[soccergirl11]

I always feel really awkward like we shouldn't be watching this even if it's just acting, because a birth scene throws attention onto the fact that there's things going on with someone "down south." I feel extremely uncomfortable if there are other people around when scenes like this come on tv.

I feel awkward when people talk about it in regular life too. My mom's friend had a baby and we were all talking in the kitchen and she started talking about the birth, how many times she had to push and things and that too made me feel really uncomfortable like we shouldn't be talking about this because of the area of the body it involves.

Is this normal to feel uncomfortable like this? Do other people feel this way? I find this embarrassing to even ask about because I have a feeling that it's not normal. Nobody else ever seems uncomfortable. I'm 15 and female. I have no idea if maybe this is connected to the fact that I'm terrified of having to go through this someday too. But mainly I feel uncomfortable because the whole thing is connected to what's going on with someone's um..parts..

When I was 3 or 4, our babysitter almost had a baby in front of me. When my mom got home she had to rush her to the hospital and she barely made it there in time. I fear this experience may have affected me and caused me to feel abnormally about this topic.

So is it normal?

[pegasus]

Hello soccergirl11, welcome to Psych Central.

I think you have great insight in putting your experience of when you were 3 as the possible reason for your fears. That must have been very scary for you at the time, not knowing or understanding what was going on.

I think also at the age of 15 it is normal to find talking about the lower female region as an embarrassing subject. Giving birth is a very intimate experience and though painful, there is a fantastic reward at the end of it.

If you feel the traumatic experience of the past is still haunting you, it might be worth talking to your doctor and getting some counseling for it. It's good to talk about it and it will take the fear out of it for you.

[healingme4me]

If your early childhood experience is affecting you, i agree, that counseling could help.

At the same time, I can fully appreciate how uncomfortable candid discussions could be, at 15 years old. Granted, you, at this age, may have knowledge of how everything works, anatomically. Sometimes, candid discussions can be tmi, depending on circumstances. ???

There is that saying about not growing up, too fast.

If, when it comes time for marriage or when you grow and find yourself unable to feel comfortable, then counseling is again a recommendation.

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[SnakeCharmer]

I felt exactly the same way about it when I was 15. I think most of my friends did, too. Except the ones who were eager to get pregnant. They were into it. But most of my friends, at 15, weren't interested. The very worst was if our mothers started talking about their own personal experiences, especially if they were talking about us being born.

I reached adulthood with normal psychosexual development, no hang-ups, phobias or neuroses in that area. I'm still not keen on birth scenes or hearing every detail of a woman's delivery, but giving birth is just about the most dramatic and heroic thing that happens in a woman's life. Women, like your mother's friend, talking about all the details with another woman is like two guys who've been in war together talking about battles they were in.

One of the problems these days is TV shows and movies keep going for more and more realistic depictions of everything, including sex and birth. Also violence, but I don't want to put that in the same sentence as the others. I think, actually, it's purposely meant to make people feel emotion. With you it's embarrassment, with some it's sweet sentiment, and I know a few people who've had bad experiences who can't watch at all. It's too realistic.

So, no, I don't think there's anything at all odd about a 15 year old who squirms when birth depictions get a little too real. I think you're pretty normal.

[ifst5]

Childbirth in itself is hardly pleasant - the pain is excruciating and it's not exactly dignified. So even if you were to dislike discussions on the basis of being squeamish - you could hardly be considered unusual. You're also still rather young, i don't see how you can be expected to enjoy discussions on birthing and motherhood at your age.

All that being said, i think for this topic to be so concerning you've come on the internet looking for answers, I think your earlier experiences of the topic probably have heightened your feelings. You witnessed an emergency situation that could have had a very negative outcome. It didn't throw childbirth into a more positive light for you. And as much as it's a fascinating process it isn't without potential dangers/risks - so a professional would need to work through this topic and how you feel about it in a balanced yet sensitive way.

I hope you have access to such options. All the best.

[waggiedog]

Hello dear soccergirl11. First of all I'd like to offer you a very big warm WELCOME to Psych Central. It has so much to offer you, people with the same problems/issues and information. Check out the different forums and see about following a thread which includes things you are interested in. And now ............................... the next thing, which you wrote about. Gosh yes, when I was sweet 15 I HATED it when adults talked about women being pregnant or having babies, it was exactly the same if the subject came on the TV, I'd actually leave the room and turn bright RED! In fact I STILL get really embarrassed NOW and I'm 55 years old!! I'm OK if I'm alone, although I can't stand seeing women in such horrid pain. I most feel embarrassed when I'm watching TV with my 79 years old Dad!! He doesn't like it either and he starts coughing, which he always does when something's going on he feels akward about. So in answer to your question, YES it IS perfectly normal to feel as you do hunny. HUGS. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[Perna]

I don't think there is a "normal" about what we enjoy thinking/hearing/talking about, especially those involving pain/body parts and emotions we cannot or do not wish to share in. I don't like horror shows, zombies, transformations into werewolves or vampires, etc. for the same reason and feel embarrassed others seem to enjoy such things. I don't like having my neck touched by even my husband, much less a vampire "kissing" me there and sucking my blood?

sounds normal to me.

it is just awkward and pretty private.

[Pierro]

Hello Soccergirl, Welcome to pc. That was a traumatic experience you had when you were very little. You are only 15 and I think it is quite normal to be uncomfortable. I have 3 children myself and some women go into such detail I feel like saying "too much information".

best wishes