[beadlady29-old]

we is asking ye all for help........
we hurteds.............
just need help

bead

[pegasus]

Yes, you ok? What's going on?

[beadlady29-old]

Originally Posted by pegasus

Yes, you ok? What's going on?

yes pegasus..................we hurteds so bad.......bing flooded
with memories................anger finally rising to surface that dad is gone forever and we never got the chance to tell him how much him and his buddies and relatives screwed up our life
haveing much difficulty processing all of this
dont see T till tuesday

bead

[pegasus]

((((((( bead ))))))))

I'm sorry you are being overwhelmed with stuff right now, and what other people did to you. I'll put a blanket round your shoulders, you are safe now.

[silentandscared]

((((((((((((((((((((((((Bead))))))))))))))))))))))))

here hunny

sorry all this is surfacing for you and all the wrongs that have happened to you......................... l am with you hunny sitting there with you holding you tight but safe
in my thoughts and prayers............pm me hunny

Mandyxx

[Sannah]

Mary, I am sorry that you are in distress. It is probably good that your feelings are surfacing so that you can deal with them.

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((bead)))))))))))))))))))))) Know I am here sitting with you. I know how scary it can be when it all comes rushing back. Let me hold your hand and we can share your pain.

BB

[beadlady29-old]

thanks so much for the support ye all............this tunnel is so dark bead is so scared here needs all the suport her can get as we walk this nasty journey.......dont think it will ever get "easy" that is just some word for some other time that is not here no more.
bead

[Sannah]

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((bead)))))))))))))))))))))) I'll be here when you need someone to be by your side. You are not alone.

BB

[multipixie9]

bead, sorry it is so very hard. can you call T monday if you need her help?? if it gets too bad call her even if appt. is not until tuesday. hang on until tomorrow. you will get through this.

You actually already survived this once, you can survive doing the memory work and counseling work that will set you free.

Be brave, you can and are brave already. i am sending you hugs to help you get through this. i do care,

leslie

[Zorah]

Originally Posted by beadlady29

thanks so much for the support ye all............this tunnel is so dark bead is so scared here needs all the suport her can get as we walk this nasty journey.......dont think it will ever get "easy" that is just some word for some other time that is not here no more.
bead

((((((((((bead))))))))))

You ...can... you...will...and... you'll see....

always here for you beadlady, anytime

[beadlady29-old]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((BB))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

so glad that you are with bead this day..............we imagines that you are walking with us today..........is okay bead is NOT hard to keep up with.......
and we is so thankful for your freindship and support and kindness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we has writed a bit.that only made the past more real.not less as we thunked is supposed to........is good to know bead not so all alone cuz her is tired of being alone sometime

bead

[Sannah]

Bead, if writing gets to be too much then take a break from it for a bit????

[silentandscared]

[1oxbowgirl]

Many hugs send your way ((((((Bead)))))). I am glad you come here where the support is wonderful, the new friends are many, and a place where you don't have to be afraid to say how scared you are. If I can help in any way let me know. 1Girl

[nightbird]

(((((dear Bead))))))

I'm so sorry you are going through this difficult time.

You are such a wonderful spirit, and such a delightful person, with a sweet heart and disposition, I can't stand that you are suffering!

Hope you see your T in the morning...

There is a lot more help for those with ptsd now, so we don't have to take it all on, and re-live these awful experiences anymore.

Finally, we have more informed, qualified professionals who can help us, and so can complementary medicine methods, like the guided imagery you like a lot ~

There is a PTSD tape that is more intense and more helpful than anything Bella has done before, I believe, because she really informed herself about PTSD and how widespread it is, (and took quite awhile researching it.

She has a book also I would like to recommend to you also, 'Healing Heroes'. It isn't only about soldiers or first responders who have it, but most of us who have suffered at the hands of others, even to the diagnosis of a cancer or any life-threatening illness, or event.

So, why am I mentioning it to you now?

Because I think it's a good tool to have around the house for times when things just come up, like now, so that you can gain some peace and calm until you see your 'T'.

Maybe if you prefer another PhD's tapes, or an MD's, that's great too. There are many good ones out there.

