question

Hello, I have a question I am hoping someone can answer. Does any one have alters that are contacting other people without the core person knowing about it? My alters are at times take control and live like they want. But they all answer and pretend they are me around family members. These alters doesn't ever plan on integrating.

Does anyone have any like this.. If so how you deal with it and is it normal.

um not sure where you are located so what I post might not fit your situation. I am located in the USA. here DID is a mental disorder that happens in very young children (my locations mental health statistics\ demographics\ periodic census taking america goes through) documents before the age of 5.

what does that mean in relation to your question...it means every adult who has DID or OSDD (the dissociative disorders where a person has or may have alters) have gone their whole life time with alters taking control, a whole life time of alters being in contact with family friends strangers teachers doctors you name it.

as for the pretending side of this some people with DID and OSDD have the kind of system where their alters sense of agency is to pretend for many different reasons and others have the kind of system where they do not pretend, instead they just rapidly switch from one alter to another, and still others have a combination of these two types of systems where their alters switch sometimes and pretend other times.

you can read more about these mental disorders and sense of agency in my links at the bottom of my post.

heres where you can find more on discussions on systems that pretend see this thread, http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...retending.html in this thread the poster was more interested in systems like their own (those that do pretend)

so another thread was made to include others that used rapid switching or mostly rapid switching heres where you can find more discussions on systems that use only rapid switching or mostly just switching see this thread... http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...retending.html

Yes, I think it is 'normal' in the context of DID. It sounds like there are still strong amnesiac barriers in place, but that doesn't mean this will always be the case.
How do you deal with it? By working with them in therapy... developing communication and information sharing. They don't ever plan on integrating... yet. With good therapy this can change.

Wanting to integrate is a personal choice.

happens to me all the time, so its normal for me

Happens to me, too. Though less now than before.

What to do about it? Therapy seems to be the only choice if you want things to change. The most effective treatment for me has been brain spotting, which is kind of a blend between EMDR and SE.

You don't have to integrate to be co-conscious. In other words, you can learn to be aware of what is going on with more than one part at the same time. For example, I am now able to say that Marie feels a little lost, Korina feels strong, most of the others feel bad for my t whose brother just died. I learned to be co conscious with talk therapy. I am not completely co conscious now, but am a lot of the time. I have been in therapy for 9 years and so far only 2 parts have integrated. They just did it without me really noticing until it was done. I do not have the goal of integrating, although that is fine if it happens. My goal is to not lose time and to not switch in public. Which sounds like it might be your goal also.