After six years of a dreamy relationship...

I got dumped.

I feel depressed for a long time, but I never realized I was ill. From 2007 on I started noticing that I lost interest in my life per se, and everything I did was to impress her, or trying to show her that I was capable of doing something with my life. Now I feel like I lost everything I had in my life. She was the one that made me feel strong enough to accomplish new things in life. She left me and I'm on my 4th day without eating, just drinking water. Crying all day long, and could sleep just after taking some medicine (I've been to a psychiatrist yesterday afternoon). I even tried to kill myself in a moment of desperation.

About the relation, I met her when I was 22 and she was 17. We were very young. We dated for 6 years, in 3 different countries: Brazil, Italy (where we lived together for 3 years) and now Austria, which is her country. I feel homesick, I do not have the power to finish things at the university, I completely lost interest in my career, I do not speak the language of the country, I have just one person that I could consider as a friend, I miss my family and friends back home, and I cannot accept that she did not care about me and could break up the way she did, in the situation I was...

First time she came to talk about breaking up was last june, then I asked for a second chance, I told that I felt depressed and I could not deal with that situation at the moment. We traveled together during summer and, at least for me, it was great. But she had that urge to break up, even not knowing why, and not knowing if she was sure about it.

Last october we made six years together, but one week before that she told me she was still unhappy with having a relation and that she needed to be alone. I tried to realize why, and suggested that we could see each other less than the usual in order to maybe develop a sense of missing. I was hoping that maybe she could miss me and notice that I am important for her.

Then we were dating since then, but not as before. It was the last chance, and the relation was very fragile. During New Year's Eve she got drunk and dumped me at seven o'clock at the morning, after disappearing of the party. It was a very traumatic situation for me, because I did not expect that. I did not see it coming. Until now I talked to her everyday since the breakup, even knowing it's wrong. Yesterday, after coming back from the doctor, I called her to tell her everything I think about the situation, and it relieved me. After that I deleted her from my phone contacts and all other internet stuff. But still, I caught myself from time to time trying to know about her, about how she feels, and even trying to deny, I still hope she regrets.

I don't understand, and I don't believe her when she tells me her reasons. I think that she does not want a relation with me, and she wants to be alone just until the moment she falls in love again. That hurts me a lot. I've never been so jealous, and I cannot help but to think about her and all the good moments she gave me.

I'm at her country, her city, with her friends and family. I don't have friends here, and the only person that cared about me was one friend in common we have (that I met through her), the one that got me to a doctor. Afterwards, I had contact with someone of her family, which is a psychiatrist and talked to me a lot, trying to help me to get over this situation. I do not know what to do, and I'm afraid of staying alone at my apartment, because sometimes I feel horrible and I know I can try stupid things. Now I'm taking some medicine to calm me down, but I'm still afraid. I do not know how to deal it that alone. I miss her, she was the only friend I had. Sorry for writing that much, and sorry if it is very confusing...

Hi ~ Bless your heart, I know it's difficult, but you CAN survive without her. We have ALL had heart-breaking break-ups that devastated us, but we HAD to survive. You will too. I'm not trying to minimize what you're going thru - please don't think that. I know how painful it is. But I just want you to know that you WILL heal - it just will take some time.

Since she was unhappy, you certainly wouldn't want her to stay with you, feeling the way that she did. That wouldn't be any kind of relationship. You don't say what her issues were, but obviously this breakup was for the best - you don't see it now, but hopefully later on you will.

I'm very glad you're seeing a psychiatrist - that was a good move on your part. He will be very helpful in your healing process. I know things are all mixed up right now, but soon everything will make sense again and you'll be back "out there" living your life. I'm sorry you're in such pain - but know that you can come here and vent whenever you like. God bless and please take care of yourself. Hugs, Lee

It might be good for you to relocate to where you have your own friends and/or family you can be around. It could be very important to you to have that support as you move on with your life.

Best wishes to you. The pain does ease with time.

I miss my ex too alot. He was not treating me right. I remember the good times when we 1st met. I feel u, Sometimes the heart never heals