[abusedtoy]

We have found out that one of the sadistic alter, Louise, who has been verbally abusing another alter in my mind back and forth. She makes him cry and tells him that he is unlovable and all that. She calls him a piece of s--t. I told my T about this and she said that even the bad ones have a purpose?

[dlantern]

Possible live it out find out how she got to be....Is it a depiction of past relationship situation, just like home. Is out for some sort of emotion in its feelings basically share what is new....I want to be just blah blah in this moment save the emotions for something else where it is acceptable at. Find a way to deflect in a direction interact with is alter ego ideally I'd like for you to be this, believe that for it until you get to know other alters.

[abusedtoy]

dlantern, she is an abuser alter. She punishes the other alter by beating him up, whenever he feels good, even just having a meal.

[L.P.]

I'm inclined to agree with your t. I also think they all have a purpose. For me and my system it all comes down to a few things though... are their good qualities just buried under nasty ones as a defense mechanism, is what used to work to keep us safe now dysfunctional/damaging, or maybe is it some kind of programming set in place by an abuser (like a persecutor alter instead of a protector type) right? We had one who used to do that and she was/is a self hating type but she's aggressive so it's never a sad hate but a violent one. She has long since learned to better channel that anger towards productive ends though. She's really helpful and on top of her stuff now. Was not always that way though...

[Solnutty]

I had a verbally abusive alter. My t told me they all have a purpose. I eventually learned she thought she was protecting the system by her abuse. She wanted to keep the system secret by keeping us from communicating, so she would bully to shut things down. She thought if one of the little ones was allowed to interact with the others, everything would fall apart and outsiders would think we were crazy. She did change. Now she is protective in a better way.
I had another who was downright sadistic and manipulative. He acted this way because it was a way of relaxing (I know that doesn’t make sense but go with it) and it was really his only way of interacting with others in a satisfying way- like, his way of enjoying someone’s company. Even he changed, and became one of the most helpful alters in the system.
So yeah, it sounds insane to suggest that a malicious alter is serving some purpose but, at least in my system, I’ve found out that I can’t get anywhere with them until I respectfully acknowledge what it is they are trying to achieve. After that there is some hope that they will listen to me, and I can suggest different ways of accomplishing that purpose that are better for us all. Just like dealing with difficult people in life. They aren’t willing to hear what I have to say until I’m willing to meet them where they are at and hear what they have to say. I don’t have to agree, wrong is still wrong. On the outside we usually have the option of avoiding awful people, but with insiders we don’t. It takes a certain patience and respect.

[Amyjay]

I too think they all have a purpose although sometimes I really don't know what that purpose is.

Possible trigger:

Last week I was aware (coconscious) of an alter being out in the body abusing another alter quite awfully. He was so aggressive and hateful towards the other. He really wanted to hurt her and make her suffer, and she did.

There will be a purpose for that even though i don't know what it is yet.

these articles might be helpful
https://www.discussingdissociation.c...re-introjects/

https://www.discussingdissociation.c...uctive-alters/

[abusedtoy]

Originally Posted by dlantern

Possible live it out find out how she got to be....Is it a depiction of past relationship situation, just like home. Is out for some sort of emotion in its feelings basically share what is new....I want to be just blah blah in this moment save the emotions for something else where it is acceptable at. Find a way to deflect in a direction interact with is alter ego ideally I'd like for you to be this, believe that for it until you get to know other alters.

I have 14 alters at the moment...with distinctive personalities. This sadistic alter, Louise, speaks to other alters to hurt them the deepest way possible.

[abusedtoy]

Originally Posted by L.P.

I'm inclined to agree with your t. I also think they all have a purpose. For me and my system it all comes down to a few things though... are their good qualities just buried under nasty ones as a defense mechanism, is what used to work to keep us safe now dysfunctional/damaging, or maybe is it some kind of programming set in place by an abuser (like a persecutor alter instead of a protector type) right? We had one who used to do that and she was/is a self hating type but she's aggressive so it's never a sad hate but a violent one. She has long since learned to better channel that anger towards productive ends though. She's really helpful and on top of her stuff now. Was not always that way though...

LP, thank you for your input. I am so glad that there is improvement for your violent part towards something more productive now. I think the protector is the "hiding place", where other parts run into him, whenever they want to feel "safe". How does your protector alter act like?

[abusedtoy]

Originally Posted by Solnutty

I had a verbally abusive alter. My t told me they all have a purpose. I eventually learned she thought she was protecting the system by her abuse. She wanted to keep the system secret by keeping us from communicating, so she would bully to shut things down. She thought if one of the little ones was allowed to interact with the others, everything would fall apart and outsiders would think we were crazy. She did change. Now she is protective in a better way.
I had another who was downright sadistic and manipulative. He acted this way because it was a way of relaxing (I know that doesn’t make sense but go with it) and it was really his only way of interacting with others in a satisfying way- like, his way of enjoying someone’s company. Even he changed, and became one of the most helpful alters in the system.
So yeah, it sounds insane to suggest that a malicious alter is serving some purpose but, at least in my system, I’ve found out that I can’t get anywhere with them until I respectfully acknowledge what it is they are trying to achieve. After that there is some hope that they will listen to me, and I can suggest different ways of accomplishing that purpose that are better for us all. Just like dealing with difficult people in life. They aren’t willing to hear what I have to say until I’m willing to meet them where they are at and hear what they have to say. I don’t have to agree, wrong is still wrong. On the outside we usually have the option of avoiding awful people, but with insiders we don’t. It takes a certain patience and respect.

