[TrailRunner14]

Question. Are these three basically the same?

The reason I am asking, is that I am trying to figure out why my hands haven't seemed like mine this past week. I "know" they ARE mine, but it's as if I'm looking at them through another perspective. Like I'm watching someone else's hands do what they are doing. Like I'm missing a "connection" to them.

Does that make sense?

I feel like a passenger, looking at my hands "through" something.

Is that because there are two parts of me, blended together, right now? Is it just depersonalization? I would guess that co-conscious is another word for blending.

I would value any thoughts or opinions.

[Luce]

I wouldn't think it is co-consciousness because that implies a joint awareness of eachother... just doesn't seem to fit. I would say blending, I guess.
We have stuff like this happen at times too. I have called it co-presence in the past, I think??

[finding_my_way]

for me, depersonalization/derealization is when things don't feel real, i don't feel real, etc. but don't necessarily feel/hear one of the others there at that time..if things feel off inside at the same time, i can figure out something is happening inside. but sometimes that type of dissociation can occur from anxiety/stress and not always be related to one of the others/DID.

co-consciousness for me feels different (though they can also overlap at times), and i can feel/hear one of the others and get confused sometimes who i am because there isn't that separation if they are mixed with me (blending). co-consciousness i think i've had a few times where i was behind one of the others and could see what was happening, so not blended with them like other times.

it can be confusing to figure out what is what and what might overlap with what.

[TrailRunner14]

Ok. That makes sense. Co-presence would be the "feeling" of what's going on. To experience the feeling of another part being there, but no conscious (mental) connection to it. ?

Co-conscious would mean that I would "know" there is another part layered with me and have a conscious connection with it. ?

I'm trying to understand.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by TrailRunner14

Question. Are these three basically the same?

The reason I am asking, is that I am trying to figure out why my hands haven't seemed like mine this past week. I "know" they ARE mine, but it's as if I'm looking at them through another perspective. Like I'm watching someone else's hands do what they are doing. Like I'm missing a "connection" to them.

Does that make sense?

I feel like a passenger, looking at my hands "through" something.

Is that because there are two parts of me, blended together, right now? Is it just depersonalization? I would guess that co-conscious is another word for blending.

I would value any thoughts or opinions.

different locations have different definitions of each of these.

in my location depersonalization is what you see in my dissociation link at the bottom of my post.

blending in my location is the same thing as integration... everything that was the alters is now mine.there is no difference. just like a normal person again.

example looking at my hand and thinking wow my hand looks normal, rainy and my hand together looks like I always imagined my hand to look like that finger point used to be a rainy mannerism now its mine because she is me.., wow I have never felt this emotion before, this used to be a rainy emotion and now its my emotion.

co consciousness in my location is having thoughts, feelings, images, but knowing they are not your own....a perception thing\ reality remains intact thing...

example when co conscious with Rainy I would look at my hands and know that was rainy's hand, have a feeling of fear and my thought was Rainy is afraid, not I am afraid and not doing know who is afraid, and not wonder who's hand that is.

depersonalization is like feeling numb, spaced out, when I look at my hand it looks a bit strange but I know its my hand. thought weird I can see my hand but I cant feel it, it feels like theres nothing there I see the hang nail in the corner but cant feel the pain where I pulled that hang nail. I can see my hand is cold because the fingernail is slightly white and my hand is that cold reddish blue of coming in from the cold but I cant feel the coldness in my hand.

my suggestion if you cant tell the differences in you, its best to contact your own treatment providers, they will be able to tell you what the different definitions are in your location and help you to discover what the problem is called in you

[elevatedsoul]

i get this feeling all the time

maybe it you just becoming aware ?

[finding_my_way]

blending (which i think is also called co-fronting/co-presence) is being in the same space as another part at the same time. for me, that is when i feel or hear them and can't always figure out what is from them and what is from me since we are so smooshed together.

co-conscious is where you are either fronting with a part nearby, behind, etc. you or you are behind them and able to see/hear what is going on but not control it. for me, i can still feel their feelings to a degree, but they can be more separate. i just can't control things like i usually am able to. that also includes hearing some of them talk, things coming out of my mouth when i'm pushed backwards inside for a few seconds and then back in control.

The crazy thing about co-conscious is when Others work for the same goal or thought as you....you see an Other doing what you would be doing....yes?

