Why is it everywhere I go and everywhere I turn and any PROFESSIONAL I come across has to share with me that they also have parts, as if to say "look you idiot, I have parts too and I'm not running around trying to throw myself in front of buses".

Or as if to say "you are taking this way too seriously, you are fine, grow up and pick yourself up off the ground".

Every skeptical professional I get near feels the need to tell me about their "ego states" and how "they react differently to different situations also". Before I ever bring it up. Just because they know I have DID. I've become like some laughing stock of the psychiatric world around here. Why? Does this happen to other people? Or do people just hate me?

They'll also say things like "your voice never changes" and "Well I've never seen you switch". Uh idiot, yes you probably have, but your head is too far up your *** to notice.

They act like I'm using this as some excuse, or some attention seeking method. But these are people who barely talk to me and don't care to get to know me. If they did, they would know how miserable I am with this illness and how little desire or energy I have for actual attention. Which is why I have no friends, or intimate relationships. Because my energy is negative.

I know I should concentrate on the people who are close to me. Who know my case well. My therapist, my psychiatrist and ignore the rest, but it's just so irritating. It's like they're on a witch hunt and no matter the outcome, I'm the witch.

[Puzzle_]

This is part of the reason, unfortunately..I didnt want to seek help once I was told about DID, at first, when I saw the symptoms and was told it described what I was experiencing I was happy that what I was going through wasnt just me being horribly disorganized and forgetful and just plain "bad"..... and then, I realized the controversy amongst mental health professionals, I started hiding...trying to hide DID the best I can, because didnt want them doing what you're describing.

Even though I switch in T, it took a LONG time for my T to put things together..I had switched a lot in the beginning, but the alters werent making themselves known, or addressing themselves differently or trying to make it obvious....But as trust began to build, they started to completely reveal themselves, and I would have more "full switches" in therapy, because they wanted to talk...
I cant control my switches even when I dont trust someone...and Ive had people that have told me I seem different, but things can be rationalized to the DEATH.

I mean...people that know me in general just describe me as they know me, but two people might have two different views of me because they've only come in contact with certain alters....and my voice only changes sometimes, if its a "young alter" is the only time I believe it could be noticed, but usually people just ask me if Im sick or I make up excuses, like "my throat hurts today" ...if suddenly they point out a different behavior or voice tone.

I dont know but DID, isnt extremely obvious in my case....I dont have major switches constantly...but I do switch pretty much every day...I have some switches where theres no doubt I am not me, but they dont happen as often as the tiny switches..and ill suddenly find myself losing time again.
My therapist is pretty good, but it took her a very very long time to realize my switches and for my alters to make themselves known, it wasnt like one day I walked in there telling her to call me a different name... (although this may be the case with other people).

I try to hide my DID as much as possible, (usually it doesnt work very well...so I end up terminating friendships before they notice anything) only very few people know about it because I am a recluse!, but if someone spent all day following me around ...they would probably notice something eventually, but seeing someone for an hour every week...doesnt mean someone "knows" me how I am all the time.

Your therapist knows you well, and knows your case, I truly hope your therapist can validate you, have you told her yuou feel this way? I mean, after all DID is a coping mechanism its not always that obvious, its meant to help you cope with a situation that was overwhelming for you...and you could have coped a bit differently, even if its still in the context/definition of DID, but not always as obvious.

Hope things get better

Puzzle_Puzzle_

[carrie_ann]

Hi LydiaB
maybe when they share with you that they have parts also they are just trying to put you at ease and let you know that it's ok to openly talk about it. where i come from there is a lot of stigma attached to any form of mental health, and even now i live in the city, docs etc have always tried to make me realize it's ok to talk about. like a counsellor i saw once and the subject of my disassociating came up ... she would tell me something about her just suddenly being aware her mind had wandered. she wasn't trying to be condescending, just trying to make me at ease. maybe that's all they are trying to do but are just slightly clumsy with it? just a thought.

[jax01]

I haven't had to deal with too much of this kind of thing. but that's only because I don't really have alot of contact with too many people. And I haven't told any one other than a couple of friends.
One said "that explains a lot, actualy."

The other said those two things.

-Your voice doesn't change.
-I've never seen you switch.

The best I could come up with was to explain that it was a defense system, and it wouldn't work if it was obvious to everybody. that if the person it was defending me against could see it happen they'd be all over me. they'd have never let it go.

and that's the truth. it took a long time to understand that. I even dress to be as invisable as possible.

people try to be okay with mental health issues. they want to be open minded and non judgmental. but it's just not that easy. And so they try to say something along the lines of "I can relate.." or "I understand.." But it just isn't that simple.

[likewater]

I think it's human nature. I get migraines. I remember telling a friend i wasnt going out because i had a migraine. She said," oh come on. I have a headache too. Let's go to the movies." Anyone who gets migraines knows this was insulting. People just cant imagine / fathom and maybe dont want to imagine that someonw can have experiences outside of their own. They want to relate and understand and instead of trying on your shoes will imagine you are in theirs to feel better. I cant even understand my own mind so i KNOW i cant understand anyone else's.

Of course there is a spectrum for dissociating and ego states. Any moron knows that. Dissociating could be anything from a normal xdaydream to forgetting decades of your life. Of course all people have some degree of ego states . Normal adults will still feel younger sometimes when visiting home for example or put on a facade for a job interview. I would ask the T that told you they had
ego states too what his/her point was? Is as pointless as saying , "i feel sad sometimes too, " to someone with clinical depression.
Or someone with a broken pinkie bragging to someone with a broken neck, " we both had broken bones and i healed faster, what's wrong with you? You dont see me complaining."

[Kiya]

Thanks to books (movies) like Syble and Three Faces of Eve, etc, that is what people believe DID/MPD to be. Of COURSE they haven't noticed; DID is a coping skill of hiding in plain sight to stay alive. If it were noticed it wouldn't be working!!! It's not having multiples that causes problems - it's when the coping skill STOPS working that things unravel and problems arise.