anyone else frustrated?

as an alter i know nothing in this world will ever truly belong to me and it's not fair!!

Some of our alters have things that belong to them. they are just small things, sure, but they are THEIR things.
Have you talked to other members of your system about how you feel? When we talk to each other and listen to each other we are able to work together much more effectively. Part of working together for us is looking out for each other too. We do our best (our best isn't always very good, but its a work in progress) to find ways to get individual needs met.
Ultimately all individual needs are also a need for the whole.
I don't know what kinds of things you want to belong to you, but. Well, I'm just saying, I don't think it's impossible.

Im not sure what you mean. each of my alters didnt know they were alternate personalities. they functioned just like any other normal human being. they considered their selves to be in this world, doing everything that they did in this world.... let me show you what I mean...

when Betty was in control of my body she participated in this world as if this was her body. she owned her own clothes, toys, went outside and played, had ice cream and PBJ sandwiches, collected leaves and rocks for her own nature collection, she even had her own group of friends. thats what her sense of agency was...

when Rainy was in control of my body, this was her body, she had her own toys, blankets, pajama's, pillow, favorite tv shows, made her own bowl of cereal or sandwich....just like any other human being. she also did not consider herself to be an alternate, she never referred to her self as anything but human, a little girl. and she had her own friends...thats what and who she was her sense of agency

When thelma was in control of my body she considered it to be her body, she went on dates, had her own clothes, make up, jewelry, enjoyed intimacy time with her loves... thats who and what she was, her sense of agency.

each one of my alters to them were nothing different than any other human being fully functioning, enjoying, owning their own things and being one with this world.

my suggestion is talk with a treatment provider, they will be able to help you to discover who you are and how you participate and function in this world and what is called yours in this world. maybe even read some of your past posts will help to remind you how and what you own in this world.

we haven’ t ever had this problem.
we are each our own individual person. there is no main person. we each have our own clothes, books, food, jobs to do, friends, etc. It sounds very frustrating to feel like youre not your own person... I dont think it has to be that way. Maybe you could work something out.

there’s lots of things that aren’t fair but maybe this is one you could see if you can change?

what would you like to own?

I have a personal philosophy or spiritual belief. I believe the practical world is a superficial overlay on a more profound reality. The deeper, profound reality is more "real" to me and the purpose of the " superficial overlay" is to interact with the deeper reality. In the deeper reality there is only connection and love.

Connection of everything: atoms, particles, spirit, energy.
Love of other living beings.

This is all that is present there.

The purpose of my superficial overlay, practical life is to interact with the deeper in a greater way: meaning achieving more love and more connection. That is what is real. In the end we don't really own anything else.

I hope that helps.

like all ready said, our alters have stuff they own..

like for example the littles have dvds and some of the teens have music cds they like.

but I think it goes deeper... we have 2 insiders who don't believe they are part of the system, an think they are actual own people (and that fact bothers them!), the fact they are trapped in a body

This is how DH feels in a way. He's very jealous of me being the host state and wants absolute control over the body himself. I'm glad that it isn't like that because he is cruel and viscious and wants to be a tyrant in the world. If he ever were to find a way to gain full control he would most certainly become a criminal which is why I strain to keep my cool so that it reduces his chances of coming out. He's the only one who has such feelings though so, that's a relief.

EDIT: Sorry you are feeling this way. How long do you usually get to have control when you're out?

A look, a thought, and what got said. A sense of belonging is very important for self control.

my dominate identity carries my daddy's name (arnold ) and is male, aggressive, independent, extroverted , and controlling like my daddy when he abused me.

he owns everything

my submissive identity carries my given name (shyra) and is passive, scared, dependent, introverted, guilty, and depressed witch is normal self

she owns nothing