So I second hand watch what I would be doing even though an Other is on it. Of course a touch of co-con and co-presenting (c0-fronting) is taking place.

And also...when I dp/dr....my body parts are not mine? I lose feeling and any connection to them...but that's just a feeling in a visual way.

With co-presenting....I can feel the hands but it's like it's not in my control but is?

Omg DID is a mind screw.

[finding_my_way]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

The crazy thing about co-conscious is when Others work for the same goal or thought as you....you see an Other doing what you would be doing....yes?

So I second hand watch what I would be doing even though an Other is on it. Of course a touch of co-con and co-presenting (c0-fronting) is taking place.

And also...when I dp/dr....my body parts are not mine? I lose feeling and any connection to them...but that's just a feeling in a visual way.

With co-presenting....I can feel the hands but it's like it's not in my control but is?

Omg DID is a mind screw.

that reminded me of recently when i was talking to someone about a part who hates me. i started laughing cuz i was thinking so, since they are part of me, they are me. i don't hate me, but they hate me...so, that means i hate myself? it was just..like..wow lol

[ruh roh]

I believe those are different things. What you describe does not sound like co-consciousness--which I think of as experiencing more than one thought process or way of perceiving the world at the same time. One is in control, or shares control with another, but there's no amnesia. What you describe sounds more like depersonalization or derealization (those are two different things, but I don't know which is which).

For me, being co-conscious is when I am aware that one of us (not me) is reacting to a trigger that brings them forward. If I were to feel my hands as not mine, I would think that's something else.

Do you know if there was something that preceded the feeling of not seeing your hands as part of you? Is the feeling constant?

Originally Posted by finding_my_way

that reminded me of recently when i was talking to someone about a part who hates me. i started laughing cuz i was thinking so, since they are part of me, they are me. i don't hate me, but they hate me...so, that means i hate myself? it was just..like..wow lol

Oh ya sweety....I have abusers that hate us/me...but I guess you can find humor in it...lol

[Luce]

Ah well, seems like we're all in agreement that dissociation is just freaking weird!

[TrailRunner14]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

The crazy thing about co-conscious is when Others work for the same goal or thought as you....you see an Other doing what you would be doing....yes?

So I second hand watch what I would be doing even though an Other is on it. Of course a touch of co-con and co-presenting (c0-fronting) is taking place.

And also...when I dp/dr....my body parts are not mine? I lose feeling and any connection to them...but that's just a feeling in a visual way.

With co-presenting....I can feel the hands but it's like it's not in my control but is?

Omg DID is a mind screw.

What your are describing sounds familiar to me. My hands not belonging to me is so hard to put into words.

They are mine. I know it, they just don't look like they belong to "me" - "me" as in the one looking through my eyes at them.

I'm not sure what co-presenting is.

This is so flippin confusing to try to understand or put words to.

[TrailRunner14]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

I believe those are different things. What you describe does not sound like co-consciousness--which I think of as experiencing more than one thought process or way of perceiving the world at the same time. One is in control, or shares control with another, but there's no amnesia. What you describe sounds more like depersonalization or derealization (those are two different things, but I don't know which is which).

For me, being co-conscious is when I am aware that one of us (not me) is reacting to a trigger that brings them forward. If I were to feel my hands as not mine, I would think that's something else.

Do you know if there was something that preceded the feeling of not seeing your hands as part of you? Is the feeling constant?

There was the "chair thing" that happened a couple of weeks ago in my counselors office. I walked in and something wasn't right. Something felt off. We talked and realized the chair he was sitting in, was not the chair that I remembered in his office. I believe that was the beginning of this rabbit hole.

The week after that, a part of me came out in response to something I shared with him. There was an actual visceral feeling of emotion and tears. As soon as it was there, it was gone and it felt like it was covered by something else. Something numb.

The holiday weekend brought a not so happy time with my mom. It triggered me and I don't believe I recovered myself.

Tonight was my appt with my counselor. On the way there I was thinking through all of this and thinking about what I wanted to talk with him about. I looked, from driving, and had no idea where I was. I figured out that I was at a dead end of the road that I should have taken a left turn on to his office. I thank God for the dead end.

We talked about it when I got to his office. There is a memory blank in there that scares me!! I do not have memory of that happening to me before.

