What do you do when you just feel too tired?
All things are objectively looking up if we just do mountains of work. Just feeling too tired to do it

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry, cavaliers I understand what you mean. It must be very hard for you. Please don't give up. I hope things will get better soon for you. Try to hang on. Remember that things won't stay like this forever. They can and will get better. Don't give up hope! Life can be difficult. I'm sure you're strong. You will get through this. Just try to believe in yourself a bit. Remember that you're stronger than you think. You've got this. You're a wonderful person. Stay strong, cavaliers. Stay safe and take care of yourself. You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this

Take it one day at a time. The good news is things are looking up right? Hang in there. Best of luck to you.

I try to take what I feel and think out of the equation and keep plodding along, drink beer, go to sleep...and let an alter have some time out (like I can let anything).

[Amyjay]

I go to bed.

Thanks everyone. My T said the same thing! This is so against our usual behavior. Just stay home & don't do anything. Let it wait until we can. If you all hadn't said the same thing, I would have ignored it & pressed on.Does anyone else feel guilty if they don't accomplish something? Hear messages like you could at least do the dishes? All 3 of them. If you got three pages of paperwork done that would be less you have to do tomorrow. On & on. Just going to bed is anathema. OK having a beer sounds good! Like turning things over to another. Thanks

[Amyjay]

I think a really important part of healing from complex trauma is self-care. I am getting better at it bit by bit. I know we really do feel a lot better when we look after ourselves and each other.
Someone posted a link to a video about C- PTSD that talked about the parts of the inner critic and the hurt child. (I can't remember where it is on the forum, sorry, someone else might). In the video the guy said the inner critic is the one we most need to quiet, and develop self-compassion for the hurt child instead. In childhood the inner critic pushed us to be perfectionists or whatever in an attempt to not be rejected or to receive as much care as was possible. The one that says "get those three dishes done" or "those three pages of paperwork so you don't have to do it tomorrow" is running off the old trauma script about being good enough/smart enough/achieving enough/or whatever else so you won't lose care. Or to prevent more abuse. It's an old script trying to "whip the child into shape". Kind of like buck up kiddo, toughen up, be good enough, stop being a wimp. Or whatever particular thing you may have been told.
The inner critic doesn't need to do that now. It's okay to give the child (the tiredness/ the overwhelmed part/the hurting part compassion and care. It's okay to rest when you're tired.

It's okay. The sun won't fall out of the sky and the world will keep on turning. You can rest. You can recuperate. You can recharge. Rest is a gift you can give to yourself. Whenever you want it. It's okay to rest.

I know by being raised in abuse...that I learned to hate myself and began self-abusing just because everyone else did.

I’m still learning about self-care...but yet still have parts that feel so undeserving of anything, and when we do treat ourselves...we feel guilty so much that we give away that we have gotten.

Originally Posted by Amyjay

..."those three pages of paperwork so you don't have to do it tomorrow" is running off the old trauma script about being good enough/smart enough/achieving enough/or whatever else so you won't lose care. Or to prevent more abuse. It's an old script trying to "whip the child into shape". Kind of like buck up kiddo, toughen up, be good enough, stop being a wimp. Or whatever particular thing you may have been told. [/I]

Wow that fits! Old trauma message. As we thought about it, we heard another message: if you don't take care of it, you don't deserve to have it. Not just normal people care, absolutely perfect care at all times. If we don't, it will be taken away from us. Thanks so much for pointing this out.