We went to 5 meetings in 4 days of sobriety and was hoping our system would settle down. Not happening.

We are experiencing an hours worth of 'revolving door' switching anywhere from 1/2-2 second intervals for an hour. This amounts to tons of missing memories and time. I will hear 2-3 words then gone. It's amazing how fast an hour can fly by. It's also very uncomfortable and we can't even sit still- too obvious. After the meeting for the rest of the night we are exhausted. I might as well drink...at least thats's fun... not.

We are done drinking because we are beginning to have fun sober. This only happens there for we are fine all day. Ho hum....

Oh, needless to say...no more meetings for us. It's creating the turmoil that got us drinking in the first place.

[amandalouise]

heres a suggestion lots of people that I know who go to AA take a friend with them. friends are allowed to go to AA with the one that is getting sober, AA welcomes any support network a person may have. this way you can have someone you know and trust there with you and can help you practice your grounding...

example one person I know holds their friends hand during AA. this way they can give support through hand holding, giving each other's hand a light squeeze, ...

another person I know who goes to AA takes a palm sized stone with them to hold. every time they get triggered they rub and manipulate the stone as a reminder to breath and be here now.

Another person i know who goes to AA takes in a refreshing ice cold bottle of water or other non alcoholic beverage. when they get triggered they take a sip of the cold water or beverage to remind their self to stay present in the moment, to focus on their surroundings and those around them.

maybe you can contact your treatment providers, let them know what is happening and why you and your system are triggered into this revolving door affect during AA, maybe they can help you to develop a treatment plan that will help you to stay present during AA rather than dissociating from one to another.

[whispers_inthedark]

If you've been drinking for a long period of time consider rehab. there's a chance that part of the reason you're experiencing so much disruption over the past four days is because your whole body is just trying to cope with the new physical situation. Good luck with whatever happens, and congrats on the four days!

Originally Posted by whispers_inthedark

If you've been drinking for a long period of time consider rehab. there's a chance that part of the reason you're experiencing so much disruption over the past four days is because your whole body is just trying to cope with the new physical situation. Good luck with whatever happens, and congrats on the four days!

I would if I could but shan't cause I can't.

Its just people, places and things that drives us batty. There's no real control really, no way to ground, no base...

Got to go. Carpenter getting irritated.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm allergic to rather a lot of "normal" people.

I do not like the way they try to force me into a box in their mind and think they know me......grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Normal people do not get it that I'm a bear. I'm tired of having to pretend I'm a freakin human

I just quit going.... I don't know anyone to go with, and a rock is not going to do it.

It is stronger and more intense then I can handle. The Others all want to say something, some are scared, anxiety is off the charts, it's too dizzy of a ride. We're 6 days now and we're gonna go it alone.

[yagr]

AlwaysChanging,

I am an alcoholic/addict who, barring anything unforeseen will be celebrating twenty-five years clean and sober in a couple of weeks (May 10th). We don't go to meetings any longer either. I'm not sure that we have identical reasons but there certainly are similarities with what you shared. We switched an awful lot during the early days although, for us, it led to a better understanding of our condition and eighteen months in our first moments of co-consciousness with a little.

Fuzzybear's post really resonated with me - I didn't fit in the box. Another issue was the religious aspect of meetings. It is less in some places but the area that I live in, for instance, reads from the Bible in every meeting. I will say this though, that while meetings weren't for me, I did use the steps to a positive advantage for us. In fact, I walked my little through the fourth step with extraordinary results. She, and as a result we, benefited much more than I would have thought possible.

Anyway, to the point, I for one support whatever path you take and understand that not all paths fit all people. We wish you well.

Originally Posted by yagr

AlwaysChanging,

I am an alcoholic/addict who, barring anything unforeseen will be celebrating twenty-five years clean and sober in a couple of weeks (May 10th). We don't go to meetings any longer either. I'm not sure that we have identical reasons but there certainly are similarities with what you shared. We switched an awful lot during the early days although, for us, it led to a better understanding of our condition and eighteen months in our first moments of co-consciousness with a little.

Fuzzybear's post really resonated with me - I didn't fit in the box. Another issue was the religious aspect of meetings. It is less in some places but the area that I live in, for instance, reads from the Bible in every meeting. I will say this though, that while meetings weren't for me, I did use the steps to a positive advantage for us. In fact, I walked my little through the fourth step with extraordinary results. She, and as a result we, benefited much more than I would have thought possible.

Anyway, to the point, I for one support whatever path you take and understand that not all paths fit all people. We wish you well.

Thank you for your reply and congratulations on your 25 years....

I went to meetings for several years years ago....had anxiety but not to whats happening today. But today though...we know what we are- a multiple, and with this knowledge our system has individualized and become unstabile (every alter for themself kind of thing).

Here it's just a spiritual approach to living and religion is not part of the program.

I think outing ourself we now feel like a bug on a pin.

Maybe in the coming months or days we can try again.

I do want to go...but we are scared.