[wrenchergirl]

Has anyone integrated at all? Are there different levels of integration? Do you still hear the others?

I've dealt with a couple of my parts and one of them appears to be "integrated". My system works and communicates well together at this point. At least we work well enough that I can function a lot better. I can concentrate at work, therefore allowing me to keep a full time job. I've found a very understanding partner and the system works well enough that I can maintain a girlfriend/life-partner relationship. Although with issues that we've been able to deal with. So, I'm not sure if I actually am "integrated" or if there are levels and I'm kind of integrated or the system is just working well enough together that I can do these things. Is there anyone else out there thats "integrated" or "integrated" to any extent? Thanks all.

[wanttoheal]

Hi wrenchergirl,
Welcome to PsychCentral!

I do think that there are levels of integration and the process depends on a myriad of things.

How awesome that you have communication now. My T and I are working toward that. It took a few years for me to even trust my T enough to be able to stay present in her office. For me, it seems as if it's a slow process. However, I just recently have noticed that I am making progress so that's cool!

I wish I had answers to all of your questions, but I don't actually have communication right now. That said though, I have gotten knowledge of a few memories and I do wonder if, when that happens, if that isn't part of the integration process. It's hard for me to tell because I still lose a lot of time and it doesn't seem as if the noise in my head is lessened any by getting that information.

Sometimes I wonder if fragments of parts disappear as I get the little memory stuff, but I don't know for sure.

I'm sorry that none of that really answers your questions, but I do want you to know that I read your post and I hope you find the answers you are searching for. Please keep posting!

[bipolar_bear]

I just wanted you to know I read your post. It sounds like you have a system that is working for you. Are you wanting to integrate? That is a very individual decision.

BB

[wrenchergirl]

wanttoheal, way to go!! Congrats on your progress. I know from experience that progress can be so painfully slow.

What you described is what I went through many years ago when I started my healing. It sounds like you are definitely on your way. I guess like most other things, integrating and progress depend on the individual. But for me, getting the knowledge of the memories was the beginning. In my experience I didn't lose any fragment of the parts, but the memories were a starting point for communicating. My T showed me healthy ways to communicate with each part and what to do when the memories came and that is what actually started the communication within the system. And from what I understand that is the beginning of integration. The noise in my head didn't lessen until much later (years) after I started getting the communication. These days the noise comes and goes and is at differing levels at different times.

I think I'm starting to realize I've only really dealt with a couple parts, and only 1 completely. Another one just recently, the past couple of weeks, came forward. Its been WAY easier this time.

Thank you for your reply bipolar_bear. What you posted made me realize that if its working well and its healthy, it doesn't matter if its called/labeled/diagnosed as integrated or not actually. Maybe I'm just hung up on being able to say whether I'm integrated or not.

[wanttoheal]

Hi wrenchergirl Thanks for the additional information.

How are things going for you?

[Kiya]

i am co-conscious most the time, but not integrated. I don't have control over the comings and goings of ages. my t said she is working for one whole person but i don't know that that is going to work for me.

[wanttoheal]

It's hard to know what's best sometimes. In the beginning, my T talked about me becoming completely healed and integrated but as time has gone on, we've been realizing that the possibility of complete healing may not happen. But, we are still working toward that goal and accepting whatever the outcome will be. At any rate, it will be better than when I started and I'm thankful for that.

[wrenchergirl]

Thats pretty much how I approached it in the beginning too. I actually had another part combine over the past month or so. Well, begin to anyway. I forgot about that... just seeing how things go. I'm feeling better. Its been a while since I've gone through flashbacks, etc. and I just couldn't think well enough to remember what to do. I'm feeling a lot better now. I'm actually getting better at dealing with it... so thats cool.

Yeah, I'm grateful to be better period too. I feel lucky to have the option to take it as it comes *s*.