T is leaving on Tues for a week, the H is leaving Wed till Thurs, and our friend Barb is leaving Thurs for a MONTH. I know that the Mother got to all of them and is sending them all away. It always happens that when I think I can talk about the bad, mad stuff, they go away. OUr friend Louise went away after w_i told her about us. She's far away. I know that the Mother found our T and is sending her away and when she comes back she won't tell us because she won't be able to see us. The Mother did that when w_i and I were in school. w_i told the guidance counselor about some bad stuff and then we went to the school psychologist and she called in the Mother and the Mother said that they were NEVER to talk to us again. The guidance counselor went away for a week after that and his office door was locked and I couldn't hide under his desk like I always did when I was afraid. When he came back he said he couldn't help us anymore because of Mother.
See--I think I better not come here anymore because if Mother finds you all, then she will send you all away because I told you stuff.
w_i says not to worry and stuff like that, but she doesn't know what Mother can do because I was the one out and protected her from that.
We see T tomorrow, but I don't think I better come front because if I do then she will get into more trouble.
It's just not worth it for everyone to get into trouble. I think I will go away for good.
Vicki

Vicki, I'm not going anywhere! The Mother can't get to me and I don't believe she can get to others here either.

I'm sorry so many people are going to be away. It must be scary for you. I hate it when people go away and I get scared that it is because I have said stuff too. But I am sure they will come back, and I don't believe them going away has anything to do with you saying stuff. I hope you can talk to your T about this tomorrow.
Caroline

It's all a big scam--that people care, that they're there for you. I don't believe it. It was a fun fairy tale. Nothing is really true. Why am I even here?
Back inside
Gotta hide
It's all a lie
She makes them fly
away.
Vicki

[Mahali]

the mother has no power over these people. Maybe she did years ago over others but none with your T or people here. Talk to T tomorrow and you will see. T will be back and H will be back when friend leaves or soon after. You are not alone or abandoned.

place

[Fuzzybear]

seeing as I don't have DID it is amazing how I relate to some of this stuff

Gentle bearhugs,
Fuzzy

This is for the entire constellation (of which I am an honorary member)

{{{{{ BIG FAT HUGS }}}}}

Petunia

[shadowdancer]

Vicki the Mother hasn't gotten to any of the people here and she hasn't gotten to H or to T or to Barb. it just is a crappy coincidence that they all have to go at the same time. talk to your T he will tell you...and so will H and Barb if you ask them. i know i would tell you that.

i dare the Mother to try and get to me! i will take care of her. don't you worry Vicki, we all care about you and we're not going anywhere...and we don't want you to leave us either. please stay out and talk with us Vicki, we'll help you get through this rough time until T and H and Barb come back.

(((((((((((((((((Vicki))))))))))))))))))

i am always here for you. even if i'm not right on PC, the second i get on, i will reply to anything you send me and be here to talk if you need/want to. take care and stay safe.

-shadow

Know what you mean about hiding and all the other scary stuff. But I also know that people DO care, they are here for you. Come out of the hidey hole and take a peek, Vicki.
elsie

[allthegirls6]

Hi vicki, I know how you feel about people going away. I struggle when my therapist goes away and often find that I have to count the days till she returns. And when she goes on holiday I feel like getting really angry and feel abandoned that she would go off to have a good time and leave me behind. Im trying to learn how to beleive that she will return and still feel the same about me. The truth is she always does retun and always feels the same.

But in a way its worse for you guys as you seem to have a lot of people go at the one time but I suspect its coincidence and not becasue of what anyone has to say.

And vicki, it would not matter what you say, i wouldnt go anywhere. Im not saying I would have the answers, but I am saying Im willing to listen to how you feel and I will stay around. No one can make me go away and what you say will only make me want to stay more........ you are worth listening to.

So take your time, take a big deep breath and when you are ready I and lots of other people here will always be willing to listen and happy to stick around.

Do you know why that is? Its becasue you are just lovely vicki, so to is W I.

Thank you (((((((((((((((everyone))))))))))). I did talk to T and she said she is going to a confrence, worse than school. Not a fun thing she said. She doesn't know the Mother and she isn't ascared of her. She said that it's all the stuff before that makes me scared---just like Place said---But I'm still worried about something happening and them not coming back. T gave me the emergency # and said if I need to talk I can call. I want to be brave and responsible and not call. We will be alone Wed. night, and if it's ok, I will come here.
I'm trying really hard, but it's so hard to do now time (real time??). I don't know too much. Everything feels now even if it's not.
Vicki

Glad you are feeling a bit better about this, and that you talked to T. Look forward to seeing you on Wednesday - though the time difference means we may not be on at the same time. But if we are and you want to chat, send me a pm and I will meet you in chat.
C