I don't know if i'm over reacting or not (it seems a really small issue to most people, I guess), but i'm 30 and i've never been on the swings.

i've never even been to a park to feed ducks.

this all seemed to hit home yesterday for some unknown reason.

I really want to go on the swings and I want to feed the ducks

like really badly

ah childhood neglect... I hate it

[anais_anais]

You should go on the swings I am almost 30 and I still do it sometimes. They are really fun, just sometimes make me a little dizzy if I do it too much.

And it's perfect duck feeding time, spring. It's really funny to feed them a cereal we have in the US called Cheerios, I don't know if you have it where you are. But the ducks go crazy for it! They all wiggle around trying to get the cereal bits as fast as they can.

[anais_anais]

I did swing and feed the ducks when I was little... but there are a lot of other things I never got to do and those also make me very sad. It isn't overreacting.

so go on some swings at a park and feed the ducks I do that often.

[amandalouise]

all kinds of people go on the swings....children, teens and yes even adults.. if you want to go on the swings and feed the ducks you can.

heres one situation in my life where I swing.... sometimes when I and another adult (my wife) are talking we take a walk to the park. while talking we naturally sit down somewhere and sometimes we sit on the swings and talk. well sometimes during this one or the other of us starts moving back and forth, just slightly then soon we are in full blown swinging while we are laughing and talking. movement is part of life and swinging feels great. my wife and I do the same thing with feeding the ducks...

suggestion maybe you and a friend can go for a walk and just happen to be walking in the park feeding ducks or swinging on the swings in the park or play ground.

Originally Posted by anais_anais

You should go on the swings I am almost 30 and I still do it sometimes. They are really fun, just sometimes make me a little dizzy if I do it too much.

And it's perfect duck feeding time, spring. It's really funny to feed them a cereal we have in the US called Cheerios, I don't know if you have it where you are. But the ducks go crazy for it! They all wiggle around trying to get the cereal bits as fast as they can.

this post braught me inspiration for some reason.

it's nice knowing i've not missed the chance to do these things

just hard to cope with never having done them as a kid

(name me other children who have never been on a swing set?)

and i'm sorry for posting this.

really petty thread, I know. when I went to create it, I wanted it to be more about how I thought my childhood was wasted and stolen ffrom me.

in sted I posted this

[anais_anais]

I didn't think it was petty at all. It felt important to me...

Because I do the same thing.... the emotions about the experience are too much, so instead, I would get upset about the little things I never was allowed to do. It's why I bought a ton of Easter candy I couldn't possibly eat.

I still hope you try out the swings and feed the ducks.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

(name me other children who have never been on a swing set?)

I know a lot of people who never been on a swing set as a child...for one me.I was always too afraid of heights to go on a swing as a child, my favorite was anything that kept my feet firmly planted on the very still not moving ground.

others that I know who have never been on a swing set as a child had chronic ear infections where they had vertigo, others got car sick from the back and forth motion, and still others their parents did not allow them on it due to fear of falling off and still others just had no interest as a child in swing sets, their interests were elsewhere (gymnastics baseball and other sports, hunting, cops and robbers, playing harry potter, other childhood games or just surviving because of being too shy to play with others or other survival reasons, or they were what my location calls loners where they preferred to play by their self rather than with their peers on a swing set....)

my point please dont beat yourself up over this not going on swing sets as a child shows nothing, it doesnot point to being a lesser person or something is wrong with you, it just says you have never been on a swing set just like I know people who have never been on a teeter totter or gone swimming or slid down a slid or played in the mud.

its not an impossible to fix situation. you can if you want to go find a swing set now and swing if you want to, then decide if its something you like and want to continue doing. just like someone who has never learned to swim as a child can now as an adult learn to swim. who knows maybe going to a swing set and swinging now as an adult will jog your memory as to why you never did that as a child and allow you to stop beating your self up about it.

[yagr]

I understand your feelings of loss. Though swings were not something that I missed, I'm sure all of us here have had childhoods with loss - if only the joy of living without fear. I agree with everyone else who said that it is a great idea to go swing now, but understand that the loss is still there. We can't go back but we can enjoy the swings (and everything else) differently now.

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

I don't know if i'm over reacting or not (it seems a really small issue to most people, I guess), but i'm 30 and i've never been on the swings.

i've never even been to a park to feed ducks.

this all seemed to hit home yesterday for some unknown reason.

