[autolover70]

I am a 42 year old divorced father of 4.Recently diagnosed with a Type II diabetes.I met my gf through a local persoanals ad.We went out and within a couple of months had moved intogether.The first couple of three years we had an awesome relationship,we got along well,had a awesome bedroom life.But then her Grandmother that raised her became sick and died.She pushed me away while dealing with her grandmother's sickness and even death.I thought I had become unappealing to her or done something so I went outside of the relationship and found a female penpal to write to and talk to about things.Our letters became more and more intimate.I was asked to be a pallbearer at her grandmother's funeral.After the funeral my GF found a letter written by me to the penpal and a fight ensued.Our relationship has been tumultous and the bedroom life hasn't been the same since(almost nonexistant).In fact it's been as long as 2-3 years before we " slept" together .This lack of sexual intmacy has weighed heavily and caused many aggrivated fights between us.I have a terrible temper and always managed to control it till after the penpal thing.My sexual frustration and lack of any intimacy had caused it to boil over.I began to have anger fits and I have broken my laptop computer and my cell phone because of the lack of control,not to mention the hurtful cruel things that have been said in the heat of the arguement.Well In September we had a fight and I had had enough,I couldn't handle anymore and tried to OD on xanax.I spent 24 hours in the local ER as well as being sent to a Behavioural Center.I have since been back to spend 2 weeks there at the end of November to Middle of December 2011 of our relationship or lack there of. I am having to deal with the fact I get no support from my family(I was emotionally,and physically abused as a child)The only support I get is from my current GF and she says that she's had enough.It's not fair that all this get's dumped in her lap by my family.My family has never really liked her or accepted her.Now she wants me to move out so she can"find herself".THe stress and emotional dependency is more than she can handle being she has 2 kids(teenagers) that she has to deal with.My kids haven't been back to see me since back in September because of the "fights" that my GF and I had.I now have to find a place of my own and try to deal with this on my own.I see a psychiatrist, and a psychologist regularly.I am realy at a loss here because I really care about this woman greatly and have given my heart to her.We were engaged but after my last bout in the hospital the quit wearing the ring.She said she quit wearing as a insintive to get me to do better and behave(temper issue). I really don't have much will to live without her.She's my everything and I know that I am to blame for this.I feel so guilty.I can't even look at her in the eyes without getting emotional.This is killing me.Please Help me?????

[Leed]

I'm sorry this is happening. It sounds like you REALLY care for her.

How about getting some anger management? Perhaps if she saw you making an effort to improve the anger issue, she'd be more willing to work things out. Anger is dangerous, especially when it gets out of control. It's very frightening too -- my ex had a HORRIBLE temper!

I know you're already seeing mental health specialists, but they don't "specialize" in anger problems. See an anger mgt. specialist and hopefully things will improve. Best of luck & God bless. Hugs, Lee

[RonPSH]

Here's some things I wrote about Anger Management awhile back....hope it helps!

http://www.profound-self-help.com/se...anagement.html

http://www.profound-self-help.com/an...self-help.html

[sqweaky64]

I have emotional contro0l issues also.emotions were repressed,then explosive outbursts occur when they build up.Poor self esteem causes me to feel on the defensive frequently.I find that not attempting to control others and deciding what will or won't work in my relationships help.I know it's difficult but it can be done.I t feels unbearable breaking up and this will pass intime and then you can work on the control issues,but have to go your grieving process first