[Penthus]

I am reposting most of what I wrote in the New Member Introductions:

I came to PsychCentral because, initially I was seeking relief from the agony of transference. I couldn't seem to find a resolution with my current therapist but could not seem to break away, either. I did quit for several months, but during that time I sank into a deep depression and lost enough weight to have to go see a doctor.

Several months ago I went to see another therapist while still in therapy with my current therapist to help me find a way out the confusion. This "secondary" therapist now believes that I might have DID. I am freaked out by the prospect! I believe it's all got to do with the trauma of my original therapist rejecting my transference but I can't be sure.

I do know my life has been nothing short of chaos. I just can't seem to live one day at a time. Or even one moment at a time like a normal, healthy functioning adult. If I have DID wouldn't I be aware of it?

I probably need to be in the Psychotherapy forum and I am going to go there but I am desperate for some feedback from those who absolutely know they have DID.

Penthus

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Penthus

I am reposting most of what I wrote in the New Member Introductions:

I came to PsychCentral because, initially I was seeking relief from the agony of transference. I couldn't seem to find a resolution with my current therapist but could not seem to break away, either. I did quit for several months, but during that time I sank into a deep depression and lost enough weight to have to go see a doctor.

Several months ago I went to see another therapist while still in therapy with my current therapist to help me find a way out the confusion. This "secondary" therapist now believes that I might have DID. I am freaked out by the prospect! I believe it's all got to do with the trauma of my original therapist rejecting my transference but I can't be sure.

I do know my life has been nothing short of chaos. I just can't seem to live one day at a time. Or even one moment at a time like a normal, healthy functioning adult. If I have DID wouldn't I be aware of it?

I probably need to be in the Psychotherapy forum and I am going to go there but I am desperate for some feedback from those who absolutely know they have DID.

Penthus

your question....

Originally Posted by Penthus

If I have DID wouldn't I be aware of it?

no you would not necessarily be aware of it....with DID there is many different things to consider....

the diagnostic criteria
http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...s-dsm-5-a.html

co consciousness - this is how much a person is aware of what is going on with in their self / their alters/ their symptoms.. some people are aware that they have alternate personalities some are not. here in the USA the new diagnostics for dissociative disorders now includes a separate dissociative disorder (OSDD -Other Specified Dissociative Disorder) for people that do not lose much or any awareness when they have dissociated to the point of being an altered personality. DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) is mostly... but not always.... applied to those with little to no awareness, since the new diagnostic were put out.

persons mental, medical and medicinal health history ...this is taken into consideration because the diagnostic criteria require many medical health issues to be ruled out before a person can carry any dissociative disorders due to the fact that many medical, mental and medicinal symptoms can appear to be dissociative problems.

if you think you do or dont have a dissociative disorder you can request psychiatric evaluation procedures. these are a battery of tests (both medical and mental) that can tell you whether you have a dissociative disorder or not, which one and what treatment plans would best work for you.

[Travelinglady]

Hey, Penthus, and welcome to Psych Central! I'm sure you want to talk to folks who have DID, but I think they come from a background of abuse in most cases. They won't be able to professionally agree or disagree with things.

But you can wait to see if someone responds.

Yep, head to the Psychotherapy forum, and also bring us your thoughts about your old therapist to your new one.

[amandalouise]

also wanted to add that yes this is the correct forum to talk about dissociative disorders. the psychotherapy forum is for talking about therapy, and therapy treatment providers ie therapy sessions, therapists, psychiatrists, problems you may be having in therapy or with your therapist, mental health treatments like DBT, CBT, grounding, what ever.....

from what I see in your post since it talks about your therapist old and new it can fit in with psychotherapy too.

one thing I go by when posting is if I'm not sure where to post I send a copy in to the moderators and they will help me decide which forum it goes in.. they will also move any posts that do not belong in one forum to another that fgits the post better so that members have a chance to get replies for their posts from the target (topic of post) audience.

since you want to talk with people who actually have DID your best bet would be here in the dissociative forum...

example I had the diagnosis of DID until all my alters integrated with me (merged, became one with me)

it is correct that here in america the documentation shows that DID is created in very young children (here in NY the demographics say under the age of 5) from extreme abuse.

the belief among the mental health community here in NY is that something like therapy does not create DID unless it is a situation where something called false memory syndrome comes into play... thats where a treatment provider causes a person to believe they were abused // have abuse memories, when they in reality were not abused by their parents, family friends or a stranger, or when the person in therapy feels like they need to have been abused or need to have abuse memories or need to have a mental disorder for the attention of the treatment provider.

