[sirniles333]

My wife(who was also my best friend) had an affair with a woman she works with(she's bisexual). I found out about the affair a month ago. We decided to work on our marriage, but her heart never seemed into it. Last night she told me it was over and that she was moving on with this woman.

I'm crushed. I've lost my wife, my stepson, my home, everything. I don't know how to go on.

[CANDC]

Hi @sirniles333 -welcome to MSF My Support Forums. I am sorry you have so many losses at once. It must be kind of a shock.

It is not easy to recover from loss. Some people find a grief counselor helpful or a therapist or a support group. What I find difficult is reinventing who I think I am, how I define my self concept. It is not easy but it can be done.

Glad you joined this community. Hope it helps you find the support you are looking for.

[Tjpg]

Originally Posted by sirniles333

My wife(who was also my best friend) had an affair with a woman she works with(she's bisexual). I found out about the affair a month ago. We decided to work on our marriage, but her heart never seemed into it. Last night she told me it was over and that she was moving on with this woman.

I'm crushed. I've lost my wife, my stepson, my home, everything. I don't know how to go on.

Hey welcome to the forums,

First off, I'm so sorry to read what you're going through. I am going through a separation myself but just wanted to tell you that you are not alone here and you are going to get though this even though it doesnt feel like it, especially right now. Do you have family/friends support to help you get through right now?

Tessa

[Breaking Dawn]

I also want to welcome you to MSF, sirniles333, & I'm glad you found these forums. I'm very sorry that you have to endure these terrible losses. I wish you all the best!

[workinonit32]

sirniles333,

I know the pain you feel. The emotional rollercoaster. Anger, sadness, desperation, looking back, looking hopelessly forward. All I can say having gone through one divorce and now on my second. Lean on any support you have. Read what others go through and how they cope. Try to distract yourself and find something that occupies your mind. For me I know working out changes my chemical balance. I try to think rationally, knowing, I got throught this once, others are in the same situation, I will get through this again. I lost my best friend but I guess if I was not hers then someday I can find someone that feels the way about me that I did about her. Key here is not to dwell on the past or the future just look at the little daily tasks as a win and they will turn into daily wins, weekly wins, monthly wins and at yearly wins. Hang in there.

[sirniles333]

Originally Posted by workinonit32

sirniles333,

I know the pain you feel. The emotional rollercoaster. Anger, sadness, desperation, looking back, looking hopelessly forward. All I can say having gone through one divorce and now on my second. Lean on any support you have. Read what others go through and how they cope. Try to distract yourself and find something that occupies your mind. For me I know working out changes my chemical balance. I try to think rationally, knowing, I got throught this once, others are in the same situation, I will get through this again. I lost my best friend but I guess if I was not hers then someday I can find someone that feels the way about me that I did about her. Key here is not to dwell on the past or the future just look at the little daily tasks as a win and they will turn into daily wins, weekly wins, monthly wins and at yearly wins. Hang in there.

Thank you so much. I think once I'm out of the house things will better. Right now it's hard because we still live together. And she has basically moved her co-worker into the house. So I basically have to constantly have them in my face.

Luckily I should be out by next weekend.

Thank you again

[CONFUSED314159]

I had a similar situation, except the affair was with a man and my wife never agreed to work on things because she said her heart wasn't in it. In my situation I don't think she is moving on to this new relationship as that had some issues also, so I don't understand why she won't at least give me a chance if she isn't moving on.