Originally Posted by TrailRunner14

What your are describing sounds familiar to me. My hands not belonging to me is so hard to put into words.

They are mine. I know it, they just don't look like they belong to "me" - "me" as in the one looking through my eyes at them.

I'm not sure what co-presenting is.

This is so flippin confusing to try to understand or put words to.

Well, it soubds like dp/dr...because when I say that they don't appear to be mine....it's because it's not under my control doing it's own gestures, like I never talked with hand gestures but they are gesturing away.

When my hands doesn't feel real...dp....I look at my surroundings which usually doesn't feel real either....DR.

[ruh roh]

Okay, so your mom is a trigger for dissociating? So is mine. The work for me is to limit contact and prepare everyone ahead of time for staying back when we do have to interact. It is very slow work. It helps to identify who is being triggered, though, because then you can figure out what they need.

[TrailRunner14]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

Okay, so your mom is a trigger for dissociating? So is mine. The work for me is to limit contact and prepare everyone ahead of time for staying back when we do have to interact. It is very slow work. It helps to identify who is being triggered, though, because then you can figure out what they need.

My mom is definitely a trigger. I believe she triggers all my parts, and I am a chameleon anytime I am around her. It seems to be worse, as I am learning about the different parts of me and why they are who they are.

Lots of anger and hurt connected to it. She actually gaslighted me Thanksgiving, and I'm trying to work myself through it and figure this out.

I am feeling like a part of me that was acknowledged last week is more "in front" and I'm maybe "seeing" through that part? That would maybe explain why my hands look like someone else's? I feel them, it's not like they are numb, they just don't seem to be a part of the one looking through my eyes.

My brain hurts!!!

Does this happen often? Try grounding techniques when this happens. I like to distract and focus on an object noting it's color, shape, size, origin, composition make-up, history, feel...

Stores with all it's bright colors and sounds triggers me....so I roam around reading labels till I'm able to shop. Lol

[TrailRunner14]

Thank you!

I will try to remember to try that. Usually I'm kind of floating when it happens and I notice it, without too much thought to disconnect from it. It's really kind of a dreamy feeling that I'm watching, separated from.

I completely understand the stores with the bright lights and sounds. I have the same reaction when there is too much input. It's like an overload and I can't think or remember what I'm there for.

We needed a bottle of dishwashing liquid not long ago. I went to the Dollar Store to get it, bought things that we already had at home and didn't realize I didn't get what I went for until after I got home. I actually did that 2 more times, then I realized it might help if I wrote it on a piece of paper and took it with me. I got home with it that time. lol!

[Luce]

Originally Posted by TrailRunner14

Thank you!

I completely understand the stores with the bright lights and sounds. I have the same reaction when there is too much input. It's like an overload and I can't think or remember what I'm there for.

We needed a bottle of dishwashing liquid not long ago. I went to the Dollar Store to get it, bought things that we already had at home and didn't realize I didn't get what I went for until after I got home. I actually did that 2 more times, then I realized it might help if I wrote it on a piece of paper and took it with me. I got home with it that time. lol!

I am the same in stores... I find being out and about in town so overwhelming and dissociative. I often end up wandering around in a switchy and traumatized daze and end up with the wrong things or nothing at all.
Recently we tried the tapping trick that new T taught us while we were in town and it really helped - a few minutes after tapping I realized I was clear headed and grounded. I adapted it a little for 'public use'.... with one open hand I tapped alternate sides with thumb on one side and fingers on the other, in time to the music played over the sound system. Sneaky.

Originally Posted by TrailRunner14

Thank you!

I will try to remember to try that. Usually I'm kind of floating when it happens and I notice it, without too much thought to disconnect from it. It's really kind of a dreamy feeling that I'm watching, separated from.

I completely understand the stores with the bright lights and sounds. I have the same reaction when there is too much input. It's like an overload and I can't think or remember what I'm there for.

We needed a bottle of dishwashing liquid not long ago. I went to the Dollar Store to get it, bought things that we already had at home and didn't realize I didn't get what I went for until after I got home. I actually did that 2 more times, then I realized it might help if I wrote it on a piece of paper and took it with me. I got home with it that time. lol!

I got to make a shopping list in my iphone because when we walk into a store....the mind goes blank. We tend to purchase things that aren't on our original mental list till we made our smart phone our memory, lol.