[JJORANGE]

I initially started seeing my Therapist for problems with Binge eating. Particularly one night after school when I ordered a large pizza, cheese bread and 10 wings and ate it all myself, even though it was all Horrible. Anyway, after a few months in Therapy I've discovered some other problems, seems like after every session I just get to add things to my list. And now i hardly ever eat. Usually when I wake up I have 1-2 cups of coffee, which makes me not want to eat, and takes away the hunger pains so I don't even think about it, then get another cup when I get to school to keep the hunger at bay during class. One I get home, usually around 3-4, I finally sit down and eat something. Not very big but just enough to tide me over. Then Dinner comes and i'll eat a big meal. I know what i'm doing is not good but somehow I just keep doing it. I dont even feel the hunger anymore until around 3 pm. Today was the first time I told my T whats been going on and he seemed pretty concerned. Asked me to play a more conscious role in making sure I get enough food, at least for the next week until we could talk about it more.

But I know myself and I really feel like I won't do it. Nothing interests me when it comes to food anymore. Often when I do eat I feel nauseous after so I have to stop. Does anyone have any experience or advice?

[lowinmood]

I've been doing this for year's and it's only now reading this that I have realised why I drink so much coffee, I thought it was because of the taste, but I'm subconsciously using it to suppress my appetite, slightly worrying really, at least you've become aware of it, I've been doing this for the last 20 years and only just this minute have become aware of what I'm doing!

[LaDauphine]

Hello!
I get like this as well.
I'm either insatiable or can't even be bothered to eat food.
I'm also a coffee junkie so I understand what you're going through.
I've been trying to force down fruit and vegetables - even in a shake or smoothie - whenever I get into this phase because I know if I don't eat I'll have a binge session!
Fruits are my safe food. They go down easy and never ups et my stomach.

Do you have a routine in which you wake up at the same time everyday?

[JJORANGE]

Originally Posted by LaDauphine

Hello!
I get like this as well.
I'm either insatiable or can't even be bothered to eat food.
I'm also a coffee junkie so I understand what you're going through.
I've been trying to force down fruit and vegetables - even in a shake or smoothie - whenever I get into this phase because I know if I don't eat I'll have a binge session!
Fruits are my safe food. They go down easy and never ups et my stomach.

Do you have a routine in which you wake up at the same time everyday?

No I wake up very sporaticly. Same with going to sleep. One night it will be 10 pm waking at 8 or 9. The next I'll go to sleep at 3 am and wake up at 7.

My job make it difficult as well to create a routine as I work 3-12 am shifts 2-3 days a week.

[LaDauphine]

Originally Posted by JJORANGE

No I wake up very sporaticly. Same with going to sleep. One night it will be 10 pm waking at 8 or 9. The next I'll go to sleep at 3 am and wake up at 7.

My job make it difficult as well to create a routine as I work 3-12 am shifts 2-3 days a week.

Rotating shifts make maintaining a healthy routine very difficult! It's one of the reasons I REFUSED to work anything other than Monday-Friday, 8-4. I am too obsessed with planning meals and workouts that I'd tweak out if I had to change it up with a work schedule!

You should try to get a few different "regular" routines - for each of your shifts. I think it'll help!

[waggiedog]

Well, I really don't think for one minute my eating disorder(s) will ever change now, 32 years is a very long time to spend you're whole waking hours thinking ''food food food'', either how to avoid it or how to get enough of it. Baring in mind that my entire family were very food orintated, I already had a predisposition to fall into ED's. I've had every known ED and a few I've made up myself ~ none have ever really made me happy. YES, I was excatic when I was anorexic, lovely and thin with bones protuding everywhere, and hospitalised for it. I could always deal with the ''thin'' me, but never the ugly fat me. My weight would swing vastly from very very underweight to overweight obese (that was disgusting). And here I am today aged 56 and STILL a slave to food. OK, I don't have the massive binges I used to, but on the other hand I can't severely restrict as I once did. I feel fat as I've put on weight since my Dad passed away in May. All my time then was spent nursing him and a solid round of hospital stays and Dr's/consultants. The ironic thing was is that then I was underweight, yet people kept saying how good I looked!!!! That would only encourage me to continue to stay at the weight of a child. It's winter now, so I can cover the body I hate, but I have to go to dangerous extreme lengths to stay at this weight which i think is too much. I used to make myself sooooooooooooooooo ill from overeating, was OK when I discovered bulimia. My depression always remains, that goes with the Borderline Personality Disorder. I feel everyday I'm putting on a show for the world, the me pretending to be ''normal'' and the other me behind closed doors. Take care everyone. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX