have any of you on here ever had to deal with a triggery christmas gift?

thing is

Possible trigger:

someone sent me a gift- it's a light up santa.

no harm in that, right?

apart from the fact that when you press the button to light him up, the top of it lights up like a sparkeler (like in fireworks), and fire well.... is a massive trigger for me- especially those little sparkler things. urg.

anyway now I'm getting emails from this person.. do you like it?. do you like it?.

I want to tell them no, I don't, I'm looking at it in utter disgust

but I can't bring myself to do that.. they did make the effert to get me something

but if I have to see this monster of a santa one more time

Possible trigger:

I am banging my entire body against a wall until I bleed.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

have any of you on here ever had to deal with a triggery christmas gift?

thing is

Possible trigger:

someone sent me a gift- it's a light up santa.

no harm in that, right?

apart from the fact that when you press the button to light him up, the top of it lights up like a sparkeler (like in fireworks), and fire well.... is a massive trigger for me- especially those little sparkler things. urg.

anyway now I'm getting emails from this person.. do you like it?. do you like it?.

I want to tell them no, I don't, I'm looking at it in utter disgust

but I can't bring myself to do that.. they did make the effert to get me something

but if I have to see this monster of a santa one more time

Possible trigger:

I am banging my entire body against a wall until I bleed.

since you stated what triggers you is after pushing the button it lights up in a way that you dont like, and you stated no harm there in telling what it is before pushing the button adding the statement no harm there....

can i assume in its normal state (button not pushed) it is nice and not triggering....

reason I ask is if you like it with out pushing the button why push the button. and just remove the battery and tell your friend that the santa is nice but the sparkling action is a bit to bright so you prefer to have it turned off.

thats what I do when ever someone gives me action type figures where the item does something like... lights up or walks or talks in a strange voice... I just dont push the button, remove the battery and politely thank them for the gift.

I think of it like being here on psych central if something is triggering I dont have to read it. I can like some parts of a persons post and reply to that and pay no mind to the rest of the post that I dont like...

if I dont like the lighting up action on a gift I just dont use the light up action.

[Loose Screw x 2]

There is a DC Comics character who is also afraid of fire. He is super strong and a shape shifter with other abilities. Fire is his only weakness. He's also very gentle. He's Martian Manhunter and the last living person from Mars.

[Amyjay]

I am sorry it is triggering for you. Can you just put it away somewhere and just say a simple thank you to the person. It was likely meant with good intention and is neither your fault nor theirs that its triggering for you. But you can take care of yourself by putting it away somewhere where you don't have to be triggered by it anymore.
I have received very triggering gifts from people before, some that were very inappropriate. Once as an adult my ex step father gave me a (very inappropriate and might be very triggering)

Possible trigger:

sex toy

for Christmas which I unwittingly opened in front of my entire extended family. Why he ever thought that was appropriate I'll never know.
How did I respond? I don't even know, I dissociated it of course. I only remembered that years later and other family members remembered it too, so at least I know that was real.
Just take care of yourself. Put it away. I'm sorry it was hard for you.

[Loose Screw x 2]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

Once as an adult my ex step father gave me a (very inappropriate and might be very triggering)

Possible trigger:

sex toy

for Christmas which I unwittingly opened in front of my entire extended family.

How horrible!! What a sick thing to do to someone in your family! That is disgusting!

Originally Posted by Amyjay

How did I respond? I don't even know, I dissociated it of course.

Well, I would think so. Some people are just twisted.

Originally Posted by Amyjay

I only remembered that years later and other family members remembered it too, so at least I know that was real.

What an awful memory that must be for you.

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by MavriforceK9r

What an awful memory that must be for you.

Not really. I have hardly ever even thought about it, and the handful of times I have the emotion about it that I am sure exists somewhere in here is still dissociated from me. As far as "inappropriate" and "family" goes that incident was merely a drop in a very vast ocean of much more severe abuse.

Originally Posted by Amyjay

I am sorry it is triggering for you. Can you just put it away somewhere and just say a simple thank you to the person. It was likely meant with good intention and is neither your fault nor theirs that its triggering for you. But you can take care of yourself by putting it away somewhere where you don't have to be triggered by it anymore.
I have received very triggering gifts from people before, some that were very inappropriate. Once as an adult my ex step father gave me a (very inappropriate and might be very triggering)

Possible trigger:

sex toy

for Christmas which I unwittingly opened in front of my entire extended family. Why he ever thought that was appropriate I'll never know.
How did I respond? I don't even know, I dissociated it of course. I only remembered that years later and other family members remembered it too, so at least I know that was real.
Just take care of yourself. Put it away. I'm sorry it was hard for you.

he got you a........ jesus!

Possible trigger:

I don't understand why those exist in all honesty.

who, in their right mind, would want to play with... well, one of those things

in the UK, on tv, their is constantly a comercial about a website where you can buy them

" join millions of others and get started right away"

why,

why why why why why.

go put it in the trash. get it out of the house. then go do something nice for your self , and dont let one stupid persons stupid gift ruin your day. dont let that dumb gift have so much power over you.

Dated a guy years ago who was an eskimo. Learnt a lot from him. They are nomadic. That's why all their art, ie, fits in the palm of their hand. Had to be transported. He taught me if you receive a gift you don't like, won't use... it is ok to pass it on to someone who will. Tell this person that a child loved it so much that u had to pass it on, then donate it to toys for tots or thrift store. Or to a neighbor that will happily add it to their collection. You can also give it to a non-mutual friend who you think will like it. It won't go unappreciated & you can thank your giftor for taking the time & effort involved.And it will be out of your house!!







