Unable to understand my mental state

Hi,

I am separated for the past 8-9 months. My daughter was just 3 months then and although I made multiple attempts, things haven't worked out. He has cut all forms of communication with me although he did make a sort-of formal visit on my daughter's first birthday but other than that he has not made contact to check for her also. I am over him I know that for sure. However, I am not sure about how I feel. No matter what I do I still feel no tension. I am not able to feel the responsibility of my child. Since I live in a joint family (parents, brother and his wife) and they help with my child as well as regular expenses (basic needs). I pay for any extra expense but then now I don't even feel bad or ashamed about it, neither do I feel the need to work harder to be able to share the basic expenses.

I am working freelance. However, I am unable to concentrate or focus on anything. I do ten things and end up with nothing concrete eventually making little progress. I am unable to pour passion into anything. I guess deep down I feel that doing anything is futile.

I live in a dream world. Its like creating my own films where I play the main lead and I get to direct too. I have complete control over it. This has increased so much so that I am unable to do anything now. I even spend less time with my child. I understand why this is happening but I dont know how to control it or stop it completely.

I know there is some problem with me but I dont know what it is. I don't feel stressed out or frustrated, tensed or anything but then I am not able to get anything done either.

Help me!

Have you been to your doctor and told them how you feel? I think that you should see a professional to help with your feelings.
Try doing the 'sanity score test' on this website - it may give you a little insight into your mental health

I agree with Belle1979.

You should get some assistance from a T, to gain some understanding of who you are & what you can do to become a happier person. The sanity score does pick up on tendencies people have, which you can research further and mention to the T.

Best wishes!