[Lilly2]

Sometimes I trigger myself when I read my own posts. It's as if I was co-conscious when I wrote it, but then when I'm fully present or present with other alters, I'm all of a sudden triggered. I mean the kind of triggers that comprise intrusive thoughts, strange memories, and night terrors (I wake up sweating and freaking out from a nightmare). Sometimes the nightmares make sense, but sometimes they don't.

Does this happen to anyone else?

[Amyjay]

Ho yeah. Not necessarily with posts, because I tend not to write much about my own stuff, but certainly with the journal. Last therapy session we tried to ground ourselves first by reading the latest entries, and instead was triggered into an alter who denies anything happened and has no desire at all to be in therapy. It didn't work out so well for us!
Welcome back.

[Lilly2]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

Ho yeah. Not necessarily with posts, because I tend not to write much about my own stuff, but certainly with the journal. Last therapy session we tried to ground ourselves first by reading the latest entries, and instead was triggered into an alter who denies anything happened and has no desire at all to be in therapy. It didn't work out so well for us!
Welcome back.

@Amyjay (((safe hugs))) I'm sorry you deal with that, too. Journaling was so hard for me that I stopped. And then, I get back online and I was using it kind of like a journal, with my different parts posting as well. I didn't realize how much of what I was posting or responding to in posts were triggering me. It was me triggering me.

I hope your T sessions go better, for you and your system. I get those sessions sometimes. One time, I did dissociate and lose time during "brainspotting," and my T at the VA told me that I flung the headphones to the ground. I don't remember that at all. I actually thought my T was lying. All I remember feeling right before I lost time was this sense of the room spinning and a bunch of yucky memories flooding in. I think I have a part I don't know about, or at least not fully. I'm afraid if that is the case, but I'm also open to welcoming her or him. Whenever that part is around, I can feel it, and I think she/he is scared to say a lot of things, too.

There are fragments who, along with me, just want to deny everything and work on "simple" stuff. Only, the stuff I work on in session is never that simple, and those things always lead to the stuff I dont want to talk about. It's hard to ground when I feel that way.

I hope you and your system can feel safe and grounded while in session.

(((safe hugs)))

[Lilly2]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

Ho yeah. Not necessarily with posts, because I tend not to write much about my own stuff, but certainly with the journal. Last therapy session we tried to ground ourselves first by reading the latest entries, and instead was triggered into an alter who denies anything happened and has no desire at all to be in therapy. It didn't work out so well for us!
Welcome back.

@Amyjay

Oh yeah, almost forgot. Thank you for the welcome back.

[lizardlady]

First time I read a post my Little One left in a forum I didn't believe it was really mine. I was convinced someone was posting under my username. Thought I'd been hacked.

[MtnTime2896]

I rarely read my posts after they're made. Even now, I'm co-conscious (almost like a "just in case I take a peak"). And, honestly, I don't seem to host anymore *shrug*. That's mostly MT, now.

So, yeah, I get it.

-AK