[sinking]

I've been having struggles with food for years and now getting worse after i talked about it wity my T for the first time 3weeks ago. before it, it was a secret.

during the last days i wrote and copied all i've written here and on my diary to show my T. i wanted some help with the thoughts that are not letting me be.

She said i dont seem to have any ED because im TOO AWARE of what i do and why.

Im too aware?????

Even when she knows i cant sleep at night, being focused at work, and i keep counting and weighting and worrying about it all the time???

and even if im already being underweight, she says my weight doesnt worry her because she believes me when i say i can stop when i want… so even if i go lower she wont care?

she said we need to work on other stuff (what??) and my weight is the last of the worries.

yeah, but it the first one for me!

i feel totally invalidated and i think she sensed it. i dont know what to do anymore. i even told her that even when i ask for help i never get it… and then i think she realized i was saying she isnt helping me at all either.

WHAT DO I DO NOW? WHO/WHAT CAN HELP???
PLEASEEEEE....

Never heard being aware as a disqualification for any addiction. Doesn't make sense to me! Think I'd say something like You may not be worried but I am. I'd ask too if what she thinks is a higher priority is at all related.....cause & effect. Hang in there & stand your ground.









QUOTE=sinking;6166894]I've been having struggles with food for years and now getting worse after i talked about it wity my T for the first time 3weeks ago. before it, it was a secret.

during the last days i wrote and copied all i've written here and on my diary to show my T. i wanted some help with the thoughts that are not letting me be.

She said i dont seem to have any ED because im TOO AWARE of what i do and why.

Im too aware?????

Even when she knows i cant sleep at night, being focused at work, and i keep counting and weighting and worrying about it all the time???

and even if im already being underweight, she says my weight doesnt worry her because she believes me when i say i can stop when i want… so even if i go lower she wont care?

she said we need to work on other stuff (what??) and my weight is the last of the worries.

yeah, but it the first one for me!

i feel totally invalidated and i think she sensed it. i dont know what to do anymore. i even told her that even when i ask for help i never get it… and then i think she realized i was saying she isnt helping me at all either.

WHAT DO I DO NOW? WHO/WHAT CAN HELP???
PLEASEEEEE....[/QUOTE]

[sinking]

She messed up with my head. Dont know what to think or do anymore

[eskielover]

I think she MIGHT be thinking that the other things that need worked on may actually help your ED. Usually every ED has underlying other issues involved that are actual triggers for the ED behaviors to increase. For me it is high stress situations....has been all my life.

Getting help wuth the major issues in my life has helped my ED become a non-problem any more.

Just a thought as to where your T's thinking MIGHT be coming from.

[yellow_fleurs]

I don't think she should have brushed it off it is a problem for you and concerns you. I think it is better to nip it in the bud so to speak, because when I developed anorexia it started with just a little preoccupation and got much worse. That being said, when recovering from anorexia, my T wanted to talk about it all the time, including my weight and potential reasons behind it and I found it detrimental because it was a symptom of other issues and this just resulted in my focusing on it more. I found focusing on it made it worse. Maybe this is what she is concerned about and wants to focus on what she considers underlying/pressing issues. I think it is reasonable for you to inquire about this directly and say that it concerns you and that you want to address it before it gets worse or something. She should take you seriously. I think it's great you had the courage to bring it up and not hide it. Also, I was self aware, too and didn't know how to ask for help so I kept it a secret. Being self aware is a good thing in my opinion because you know you have a problem. Take care!

[Gr3tta_0]

Some people use ED behaviors as a distraction in therapy - I do - so, maybe your T wants to stay on track with the other work you're both doing, and NOT let the ED take over.
I wish providers wouldn't let me pull this bs.
All the best to you! I hope you feel much better in all ways as soon as possible.

[sinking]

Yes,.maybe, but i want ana to be a priority!