I really want to go on the swings and I want to feed the ducks

like really badly

ah childhood neglect... I hate it

Yes I would go to...like a Toy's R Us kid....we never grow up!

I was sitting at a Sonic drive-up and a duck sat by truck window wagging it's tail begging. So we shared a bit of burritto lol

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by yagr

I understand your feelings of loss. Though swings were not something that I missed, I'm sure all of us here have had childhoods with loss - if only the joy of living without fear. I agree with everyone else who said that it is a great idea to go swing now, but understand that the loss is still there. We can't go back but we can enjoy the swings (and everything else) differently now.

I have found we can go back and relive childhood activities the same way that we would have the first time.

example one time I told my therapist I was upset that I had never gone on a merry go around, or played tag. she told me ok lets go do those things. I laughed and told her it wouldn't be the same now that I was an adult. She said it is only not the same if you think its not the same... any adult regardless of mental or physical challenges can experience the wonders of childhood in the same ways that children do. all it takes is opening one self up to the whole experience.. dont do the childhood activity using the adult logical mind of noticing all that can go wrong, and other adult like perspectives. to look at the situation like you would any other first time situation. remember that gut feelings of excitement and wonder that you felt the first time you went to a bar at age 21. that same feeling is what children feel when doing things for the first time. remember that gut excitement and oh wow this is going to be so cool with a slight fear the first time you as an adult traveled somewhere, remember that gut feeling of excitement and wonder from every time you go to a store and buy your self or someone else something.... those same gut feelings are what you would have felt as a child when doing something fun, exciting and a bit fearful... bottom line is the brain is something that is there in a persons body for their whole life so how a person feels is how they will feel those feelings all their life, excitement will feel the same way in the same person whether they are a child or an adult. the difference is how we go about controlling those feelings and how we go about expressing those feelings. people can throw caution to the wind and just let their self go and experience a going on the merry go around or play tag with out censoring their emotions. they can take in all the wonder, and excitement of everything that playing on a merry go around can give.

At first I didnt believe my therapist but then we went to a playground and got on a merry go around. at first I was a bit reserved.. Im an adult on a child playground equipment I must look strange and my therapist said hey get rid of the adult judgements and just play, look at the colors arent they "neat" listen to the sound we are making while going around and around we are whistling and she throws up her arm and leans outwards, drag your hand along the sand as we go around bet I can make a train track... on and on we played and suddenly I noticed I was having the same feelings I did when I was a child when I was playing a favorite game and I was experiencing the activity from a childs perspective of joy, excitement, and it increased when my therapist jumped off the merry go round "tagged" me and said "your it" there we were two adult women in the park running around like children playing tag and having every bit of every one of my senses and emotions experiencing it identical to what I would have as a child. how did I know this because I had some good memories of my childhood to compare it to. for two hours that day I played on the merry go around and played tag just like any other child in the world.

afterwards my treatment provider explained to me the therapy concept of the child with in... that every human being has a part of their self where they feel and express things in a childs way. most people learn how to control their self and conform to the ways of society, rules, laws but because we have already experienced childhood our brains have those memories and emotions. those never go away. Sometimes they come out in good ways like how a person feels and expresses their self on special occasions and other times these child like qualities everyone has comes out in a wrong way like when humans have the urge to throw a temper tantrum out of anger,

then she told me as a person with DID I had an extra edge on being able to experience things for the first time like i would have had I done those things as a child.... I had child alters who did child things. why else was there dolls, stuffed animals, board games like candy land and shoots and ladders, coloring books crayons and so forth around my home.

I tell you I had the best day and I still find things that I have never done as a child and I go out and do them. one of the reasons why my wife and I go to the north pole NY every winter is to enjoy that child like feelings/ emotions and such...

yes I firmly believe a person can do anything they want and feel like the child they once were at the same time with out the adult side of things interfering, it just takes being open to doing so.

[yagr]

Originally Posted by yagr

I understand your feelings of loss. Though swings were not something that I missed, I'm sure all of us here have had childhoods with loss - if only the joy of living without fear. I agree with everyone else who said that it is a great idea to go swing now, but I understand that the loss is still there. We can't go back but we can enjoy the swings (and everything else) differently now.

Originally Posted by amandalouise

I have found we can go back and relive childhood activities the same way that we would have the first time.

What do you know, I was wrong again.