[peaches100]

I want somebody to tell me the truth. Once a person has significant problems with dissociation, due to numerous past traumatic events, does it ever really go away? I have been in therapy over 12 years with a great therapist, have learned much and made progress. Yet I still have so far to go to be truly psychologically healthy. Sometimes I feel like I've given it my all and I just can't go any farther. Maybe it is time to quit therapy and accept that I am flawed and must learn to function with my limitations anyway. I work so hard to get better, and it never seems to be enough.

[finding_my_way]

every person is different. my dissociation started probably around age 5, that i know of anyway. through childhood, for me it wasn't as much of a problem as when i was a teenager/in my early 20s where it was a very big problem, probably because i was more aware of it and the trauma and started putting pieces together.

i struggled with other issues during those years, self harm and anorexia, and it seemed once i got the anorexia managed, a lot of my dissociation lessened. i did have it way before the anorexia, so i am not going to say that it caused it 'more,' just that there was a huge shift around that time...also related to life changes in general that caused a shift.

i do still have dissociative times as well as other things that come up related to it, but they are a lot less for me. so, going from almost 24/7 years ago to just a few times a month or so (ranging in severity depending), it has improved.

i have seen my psychiatrist for 10 years but haven't done really actual therapy because i think it would probably open the floodgates and cause a lot more dissociation. part of the reason i stuck with her during the first few years was because she was the only one who understood it all and didn't push meds at me or other things that others had in the past and because i was quite unstable with the dissociation and harmful coping skills. so, i don't know what would happen if i went for actual therapy.

in the past, when i was seeing too many different professionals for things (case worker, eating disorder groups/dietitian, psychiatrist, community rehabilitation worker), it was too much and overwhelmed me..also because they were not all on the same page, so it was hard trying to manage all of that and switch gears with each one where not all understood what i struggled with.

so, everyone is different with how their progress is. have you seen any improvement in anything at all, dissociation related or not? maybe trying to focus on the positive things even if they are very small is still something?

it took me many years before i saw any change. everyone kept seeing they saw it, but i never did..probably because my head was still so cloudy, i was numb, etc. sometimes, like you, i still think at how far i have to go...but i would still take how i am now than how i was years ago because i have more stability now..and it is what i try to focus on.

[DomesticCompanion]

Hi Peaches. None of us is perfect. I don't know if it's a good idea to think of yourself as being "flawed." I'm not suggesting that you try to see yourself as being "flawless," but labeling yourself as "flawed" seems to put a negative spin on it. You're working toward helping yourself. You must be a good person. Maybe you should concentrate on not labeling yourself in a negative fashion. I don't know, but if you have to label yourself, think up some good labels: striving to be better, self-aware, etc.

I hope you have a nice day.

DC

Originally Posted by peaches100

I want somebody to tell me the truth. Once a person has significant problems with dissociation, due to numerous past traumatic events, does it ever really go away? I have been in therapy over 12 years with a great therapist, have learned much and made progress. Yet I still have so far to go to be truly psychologically healthy. Sometimes I feel like I've given it my all and I just can't go any farther. Maybe it is time to quit therapy and accept that I am flawed and must learn to function with my limitations anyway. I work so hard to get better, and it never seems to be enough.

Awww, I'm sorry....it is frustrating, tired some, and discouraging when one gets their hopes up and works hard to only get so far, but like you said, you've learned much and made progress which is really a great thing. It's no reason to give up now....you can do this...you've been doing this.

The damage done to us has been severe and runs deep...and it's not our fault, we didn't cause this...I hate to say we've been scarred for life, but we have been. Yes, it's no fair that we have to deal with this...but it's our lot in life to do so .......and it sounds like your winning, too. Just coming to grips with this and facing it daily takes bravery and a will.....kudos to you.

I don't know if it goes away, but it has to get better the more you work on it. Maybe taking a break? Hopefully others can say it does to you. Hang in there hun.