Solnutty, it is nice to hear from you and your explanation.

A seemingly persecutor alter turns out to be a protective one is really interesting. It is also interesting to know that another downright sadistic part of you finds it "relaxing". I am so glad that they have changed and became more productive in the system. This is really good!

I agree with you that outsiders can be avoided, but insiders, we have to deal with it. I can understand how much work you have put onto it to deal with other parts of you. Good job.

I still haven't figured out the reason behind this sadistic alter who only wants to harm other alters...?

[abusedtoy]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

I too think they all have a purpose although sometimes I really don't know what that purpose is.

Possible trigger:

Last week I was aware (coconscious) of an alter being out in the body abusing another alter quite awfully. He was so aggressive and hateful towards the other. He really wanted to hurt her and make her suffer, and she did.

There will be a purpose for that even though i don't know what it is yet.

Amy, nice to hear from you.

I am glad that we can relate in this journey of discovering what is happening within the system. Louise, one of the parts would flagellate another part to let him feel pain over his legs, back and arms. She would humiliate him. Then, sometimes, she would scribble the original birth identity name on a piece of paper to hurt the core. Then, within us, both feelings of hurt and gladness occur simultaneously. It is weird. I am sorry to hear about what he has done to her in your system.

[L.P.]

Originally Posted by abusedtoy

LP, thank you for your input. I am so glad that there is improvement for your violent part towards something more productive now. I think the protector is the "hiding place", where other parts run into him, whenever they want to feel "safe". How does your protector alter act like?

Hi. We got lots of protector types and well they sure act diffrent. The onee that was bein talked about up there before that ones my sister Gwen. Well she not my real for real sister but i sure call her that. Haha. Me n her real close. Yep.

Well mostly Gwen acts grumpy. Haha. Gwen is the one who was bein talked about before. We got lots of protectors n they act diffrent from eaachother. But it makke sense gwen act grumpy cuz of what she take care of now. Gwen is a age slider but she never get older then a teen n what she does now is tae care of adulting when we to messed up in the head to be doin it by ourselfs. So then she gotta come round and she all oh geez these people been slackin n now i gotta do all this work n im just a kid!?!? grrr. See? I dont blame her id be grumpy to. I try to help her but its tough sometimes especialy when i feel real real small. Its ok she dont get mad at me for real or nothin she just get fussy.

We got a hiding place one to n he is real quiet and walks around and makes a spot for scared ones to go n stay. Its a woods place in our head n he is protector of the woods. Im glad you got one like that. I know how important our one like thaat is. I bet yours is important like that to. We got lots of other ones to but yah they act diffrent cuz well i guess cuz they are diffrent some are grumpy or vilent or rreal calm cool cucumber types. Haha. It depends. I talked a lot n i sure hope is answered what you was wonderin.

nikki

[abusedtoy]

Originally Posted by L.P.

Hi. We got lots of protector types and well they sure act diffrent. The onee that was bein talked about up there before that ones my sister Gwen. Well she not my real for real sister but i sure call her that. Haha. Me n her real close. Yep.

Well mostly Gwen acts grumpy. Haha. Gwen is the one who was bein talked about before. We got lots of protectors n they act diffrent from eaachother. But it makke sense gwen act grumpy cuz of what she take care of now. Gwen is a age slider but she never get older then a teen n what she does now is tae care of adulting when we to messed up in the head to be doin it by ourselfs. So then she gotta come round and she all oh geez these people been slackin n now i gotta do all this work n im just a kid!?!? grrr. See? I dont blame her id be grumpy to. I try to help her but its tough sometimes especialy when i feel real real small. Its ok she dont get mad at me for real or nothin she just get fussy.

We got a hiding place one to n he is real quiet and walks around and makes a spot for scared ones to go n stay. Its a woods place in our head n he is protector of the woods. Im glad you got one like that. I know how important our one like thaat is. I bet yours is important like that to. We got lots of other ones to but yah they act diffrent cuz well i guess cuz they are diffrent some are grumpy or vilent or rreal calm cool cucumber types. Haha. It depends. I talked a lot n i sure hope is answered what you was wonderin.

nikki

Dear Nikki,

Thank you for explaining about your protectors. They sure have important roles to do. I like the way that he makes a wood space for the scared little ones to stay in. It is good to have a hiding place to feel safe. Interesting...

Wonderful to know that you and Gwen are close sisters. I can understand all the parts have different personalities and so that they act differently.

I wish all the best to you and your recovery.