Here's a site, www.healingjourneys.com that can help you get them, or maybe a library near you.

Well, it's just one other tool, as I said, to have in your 'basket of healing aides and ideas' ... along with the self-soothing things we can do, even seeing tv can distract us enough, to reading something to escape into, or listening to music that will not relate to our past or any negative stuff whatsoever.

Hugs and positive thoughts your way, Dear Bead....

You are a very strong person, and I know you will make it through this time till you see your therapist, and when you do go, maybe you can have some back-up plans drawn up so that you are not alone too long should this happen again, if in fact, it ever will happen like this again, you know?

Hope you fell better soon, Bead, as I also can't stand the thought of you stressed out either!

So, please get some rest, spoil yourself somehow, and try a relaxation tape to bring you to a peaceful state for the time being ~

Peace and Love,
night

xoxoxo

[beadlady29-old]

((((leslieandthemultiepixies,bipolarbear, zorah, sannah, silentandscared, 1Girl,nightbird))))

thank you so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!it IS wonderful to have somewhere where you know that youare cared for and loved. your support is unending and your words so thoughtful and helpful!
BipolarBear the blanket feels so warm around our shoulders....ThankYous!!!
Nightbird thanks for the book and cd recommendations. we will tryh to find when we actually have money to spend. ( ha what is THAT)
have checked the library.........no such luck!
bead returns all of the hugs and blessings............we are so appreciative!

hugs,

bead

[Ozark Loves]

Feeling your pain...I have lost three love ones this year hurts like hell...was suggested to me to start writing them letters then take a pan or skillet and set the letters on fire and send them to heaven as you pray for them and yourself...I dont know why but it helps

[beadlady29-old]

thanks ye all again so much!

bead is try so hard rite now just to put one foot in front of the other and keep going...........we keep looking for the light at the end of the tunnel..we cant see it but we also cannot will not ever give up.............dunno if this therapy thing is rite path or not........prolly is because healing would beat the heck outta this....just so hard never expected this when pdoc tell us we have to see a T like ummm 4 or 5 years ago dont remember........her is not a quitter and we will not quit this either in case it really would work.........just did the yearly care plan review thing again and we actually telled T that no, nothing seems to be any gooder prolly really even worse cause now the nightmares and stuff has started again. anyway, we ask ye all to please keep hold bead handthru this and not let go............and tell you that yes we are tryign our very hardest to do what everyone is expecting of us.........sending warm fuzzies and peaceful thoughts to ye all
bead

[multipixie9]

hi bead,

you're not alone i'm out there with you. i got sick to my stomach after dinner and i don't feel so well and i'm still up wishing i was asleep.

i can't remember where i read/learned this, but when the nightmares begin to happen it means your mind is trying to deal with the past, the problems and the pain. it doesn't come up until your mind is more ready to cope. so that is one good thing about the crummy bad dreams.

i'm not a hand holder cos i don't like being touched very much, but i can sit with you and i can care that things are tough.

bead, it IS going to get better. try to get some sleep tonight and just know that you are not really alone. hugs,

leslie and her pixies

ps i changed my mind, i can hold bead's hand if you need/want that. and i'm sending you some warm fuzzies and concern too.

[beadlady29-old]

leslie and her multipixies....................

thanks so much for help bead so much...........
if our mind is ready for this y are we soooooooooooooooo
scccccccccaaaaaaaaarrrrrrreeeeeddddd?????????!!!!!!!!!!

this fear is like a monster that will not let go of us.........
do that make any sense?

we sits next to you........and if it does not feel safe to hold
bead hand then we does not ask her to..........just knowing
that you sits with us and you cares is definitely enuf!!!!!!!!!



hope that you are feeling gooder, much gooder this a.m.!
sorry that u had a bad nite too. we send u some warm chammonille
tea with a touch of honey if you can drink it and hope it
helps
also sends you peaceful thoughts and more warm fuzzies,

bead

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bead))))))))))))))))))))Can I sit with you and hold your hand. We can be so all calm together and just sit and be safe. Know I am here next to you.

BB

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((((( bead ))))))))))))))))))

[Sannah]