[Livebythesea]

Will he get half if we divorce? Some background...when I met my husband I lived in New York City and got lucky and bought a cheap apartment. We got married and after encouraging him to go back to school for architecture he got his 4 year college degree. We decided to move to the suburbs since we wanted to raise kids out there and he could make more money out there. I added him to the deed to avoid taxes since I made over $500,000 when I sold my apartment. My husband never had any money.

So we buy a piece of land for 440,000 and I had to put his name on the deed so we could get a 400,000 mortgage to build a house. The market collapses, and so do I (first depression and hospitalization) and I learn I have fertility problems so no kids...then I go manic and leave my hysband for another man for 3 months then realize what a bad mistake I made and we get back together...and pretty much life has been horrible for the past four years. We're on the brink of divorce and he wants $80,000 because he's not going to leave with nothing (he wants 80,000 for a down payment on a house here) when I know all of the equity that is in the house, about $400,000, I feel is mine and nothing to do with him. He doesn't have his architecture license yet but I told him I don't want any money from him, or alimony but to leave the house alone...but he said to give him $80,000 or he'll see me in court because he can get half. I don't know how people deal with this! Would he really get half?

[Leed]

I don't know what the laws are in New York. They're different state by state. You'd better have a good lawyer to help you with the divorce. When I got divorced here in Michigan, my husband gave me the house, free & clear as it was paid for. I COULD have gotten 1/2 of his pension too, but I decided not to as I just wanted OUT of the marriage, and I wanted nothing from him. I wanted to strings of any kind attached to him. So we split free & clear. We'd been married 26 years.

So make sure you have a GOOD divorce lawyer -- preferably a woman because a man will generally lean more towards the man even tho he's YOUR lawyer. So try to get a female who's very "determined." And you might look up online about the laws in your state so you know ahead of time what to expect.

I wish you the very best. You should get it all since he had nothing and didn't contribute anything. Best of luck and let us know what happened, ok? God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee

Don't couples normally split 50/50 even if one of them wasn't working or making a financial contribution? I see this all the time in the news when celebrities get divorced and they have to give a sizeable amount of their empire to their spouse. Tiger Woods in particular comes to mind.

[Stranger516]

Since New York is an "equitable distribution" state, if both of your names were on the deed to the house than you best bet he will get half... sorry

[Livebythesea]

Thank you for the responses.