[sinking]

Hi,

i feel like im sinking and dont know what to do to save myself.

i recently realized that during the past years i have slowly and unconsciously replaced self harm with food and now im addicted to it just like i was addicted to self harm.
i keep thinking about food all day, every day and i feel so bad and disgusting for always giving in and eating all what comes to my mind. it gives me relief for a little while but then i go back thinking about what i'll eat next and the relief it will give me and it all starts back againg.
then some days i skip meals and walk for many hours trying to consume all the calories but then i have to binge again. what do i do?

eat or self harm? i feel like i have no other options.

im seeing a therapist but he doesnt know about this, because up until now i thought i could control it and beat it by myself but now i realize i cant and this IS a problem to me and i want to overcome it but dont know how.

any suggestion?
please help me.
thank you

[LucyG]

Are you skipping a lot of meals? Are you depriving yourself? If so, the reason you want to binge is because your body thinks it's in a famine, and is sending you messages to eat so you don't starve to death.

When I was 15, I had anorexia, came out of it, gained some weight so then I started starving during the daytime and binging at night. The reason I was driven to binge was because I had eaten so little, my body was sending me food signals in dreams to eat, eat and eat some more.

You have to eat enough that your body knows it's not going to starve if you want to move beyond binging.

A good book on learning to listen to your body's eating signals is Intuitive Eating. Here's a link to it on Amazon.com. Read the reviews to get an idea how it has helped others:

http://www.amazon.com/Intuitive-Eati...tuitive+eating

[sinking]

Thank you LucyG.

im not skipping a lot of meals, so i dont think thats the reason i binge, but thank you for the precious information, i'll keep it in mind.