Update on my divorce...

Hi, folks...
My divorce will be final on Thursday. It seems so surreal.

I've now been living with my best friend and her wife longer than I was living with my ex in our new condo. I never really had time to adjust to the condo my ex and I were living in and the result is that I feel I haven't had a true place of my own for a year and a half.

That will end on Monday, the eleventh. I just bought a small condo nearby and it is being painted right now...and new flooring will be installed later this week. I have to work the weekend (oh yeah, new job, too!) but have Monday off to try and get sorted.

My ex and I have been mostly cordial through this process, although she's gone feral a few times and been really controlling and disrespectful where my attorney is concerned. This is supposed to be a collaborative divorce, but my atty. says it's collaborative in name only, and I'm inclined to agree with her.

We've accepted an offer on our cabin. My heart is breaking for all that I've lost, but I know that once this is over, I can begin my new "normal".

To make things more complicated and unpleasant, my mom's health began to deteriorate once I had to go back to work full time, and she needs to go into a place with assistance. I feel that I've failed her in a way. I knew that I was the only entity keeping her in her home. At least she can socialize with tons of other peeps and take herself walking in her building...I used to take her walking at the mall to help keep her healthy (end stage COPD).

On the up side, I stopped by my new place after work, and the colors I chose are awesome! Vibrant reds, calming blue greys, cool pale greens...they all really flow well together. Once the flooring is in, it will look like a brand new place. It took me two days to clean all the boogers, dust, grease, etc. off of all the surfaces. Don't ask.

I'm filled with trepidation for my first night in my new place. My besties have been a real buffer for me. I have not lived alone for over sixteen years. I will have to adjust to new smells, sounds, place...I know that it will work out okay, though.

I still get teary about the divorce. In a way, I can't believe that my ex doesn't love me any longer, but clearly that's the case. I really believed we'd be together forever. I can't imagine ever dating again, although I won't say never. I sure as hell know I won't ever marry again! The legal disentangling from another has been a hell that I never want to repeat.

I know I haven't been the most prolific poster, but thanks for listening.

Hello Fennel61: The Skeezyks would like to offer his best wishes for great success in your new home & with your new life!

"my new place": I like the sound of that! It sounds like freedom....

Thank you, Skeezyks and MrMoose...I am happy to report that it IS like freedom!

Starting over in a new place definitely gives a new start on life

Beginnings are scary, endings are sad, and its what in the middle that counts the most. Make the most of your new beginning and see it for everything that it can be. Mostly, take care of you.