[imnotsurewhatimdoin]

Hi everyone,

This is my first post on here...ever. I've come to this site in hopes of self improvement given a situation that is difficult to me for a reason I can't seem to fathom.

I have to admit that i'm not sure if I have a problem, but I haven't been the most active about solving this problem and recently its been on my mind more.

Background:

Im a male, 20 years old in college. I transferred schools after my freshman year. Im in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend (about two hours) since my freshman year (two years). My relationship with my parents is questionable and often results in fights or negativity about my performance in school and life overall. I suffered from a terrible drug incident (ecstasy) which landed me in the hospital after coming out of a medically induced coma. I have had a history of drug use and have risen above that since then (about 2 years now).

Current situation:

I like to think that i'm a hard worker but recently Ive lost a sense of motivation towards my school work, my passion for fitness, and other projects I would like to work on (computer science related projects). I find it very difficult to pull myself together to study and do work the same way I used to. Quite often I find myself thinking about the isolated nature of my daily life - quite often I go on without talking to people or having real true friendships. I have been somewhat active in trying to develop friends and meet people at my new school, which I have done to some extent, but not to the extent which other people have.

I know its wrong to compare, but in this case I just haven't found many people. I can only say that I have one friend who isn't the people I live with. The people I live with are a story in and of itself with the essence of it being drug fueled craziness. Im trying not to lose hope with making new friends and people who care about me, but the problem I face is that a lot of the time my efforts get me no where. Im quite honestly unsure what to do in face of this situation and to be completely honest, my long distance relationship doesn't help because the one person I want to spend my time with is not physically here or even here over text as much as I would like.

I'm slowly finding myself losing hope in light of this situation as well as I just feel empty a lot of the time. Along side that, I find myself thinking about it even though I try not to and Im lost when it comes to coping with it or dealing with it well. All ive done thus far is to just shake it off and wait until I can sleep to just start a new day.

I honestly need help with this, or whether I should seek the help from a professional.

Any help, thoughts, or ideas are welcome!

Thanks

[Thunder Bow]

Stay away from drug orientated people and parties. You do not need those kind of "friends". Emptiness will come with change as you change, only to be filled in with a stronger sense of self as you heal. You are in the process of healing still. In your case, you do not need to be surrounded by a circle of "friends". Learn about yourself as you heal, you seem to be a strong hearted warrior when it comes to your determination to heal. A counselor is a good idea while you are at school.

[Skeezyks]

Hello imnotsurewhatimdoin: Welcome to PsychCentral! From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though you're having some difficulty adjusting to a still fairly new school environment, being that you transferred. I recall reading an article in our local newspaper recently which talked about this being quite a common problem among college students. It is certainly unfortunate that you are living in a drug fueled environment. Is there no way to get away from that?

It sounds to me as though you are experiencing some situational depression... that is depression that is brought on by a particular set of circumstances... as opposed to the type of depression that is with a person all the time regardless of their circumstances. So the good news is that if you can change your circumstances, your depression will likely dissolve.

My perspective is that people become friends because they share common interests. So my thinking is that one way for a person to find friends would be to become involved in activities where like-minded persons are likely to be found such as clubs, volunteer organizations, etc. This not only creates an opportunity to meet like-minded persons, but it also provides opportunities to simply have things to do that are of interest & possibly be of help to others. Serving the needs of others is, I believe, a pretty-much proven method of reducing depression.

Good luck... & please keep posting!