[Ozark Loves]

I am expericing problems with my oldest daughter. She can't stop blaming me for my disorder and now she has said she is done with me and wont let me see my grandbabies. She says if I contact her again she will get a restraining order geeesh I love my grandsons so much. She tried to get me 96 her and her friends but I refused to in the past I would go but I am starting to understand my illness and I am sick of being crazy for her...Any suggestions. I sent her the information on this site.

[wanttoheal]

I am so sorry (((((((((((((((((((Ozark Loves)))))))))))))))). It's so hard when our illness affects the people we love so much, especially our children. As I look back, I can see so many times when my children suffered due to my illness. While it wasn't my fault that I had it, it doesn't negate the fact that they sometimes didn't get what they needed.

Are you in therapy or do you have support? I hope your daughter will realize how much you care for her and your grandchildren. One thing my T said was that I was not like "them" and that's one reason I have DID and the DID saved me so that I was not like "them."

I guess at this point, maybe the best thing to do is honor her request. If she can work through things and realize how much you care for her and the children, I hope she will allow you to see them. Perhaps she would be open to supervised visits at the very least?

We're glad you're here and hope you can get some good support.

[Jewels]

((((((((((Ozark Loves))))))))))

i'm so sorry that your daughter can't get past your DID and see you as an incredibly gifted person who survived such traumatic issues just to keep you safe and living. sometimes it seems that grown children have a more difficult time accepting things because they don't want to see the pain you had, because that would mean they would have to accept the trauma and resolve it in their own mind. you aren't being "crazy" for her, and you aren't crazy at all. what happened to you and the insuing alters made it possible for you to take care of her when you didn't even know or understand what was happening. and like wanttoheal says, maybe you need to at this point honor her request. perhaps in so doing, she will understand a bit more clearly the pain she is causing you and your grandsons in keeping you apart.

talking through this with your therapist will help you deal with the pain, and could give some insight as to why your daughter is grieving so much that she is "done" with you. i hope that your day will be gentler on you so you can heal and rest some in knowing you are a valuable being capable of a whole lot more than she can see right now.

abbi, crys and beth