[Rogue Bullies]

So I will have had what I believe is depersonalization for 2 months on the 15 of this month. I had 2 huge panic attacks around 5 days ago and was doing better before that, but now I feel stuck again. Ever since those panic attacks I feel like I have lost complete connection with myself. Before I felt more of the dream like feeling and now I feel more of the robot like feeling as how DP is descried. I don't really know how to explain this, but I honestly feel like not human or something and I can't remember who I was. When I first got DP I wanted to go back to normal so bad, but now I don't know what normal is. I don't know who I am or why I am in even on this earth. I have had a lot of odd thoughts, but this one is by far the worst and bone chilling when I think of it. I am wondering because I have had DP for longer now if everyone goes through this or not. I question who I am all the time now and I don't understand myself or human life anymore. This is very disturbing, in fact the worse yet. Before also my BF or someone I knew use to comfort me, but now I just feel disconnected from them as well. Its like I know them, but there is just something missing. I think back and wonder if I ever existed. I woke up one day not understanding who I was and got sick to where I almost puked. Is this a normal part of DP and will it go away when the DP goes away? I just don't get it anymore I don't even get the point of life or being me.

[Lillyleaf]

It will go away but only if you let it,

Hugs,
I hope you feel better soon,
Firefly

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Rogue Bullies

So I will have had what I believe is depersonalization for 2 months on the 15 of this month. I had 2 huge panic attacks around 5 days ago and was doing better before that, but now I feel stuck again. Ever since those panic attacks I feel like I have lost complete connection with myself. Before I felt more of the dream like feeling and now I feel more of the robot like feeling as how DP is descried. I don't really know how to explain this, but I honestly feel like not human or something and I can't remember who I was. When I first got DP I wanted to go back to normal so bad, but now I don't know what normal is. I don't know who I am or why I am in even on this earth. I have had a lot of odd thoughts, but this one is by far the worst and bone chilling when I think of it. I am wondering because I have had DP for longer now if everyone goes through this or not. I question who I am all the time now and I don't understand myself or human life anymore. This is very disturbing, in fact the worse yet. Before also my BF or someone I knew use to comfort me, but now I just feel disconnected from them as well. Its like I know them, but there is just something missing. I think back and wonder if I ever existed. I woke up one day not understanding who I was and got sick to where I almost puked. Is this a normal part of DP and will it go away when the DP goes away? I just don't get it anymore I don't even get the point of life or being me.

sometimes drugs like pot have this kind of lasting affects. Especially on those that may have allergies or sensitivities to drugs/alcohol or other medicating ways. it may be for some reason your body cant tolerate nor purge itself of the side effects of street drugs.

my suggestion contact your doctor and let them know you experimented with pot and now this is happening. they may give you a medication that can counteract/detox your body from these lasting effects. or you can also check yourself into a detox program where they can do the same thing as inpatient, which ever is more comfortable.

[Rogue Bullies]

Originally Posted by amandalouise

sometimes drugs like pot have this kind of lasting affects. Especially on those that may have allergies or sensitivities to drugs/alcohol or other medicating ways. it may be for some reason your body cant tolerate nor purge itself of the side effects of street drugs.

my suggestion contact your doctor and let them know you experimented with pot and now this is happening. they may give you a medication that can counteract/detox your body from these lasting effects. or you can also check yourself into a detox program where they can do the same thing as inpatient, which ever is more comfortable.

Well the thing is the actual drug should be out of my system by now. However the mind effect has lasted which isn't caused by the drug anymore I believe its depersonalization which is caused by anxiety. I have been to the doctor several times no one seems to know or be able to help. I am seeking therapy and she is trying to find me a new doctor that may help. I tried to go on paxil, but it made everything worse so I am not taking it any more.

[Hunny]

RB:

I'm so glad you are able to post here. It is reminding me of something from so many years ago after taking something someone gave me, a so-called friend. I think there is some neurological damage and changes that can take place with different chemicals. Even prescription meds have huge ramifications on people's brains. Also, going on meds and going off them can change brain chemistry.

Who knows the changes that can take place in a brain, except maybe those in the medical field. I think it is worth checking out. There is also another part to this site called Neuro Psych. I went there and asked some questions and got some really incredible information back. It many be worth a try.

I am really worried about you RB.

You really may need some neurological testing to make sure it isn't something in your physical brain. Some more serious things like cancers can affect a persons perceptions and behaviours. I'm not trying to frighten you but I just think it is worth checking out with a medical doctor and yes, perhaps still hang out with a counsellor for other stuff.

Do take care,
Hunny

[Rogue Bullies]

Originally Posted by Hunny

RB:

I'm so glad you are able to post here. It is reminding me of something from so many years ago after taking something someone gave me, a so-called friend. I think there is some neurological damage and changes that can take place with different chemicals. Even prescription meds have huge ramifications on people's brains. Also, going on meds and going off them can change brain chemistry.

Who knows the changes that can take place in a brain, except maybe those in the medical field. I think it is worth checking out. There is also another part to this site called Neuro Psych. I went there and asked some questions and got some really incredible information back. It many be worth a try.

I am really worried about you RB.

You really may need some neurological testing to make sure it isn't something in your physical brain. Some more serious things like cancers can affect a persons perceptions and behaviours. I'm not trying to frighten you but I just think it is worth checking out with a medical doctor and yes, perhaps still hang out with a counsellor for other stuff.

Do take care,
Hunny

Thank you for your reply

I read that marijuana can't damage to your brain especially from just that one time when I took it. However I know what you are talking about with chemicals and I think it may have caused a chemical imbalance leaving me in the "flight or fight" state of mind. I got blood tests and all that a while back and everything was fine. I am going to look into a head doctor, but I may go back to a regular doctor to have a MRI or something just to make sure. However I am pretty sure its just all anxiety related which is what causes depersonalization. To update I am feeling a tiny bit better today so far that is.