[sunnye]

I was wondering if anyone else struggles with self-absorption. I became self-absorbed during my childhood; it was a way to hide from reality. I lived in fantasy all the time. But now it's like a demon inside me I can't get rid of. It's especially bad now because I'm a mom. I love my son more than anything without doubt, but the love I feel for him isn't strong enough to break this terrible "curse."

[Sannah]

Can you work on focusing on your environment more do you think?

[Safron]

I became quite self-centred (is that the same thing?) while trying to discover what was wrong with me and how to deal with it. Then a T pointed out to me that I was not self-centred, I was in fact working to be Self-Centred, to find my Self and Centre it, ground it in understanding myself better.

I understand your concerns about your son. I had three of the little ankle bitters running around. While working to find my centre and ground myself, I used the kids as a focus point. No matter how bad I felt, it was my job to take care of those kids. No matter how far off my mind wondered, an eye and an ear was always on the kids.

In a way it felt like making a pact with myself, my whole-self, that no matter what, those kids were to be properly taken care of.