[BamaSurvivor]

It's been probably 2 years or so since my bulimia was in active mode. I've had a couple falls here and there, but nothing out of control. I've lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time (for me) and I was finally able to wear 'normal' cloths again. It's felt so great to feel like I'm a normal size again... But yesterday I went shopping and all the pants I tried on in my size and even one size bigger were really snug on me. I *can't* gain weight back again, I just can't. I've been obsessing every since 3:30 yesterday when this happened... I didn't eat anything yesterday after that took place. I cried myself to sleep lastnight because the weight isn't falling off anymore, it seems like it's starting to come back. Today I've drank 8 bottles of water today, ate 10 wheat crackers, jogged almost 2 miles, and tried purging once but I guess I didn't have enough in me to purge, just water. I like 30 pounds being the weight I want to be and the weight I need to be. Right now, this seems to be the only way for me to lose it. *sigh*