[Shaly78]

I once need you all to understand the hurt itself once those walls start to tumble is unimaginable words can't often tell the story of how bad it is....It was for this system.....I/we felt the need to understand everything, I think I credit SSDI decision very quickly with this....Too much in, out of curiosity, some of it compartmentalized it was too soon now its like I'm cleaning up a bunch and now learning it with their help. I tend to think its most people fantasy on here to be 100% better when this isn't all the answer on here because the experience is subjective. Really if you not really a lot better it might not be best to be on here unless a few things are true. I know at most the body does it things best and you be surprise of the consciousness you already have it doesn't have to answer you it has its own fight the way it will get it better and adjust it makes sense it has been this way our whole life...It does need that much training... Just like a healing of a medical problems dissected it can be repaired in some way so that cohesive is achieved....

[Luce]

If I understand you correctly (too much dissociated information/ experience coming together too quickly?) all I can say is I hear you. We recently did the same thing, driven by a combination of external circumstances and my need to know. It was very, very unsafe. We have patched it up a bit now, but there is residue stuff that can't be unknown. It requires a major system shift to accommodate this, and it is unsafe in very real ways in the external world. We are in a state of limbo at the moment.

[just2b]

Agreed. This what we keep telling T...most adult part gone right now cause another self harm and no one knows why. Can't ever tell most adult part ever, she not take it well we need get her into safe place if it happen, T think she handle it. We tell T no. So no one talk and T wait.

[Luce]

yeah stuff is dissociated for a reason. if it didnt need to be it wouldn't be, right? you have to let it come up when it comes up on its own. that one in us sure knows to back off now.

[Shaly78]

Venting, although you systems probably don't have it nearly bad is this system....He is proud of that too! Especially externally

Yea, I may be kooky, but the buried stuff can stay buried. We found a fragment and it almost killed us- dissociating driving at night on the freeway doing 70. Searing blood red agony. It's buried now but the event lingers.

I'm guessing that this is as good as it gets. If I avoid people, no friends, relations, people to observe our inner chaos and everyone can be free to be them without being judged constantly, it would be okay.

[Luce]

Originally Posted by Shaly78

Venting, although you systems probably don't have it nearly bad is this system....He is proud of that too! Especially externally

I don't think any one of us knows what crap happened in pther peopls lives.

[cherishme22]

I am in therapy now and I can't discuss anything. I'm so frighten. I am use to the no friends, relationship. I know how to handle this, not letting go. Can't do it, to dangerous! They don't see that.

[Shaly78]

Luce, I appreciate the affirmations of not contributing to the obliviousness since I informed with previous post, that really means a lot. Only with learning and observing the stories we told of people is the only way to know and learn someone....I don't claim anything psychic the other clairvoyance has yet to be demystified in fact it is not in the way a psychic would do it either...

Me personnaly, I've quite got this memory problem...I can't remember a few moments ago. I'm often laughed at about this. It's very embarrassing and cringing. The absentminded professor can't even begin to touch this.

I guess it's better for me to forget what just happened like always.