here in NY there are strict laws and ethics how a treatment provider can work with someone, so that they do not cause a client to have false memory syndrome or a mental disorder they do not actually have from therapy....

example

here in NY state treatment providers must work on stability of their day to day life first before they work on things of a triggering nature (ie trauma memories)

here in NYstate a treatment provider can not focus on causing a person to dissociate into one of their alternate personalities, calling out of alters by a treatment provider is strictly forbidden. that's not to say a person with DID wont dissociate into their alters if they have DID. therapy is working on your problems you can not work on your own because on your own you avoid those problems or they are too hard for you to handle. so through just the natural nature of what therapy is a person with DID will naturally dissociate into their alters during therapy sessions.

the key here is that here in NY treatment providers all work on many different mental disorders, problems and symptoms, which means they get training on how to recognize things like whether a person has DID or not.

here what is taught in training is when you suspect a client of having a mental disorder like DID first evaluate how often the symptoms happen before you disclose what you suspect is the mental disorder, document it if needed, then after you have observed the client with out their knowing what is suspected, disclose that idea. if the client suddenly shows more symptoms rather then less or the same its highly suspicious and send the client to a psychiatrist for accurate diagnosis process. Documentation here in NY shows most people with mental disorders tend to hide their symptoms rather than present with increased symptoms after being told a potential diagnosis like DID especially if they do not like that diagnosis.

here at the crisis center the guide is that regardless of situation we have to refer the client to a psychiatrist for mental disorder diagnosis if we suspect any mental disorders are involved.

I got diagnosed with DID in my early 20's. I was in college psych courses where as part of the curriculum we had to take a psychiatric evaluation, search for a psychiatrist, take our tests with us to the intake appointment and enter treatment. this was so that those of us that go on to become treatment providers would have experienced the process first hand and would understand what our clients go through.

I entered therapy for depression/anxiety. my therapist one day disclosed to me she had conversations with what she believed to be alternate personalities and referred me to diagnostic evaluations. there are many different mental and physical health problems that cause a person to seem to have different personalities so I had to go through some mental, physical and academic testing procedures. then I was scheduled with my therapist for a session with the psychiatrist where we were given the diagnosis results including all the different scales the testing process includes....

severity (where I hit on all the scales for dissociation, depression, anxiety, ......)

validity (hesitations in answering, erasures of answers, probabilities, how truthful I was being via video and test results.....

Social, academic, physical, mental, occupational... gosh so many different scores are involved with diagnosing mental disorders and their affects on a person.. each test has their own battery of areas and mental disorders they evaluate.

then a meeting was called with all my treatment providers so that we were all on the same page with treatment options, and such.

then as I grew stronger at handling my problems each of the alters integrated with me as their job, purpose, reason for being was no longer needed.

I did not know I had DID until after I was diagnosed. I had certain symptoms but those symptoms were things that could have been any mental or physical health problems or even normal because there is a normal phase of dissociation besides the abnormal. example I sometimes heard voices but hearing voices can also b e because of things like not eating right, not getting enough sleep, stress, or any other mental or physical health problem.

I hope hearing my story has helped you to understand a bit better and again my suggestion is if you suspect you have a mental disorder contact your treatment providers and they can refer you to diagnostic procedures.

[Penthus]

amandalouise-

Thanks for the helpful reply and the link.

I have struggled my entire life with, well, finding a center, a "real" me. I have been told by several therapists in the past that I have different identities that are constantly at war with each other. I have always understood this to be some kind of metaphor, not an actual diagnosis of DID.

The therapist I had the transference with---yes i know I need to be in the psychotherapy forum for that---did some work with my unconscious, almost like hypnosis, except that it involved music. I wonder now if that caused my dissociation to become more readily apparent? I haven't quite been the same since. Along with the apparent transference, I feel like the quality of my life over the last 18 months has been eroding at a steady clip.

Going to see two therapists at one time may not be enough!

[Penthus]

Thanks so much for the response. I return today to the therapist who told me last week he believes I have DID. I am a little anxious but do feel the need to talk about it since so much of what I have experienced in life seems to fit a little better now.

But...Your story tells me how important it is to NOT simply accept this diagnosis without getting additional help. Here in TN, "therapy" doesn't seem to be as closely regulated as it appears to be in NY. The work that went into properly evaluating your situation appears to be very worth it.

Again, I do appreciate the feedback.

[Travelinglady]

Thanks, amandalouise. I have been concerned that people really do need to have a diagnosis of DID before coming here, and I see now that that's not true.

Penthus, I am glad you are on your way to finding out what is happening with you.