be like that?

I think in time things will make a little more sense as you walk this path to healing. Things will not always feel this way. But I want you to know that we accept you for who you are----all of you. And we are here for you and are listening and hearing you. You are not alone and we care.

I am sorry you are going through this for you do and did not deserve this. Please keep reaching out and letting us know how you are. Even when you cannot say anything we hear you. Be kind to you and all within for you are worth it and you did a great thing to survive. Know we are here if you need anything.

Sending gentle hugs and loving thoughts. Always.

dps