Thanks.

We have protector out cuz of some medical doctor issues. It has been a long time since we have told other people we're DID. Forgot how wonderful it is to just say it. Just own it & feel safe. And hear other people do the same.

Do you find it a little surreal too? Im not really in to owning it just yet - although the fact Im on here daily is probably a big step towards that!

Definitely, surreal. For a few minutes we were feeling let's tell everyone!! This is freeing. Then reality raises it's ugly head. We decided tho if the CIA really wants to read our stuff, we'll let them! The best tho is when I admited it to ourselves. We r ok. In fact, I feel sorry for non DIDs at times. A friend said she wasn't coming over cuz she was not feeling well. We had important club business to do. I just wanted to say: sent the ill one away for an hour, and let's get this done. The I laughed & thought she a normal she can't.

I often think my head is making this up, but when I start moving and thinking like a different person, it's so real. Also my body seems to be on automatic doing its own thing.

I don't know if I can tell anyone else about this. I told my little sister, who lives 5 states away and hates the family so she's not going to say anything, and only the pdoc. I told my partner, but I got laughed at and was told that I'm faking it.

IMHO be very careful who u tell. Most people don't understand it. All they know, they learned from the movies. I tried leaving a pamplet on MPD once in my bathroom hoping my then boyfriend would read it. Now if that wasn't funny--everytime he came out we'd all be glaring at him!!! He went on for 10 minutes about how T's r just people with their own unsolved problems. Psychiatrist were lazy drs. What I admire about u AlwaysChanging2, is that u can connect with them + know u are acting different. We were totally unaware when one took over. People would ask why we did something + we'd laugh + say: it seemed like a good idea at the time. Thanks for responding to my post.

I've told my older sister because we both have problems and are both working together to heal
i haven't told her everything though... it was so hard telling my t their names when she asked, i was so sure she would ridicule us and call me a fraud
UGH telling people things is so TERRIFYING but can be so FREEING

As I wrote above, I told my little sister, and she said that she thought that our other sister would be the nutty one (she kinda is, she's the cat lady. She has a house full of cats). I didn't know how to take it, so I blew it off.

Since I instigated this mess, I'm dumping it all into my T's lap and letting her sort out the mess. The hardest part was asking for help.

I've written a notebook that has times, dates, alter names, events and examples in it. I'm even keeping a journal. I might just get her email address and send it all to her, then I can just walk in there and say "fix me" or whatever!

Yes I know, no one will get it because "it's not real" or it's an insanity defense, or because of Hollywood. There are still plenty of pdoc's that are of the school of "It doesn't exist".

There is plenty of times when I would say "Why'd I do that? What was I thinking?", "I don't know, I don't remember", "Who wrote that?", "Where did these clothes come from", "Who are you?", or "Where is it? It was just right there!" Lol

I do automatic handwriting since I was a kid, and I do question and answer which is time consuming. I asked others how do they communicate, and they said that they just talked to them. I just started talking in my head to see who would talk back, and I got an answer, well several, actually. The same voices that I thought were part of my thinking each now have a name, gender, and a personality associated with it. I've also learned that I'm always changing, sometimes switching from one minute to the next to cope with life or to do a job or task. I can "feel" the change now that it's obvious. I'm just lucky enough to not have large chunks of missing time.

I hope it gets better for you hun.