QUOTE=shattered sanity;5944015]have any of you on here ever had to deal with a triggery christmas gift?

thing is

Possible trigger:

someone sent me a gift- it's a light up santa.

no harm in that, right?

apart from the fact that when you press the button to light him up, the top of it lights up like a sparkeler (like in fireworks), and fire well.... is a massive trigger for me- especially those little sparkler things. urg.

anyway now I'm getting emails from this person.. do you like it?. do you like it?.

I want to tell them no, I don't, I'm looking at it in utter disgust

but I can't bring myself to do that.. they did make the effert to get me something

but if I have to see this monster of a santa one more time

Possible trigger:

I am banging my entire body against a wall until I bleed.

[/QUOTE]

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

he got you a........ jesus!

Possible trigger:

I don't understand why those exist in all honesty.

who, in their right mind, would want to play with... well, one of those things

in the UK, on tv, their is constantly a comercial about a website where you can buy them

" join millions of others and get started right away"

why,

why why why why why.

while takig a quick break from our christmas festivities I thought I would come in and read a bit while regrounding...I read what you put inside the trigger icon... I got such a present this year. there is nothing wrong with getting such toys. they can be quite helpful in relationships or self enjoyment. you can find more about gifts like this in the sexual forums here https://forums.psychcentral.com/sexual-gender-issues/

that said the orignal poster did not receive such a sexual toy the original posters toy was a light up santa. I dont see any reason to throw it away if they like the santa without the lights, just dont push the button that makes the santa light up and sparkle. I have done that many times with gifts that I enjoy but do not like the light up feature. I have also done whats now called "regifting" where a gift I have received from someone, would fit another friend better and have re wrapped the gift and gave it to another friend. my friends and I have a "regifting" circle where we see how many time the same gift can be regifted in one christmas season and who ultimately ends up with the gift. we never know whether the item is a regift until after christmas and we compare notes on who regifted what lol one christmas we all actually regifted the same christmas gift around the circle lol

[Loose Screw x 2]

Originally Posted by cavaliers

Dated a guy years ago who was an eskimo. Learnt a lot from him. They are nomadic. That's why all their art, ie, fits in the palm of their hand. Had to be transported. He taught me if you receive a gift you don't like, won't use... it is ok to pass it on to someone who will. Tell this person that a child loved it so much that u had to pass it on, then donate it to toys for tots or thrift store. Or to a neighbor that will happily add it to their collection. You can also give it to a non-mutual friend who you think will like it. It won't go unappreciated & you can thank your giftor for taking the time & effort involved.And it will be out of your house!!

This is a good idea. On a lighter note, I got a 5 dollar bill for Christmas that triggered me to walk down to the store and by something I wanted.

[Fuzzybear]

I suggest throwing it away, and if the person asks again, just say a simple thank you
(Hopefully they won’t keep asking ... )

Originally Posted by amandalouise

while takig a quick break from our christmas festivities I thought I would come in and read a bit while regrounding...I read what you put inside the trigger icon... I got such a present this year. there is nothing wrong with getting such toys. they can be quite helpful in relationships or self enjoyment. you can find more about gifts like this in the sexual forums here https://forums.psychcentral.com/sexual-gender-issues/

that said the orignal poster did not receive such a sexual toy the original posters toy was a light up santa. I dont see any reason to throw it away if they like the santa without the lights, just dont push the button that makes the santa light up and sparkle. I have done that many times with gifts that I enjoy but do not like the light up feature. I have also done whats now called "regifting" where a gift I have received from someone, would fit another friend better and have re wrapped the gift and gave it to another friend. my friends and I have a "regifting" circle where we see how many time the same gift can be regifted in one christmas season and who ultimately ends up with the gift. we never know whether the item is a regift until after christmas and we compare notes on who regifted what lol one christmas we all actually regifted the same christmas gift around the circle lol

I admit I am now a little curious about these "toys"

not that i'd ever get one, but i'm curious why people enjoy them.

and yes, regifting is a good idea

it's just been sitting on my desk doing nothing for the past week, so it's worth a shot

I don't see much point in keeping it if I don't like the light up feature.
that's like keeping a fan because it looksp pretty, you never plan to turn it on though

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

I admit I am now a little curious about these "toys"

not that i'd ever get one, but i'm curious why people enjoy them.

there are many reasons why my wife and I enjoy them,....

in general though, these kinds of toys come in a variety of items and accessories of many different sizes, shapes colors, flavors, textures, they also come in a variety of sexual orientation and gender identity, some are for beginners just learning about their bodies and what pleases them and others are for more advanced levels of activities and a wide range in between. they can be used alone or with someone else, they can help get the job done or slow down the action, they add a bit of spice and fun to a persons sex life

your own medical doctor can tell you what ones would be best for you should you decide its time for those toys. there are also many websites out there that sell these kinds of toys.

Originally Posted by amandalouise

there are many reasons why my wife and I enjoy them,....

in general though, these kinds of toys come in a variety of items and accessories of many different sizes, shapes colors, flavors, textures, they also come in a variety of sexual orientation and gender identity, some are for beginners just learning about their bodies and what pleases them and others are for more advanced levels of activities and a wide range in between. they can be used alone or with someone else, they can help get the job done or slow down the action, they add a bit of spice and fun to a persons sex life

your own medical doctor can tell you what ones would be best for you should you decide its time for those toys. there are also many websites out there that sell these kinds of toys.

I know of at least one website.

my original post (quoting amyjay's post) mentioned a comercial for those toys, and that was a website.

well, if they work for people, I guess.

not for me.

the whole idea seems.... just...

odd.

being turned on by some plastic toy sounds weird