[stahrgeyzer]

I know I've presently age slid to teen Paul but big Paul wants this also. Is there anyone who wants to be friends who likes to exchange private messages or even meet every so often? Innocent safe normal no touching friendship only. I'm soooo lonely. I presently live in southern California.

[Breaking Dawn]

What about your spiritual friend Em that you email with?

[stahrgeyzer]

I stopped emailing because sometimes it felt like I was a burden type of friend with my trauma and disorders. I think she would be happier without me. That's why I'd like to find friends who are more like me.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

I stopped emailing because sometimes it felt like I was a burden type of friend with my trauma and disorders. I think she would be happier without me. That's why I'd like to find friends who are more like me.

Oh, my goodness! What if it isn't anything like that? Anyway, maybe one/some of us can be friends sometimes? But
I am such a weird person. I hope you find your special friends soon!

[stahrgeyzer]

@Breaking Dawn You don't seem weird to me at all. When I'm alone for some reason I age slide, usually into little Paul who's about 7 yo, sometimes teen Paul. That seems weird to me.

[Breaking Dawn]

But, @stahrgeyzer, many others experience similar lives, as you can see by our special forums here, & the recognized category of DID. I keep reading all kinds of articles on the internet about DDs, & things like Conversion Disorder. And you've learned new things from your FB groups. So what you describe is becoming better understood, more & more, & picking up speed as new therapists & researchers join the others. There is hope for us. My others are harmful & I pray to find a therapist who can help me. Please don't despair, stahrgeyzer.

[stahrgeyzer]

@Breaking Dawn I'm interested in learning about parts who are harmful. People don't seem to talk much about that but it's very real for some people. Although I don't want to even say it, I'm afraid I have something inside of me that's very damaged and angry. It's scary to think it might be real. Maybe yours lash out through voices. Mine lashes out by taking control of the body at night during sleep, possibly other times. Sometimes it gets me in trouble.

[Breaking Dawn]

It's real. Not just sound; physical things, pain, muscle movements & spasms, etc. Maybe read about Conversion Disorder on the internet, like via MayoClinic articles? Also Somatic Symptom Disorder?

[lemonSys]

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

When I'm alone for some reason I age slide, usually into little Paul who's about 7 yo, sometimes teen Paul. That seems weird to me.

I have a 7yo also: jaycee. It’s weird to me, too.

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

My others are harmful

Yep. *raises hand* I have two that I know of that are harmful. It’s scary.

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

Please don't despair, stahrgeyzer.

DITTO THIS

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

I'm interested in learning about parts who are harmful. People don't seem to talk much about that but it's very real for some people. Although I don't want to even say it, I'm afraid I have something inside of me that's very damaged and angry. It's scary to think it might be real. Maybe yours lash out through voices. Mine lashes out by taking control of the body at night during sleep, possibly other times. Sometimes it gets me in trouble.

I can relate to all of this, stahrgeyzer. All of it. If you find anything - anything - that helps with not getting in trouble, let me know, please. I need help here, too.

@stahrgeyzer and @Breaking Dawn

If interested, I found this info on conversion disorder from the Mayo Clinic site.

**gentle hugs to all y’all’s**

—lemonSys