Not doing so good

I was doing fairly well with the anti psychotics making me gain a fair bit. I was even almost accepting it. The last two weeks tho I've been watching the weight melt off and watching my attitude reverse back to my anorexic thoughts. I don't know how to do it. I'll be starting therapy soon I think, wait list. But the closer it comes the more I feel the need to lose. Self defeating I don't know. Just wanted to share. I am pretty confused. Someday I cannot remember why I am going to be getting therapy in the first place.

For starters, you are depending on anti psychotics to gain weight & not your own eating habits? Therapy will help you get to the healthy weight & stay there without the need for the meds to get you there & then the bad thing about meds is that they can take you beyond your healthy weight. When you depend on yourself, you can get to that healthy weight & use your CONTROL to keep yourself there rather then using the CONTROL to loose.

Therapy really does help & they give you good points on how to stay healthy & also a place to be accountable.

I was depending on the antipsychotics to get my psychosis under control. I meant I was doing good at accepting the weight gain that came with it. I am just trying to do my best till I get to therapy, its been a long wait. Sorry if I wasn't very clear. I was disappointed at my failure after doing well with acceptance.